Did you marry for money?

[Anonymous]

I married for prestige but after feeling like we have to keep up with the jone's I'm not sure it was such a great idea. I still love my DH but wish he wasn't so worried about keeping up with his peers and family and having the trappings of upper middle class, which we can't afford.

[Anonymous]

I don't care what a person's initial motivator was for getting married - its never going to turn out as expected.

[Anonymous]

I liked the person who I married. I may have been attracted to his smarts and intelligence but the fact is that the same smarts and intelligence allowed him to make a good living later on.

So, unless I married a really dumb and poor person, I would say we all marry for money.

Unless we were unattractive and rich and wanted a good looking person - who was dumb and poor? Like Hugh Hefner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My aunt married my uncle for money I believe. He invested in a business and became a millionaire. Left his first wife and married his current wife. They live in a gated community in a mansion, drive luxury cars, etc. She recently upgraded all their furniture and bestowed some of their 'old' expensive furniture on me (Jackpot for me, lol). She only wears expensive clothes, louboutins, etc. Hasn't worked since they married, even though they have no kids together.

I do think they love each other, but I'm pretty sure his wallet made things more exciting for her. And also, he is a well known cheater so I'm sure the money makes it easier to overlook.

I can't lie I sometimes wish I'd married for money cause I hate working a job, just being honest. My DH went to a top school and I thought he'd be making more money by now. If for some unlikely reason my marriage fails, money will definitely be a big factor in my next marriage.

Sick, you did marry for money but it hasn't panned. You have mentally planned your exit.

[Anonymous]

Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

[Anonymous]

I only dated men with money and sure enough fell in love with one. We are happily married and he treats me like a queen. I know I'm lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

up front about money...and the fact that if you try to leave his family will stone your @$$. thank, but no thanks. i'll role the dice on love and make my own money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

up front about money...and the fact that if you try to leave his family will stone your @$$. thank, but no thanks. i'll role the dice on love and make my own money.

I think they stone for cheating but go ahead spread on some more ignorance to your posting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

up front about money...and the fact that if you try to leave his family will stone your @$$. thank, but no thanks. i'll role the dice on love and make my own money.

I think they stone for cheating but go ahead spread on some more ignorance to your posting.

oh, in that case, all is fine and dandy. and no woman has ever been falsely accused of cheating

[Anonymous]

A man is not a plan.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/pauline-gaines/stay-at-home-mom_b_4353753.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

Some cultures are not forgiving with divorce. Even though they are not happy, they are stuck with it and cannot divorce without being shunned and disowned by their families.

[Anonymous]

I think there's more to those marriages lasting than just "fear of divorce" or whatever other negative quality you want to give a non-white culture. I'm marrying a very wealthy Indian businessman in June, and the men in his family (including him) are very family oriented. His parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents all have great, fulfilling relationships. Maybe not all sparks and romance, but it's nice to marry someone from such a stable, wholesome family with old-fashioned values.

And yes, his money played a role in my attraction to him. I'm a lower middle class white girl paying off her student loans - of course I'm going to care about my future husband's prospects. But, I also happened to have found a good, caring, warm-hearted, gentlemanly man who has the right values and would be a great father.

[Anonymous]

Nice, PP. You admit you're marrying him for his money, and he gets to have the white trophy wife that Indian men are obsessed with. You two deserve each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Marrying for money isn't such a bad thing. Many people marry for "true love" and then divorce 10 years later because of financial stresses.

South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures practice arranged marriage in which they are very upfront about money, and those marriages last.

Exactly! The same thing with most cultures around the world. Women in Africa, Asia, and in Latin America we know the deal. If you don't have money or a certain bank account, then you will not be consider a potential prospect.

Love doesn't pay the bills, pay for college tuition, put food on the table, pay for piano lessons, pay for a house, pay for extra-curricular activities for children, pay for weddings, pay for health issues, or secure you in case there is a death or a divorce. Love.....HA! There is no security in love.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the PP who said: "I don't know anyone who married for money, but I do know several couples that won't divorce because of it."

I wonder what "marrying for money" really means to the original poster. Do they mean marry someone only for money or only not to have to go to work? Also, money is relative. Some people think low to mid six figures is "money" or a woman not having to work is "money"; some people have a different definition of how much money is enough.

I married someone who makes not much more than I do, but we both do well. Neither of us probably would have married the other person without taking this into consideration--we both worry about money as part of our personality although we have enough. Marriage is not passion (love is, but they don't always go hand in hand...or at least the initial passion fades into companionate love, which is normal and common). It is more like a business relationship. He would have not married someone who wanted to be a SAHM. I would not have married someone who did not make at least as much as me. I joke with people that he married me for my 401k because I have a little more than him even though he earns more than I do. We don't spend a lot of money (we don't have designer things). Our money is in investments not on our bodies or in our garage. We are savers.

If ideal love and marriage go together, all the power to people who have this. But sometimes, people end of being more practical when it comes to marriage. At the same time, I don't respect golddiggers at all.