Lessons Learned - The College Application Process

[Anonymous]

I work in admissions and I agree that "passion"has run its course as an admissions buzzword. At a conference I attended last year the admissions director at a top SLAC got a big round of applause when she said, "if I'm 40-something and I still don't know what my passion is, how can I expect a 17-year-old to know that." I think "passion" is actually a catchall for a number of qualities that many colleges are seeking in their students: motivation, curiosity, engagement, perseverance, leadership and creativity. There are many ways to exhibit these traits and every applicant is not expected to have them all. Another admissions director (from a major research university) noted that not everyone is a leader and that you wouldn't want to have a class made up only of leaders. Finally, I would note as a parent who has gone through this process twice with my own children, humor and modesty can also go a long way in admissions (as in life). My younger son wrote a very funny essay about coaching his little sister's soccer team and learning a lot about humility in the process. He was admitted to his first-choice school and got a personal note from the regional admissions staffer about how much he had enjoyed the essay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in admissions and I agree that "passion"has run its course as an admissions buzzword. At a conference I attended last year the admissions director at a top SLAC got a big round of applause when she said, "if I'm 40-something and I still don't know what my passion is, how can I expect a 17-year-old to know that." I think "passion" is actually a catchall for a number of qualities that many colleges are seeking in their students: motivation, curiosity, engagement, perseverance, leadership and creativity. There are many ways to exhibit these traits and every applicant is not expected to have them all. Another admissions director (from a major research university) noted that not everyone is a leader and that you wouldn't want to have a class made up only of leaders. Finally, I would note as a parent who has gone through this process twice with my own children, humor and modesty can also go a long way in admissions (as in life). My younger son wrote a very funny essay about coaching his little sister's soccer team and learning a lot about humility in the process. He was admitted to his first-choice school and got a personal note from the regional admissions staffer about how much he had enjoyed the essay.

you shouldn't have said this. Now I predict colleges this admissions season will be deluged with "funny" essays. Whatever works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let's hope I am. Look at the stats of rejected applicants to Duke on College Confidential if you want to see what keeps me up at night.

Where on College Confidential can you find stats on rejected applicants?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in admissions and I agree that "passion"has run its course as an admissions buzzword. At a conference I attended last year the admissions director at a top SLAC got a big round of applause when she said, "if I'm 40-something and I still don't know what my passion is, how can I expect a 17-year-old to know that." I think "passion" is actually a catchall for a number of qualities that many colleges are seeking in their students: motivation, curiosity, engagement, perseverance, leadership and creativity. There are many ways to exhibit these traits and every applicant is not expected to have them all. Another admissions director (from a major research university) noted that not everyone is a leader and that you wouldn't want to have a class made up only of leaders. Finally, I would note as a parent who has gone through this process twice with my own children, humor and modesty can also go a long way in admissions (as in life). My younger son wrote a very funny essay about coaching his little sister's soccer team and learning a lot about humility in the process. He was admitted to his first-choice school and got a personal note from the regional admissions staffer about how much he had enjoyed the essay.

Wow that's so impressive when you consider the number of essays the admissions staffers have to read. It must be mind-numbing. Your son must be very talented with respect to telling his story; a useful skill in the work world as well as during the college admissions process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's hope I am. Look at the stats of rejected applicants to Duke on College Confidential if you want to see what keeps me up at night.

Where on College Confidential can you find stats on rejected applicants?

Go to the forums for different colleges and check out the threads for "ED 2017 results" for early admissions decisions in Dec 2012, and the threads for regular decision results from last spring. There are threads like these for most colleges, where kids put ACCEPTED or REJECTED at the top and then their stats. Lots of joy and pain there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All good points. I own a college counseling business (out of the area) and think it is very beneficial to some families. For some parents we have to hold their hand throughout every step of the way. I disagree with the pp that says that counseling doesn't help at all. I know some students that are clueless on the college essay and working with a professional makes all the difference.

The only thing I can add (goes along with what people say about starting freshman yr). It is very important to find something to set your son or daughter apart. Community service is a standard requirement at most hs these days, doesn't set you apart. One example was an average (no AP or honors courses), 500 per section SAT, no clubs and minimal sports. He had started his own landscaping business and also became an EMT. He was accepted to every school he applied to (10) purely on those achievements (I say that bc his grades and SAT scores were below the recommended levels.

Left out that he was also "diverse"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I don't know how you best develop a balance between preparing appropriately for college and losing perspective but I think some of y'all have slid over on the losing perspective side.

To each his/her own. We will be paying a quarter of a million dollars for college. That's a huge investment. And the last really big parental obligation to the future of my child. It's worth the effort.

It used to be that at then end of high school, graduates were seen as young adults who set out to be more independent and to start to live their own life. Now we have parents as early as MS scripting their child's lives all the way through college. Soon it will be that parents script and financially support kids till the end of their twenties - there will be no end to adolescence! At some point you have to back off and start letting your children grow-up and make decisions and live their own lives.

The time to back off for us isn't when a quarter of a million dollars is the investment. Feel free to do that yourself if you'd like. Like I said, to each his/her own.

I find this a particularly troubling post. I know college is expensive, and we are all anxious that our children do well in life, but to consider college an "investment" seems a little off to me. Do you consider your child an "investment," PP? Do you expect a return on all the money you have "invested" in your child? Will you receive interest on this "investment"?

We recently moved to this region of the country, and are appalled by the intensity of the college application process here on the East Coast, and in the DC area in particular. Parents seem to view their child's choice of college as a direct reflection on the rightness of the parents' own "investment" in their child. That's what I find off.

I have a child in high school, and yes, we are starting to think about college. But I'm trying very, very hard to stay as low-key as possible, and not allow my child to get caught up in the college hysteria. DC goes to a competitive private school, is a good student and athlete, yet I could not care less where my child attends college, as long as my child is happy and comfortable with the choice. I went to an Ivy League school, but that was a long time ago, and I'm certain my child would not be accepted to the same school. (BTW, I was accepted at U of Chicago, and I turned my nose up completely at it! It was my safety school! I'm shocked to learn it's so difficult to get into now!)

I don't think of college as an investment. I think of it as four years for my child to grow intellectually, emotionally, socially, and yes, physically, into an adult. I don't see it as preparation for a job or graduate school. I loved my college years because they broke open for me an entire universe I'd never considered previously. To this very day, I see the imprint of my college years on nearly everything I do. Graduate school was my job preparation, but my undergraduate years were for exploration, and I treasured every minute of that precious opportunity, which has never presented itself again.

We won't look at colleges, unless DC asks us to, until the summer after sophomore year or later. DC is already asking about selective colleges, and I've been saying that "the best college is the one that's right for you." I will support my child, but I refuse to get caught up in preparing or pushing my child toward one school or another, as I see many parents doing. In my child's sport, I witnessed a parent screaming at his child for not doing better at this sport because the child's chances for getting into an Ivy League school would be diminished. This is a very financially successful self-made parent who apparently views his child as an extension of himself. If the kid doesn't get into an Ivy, the parents' "investment" will not pay dividends. So sad. I'm glad I'm strong enough not to see my child as an accomplishment or a reflection of my own value. I have not "invested" anything in my child, except love, which is already repaid many, many times over.

You must have practised that BS in front of a mirror for hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lighten up, people. You're in danger of producing perfect little darlings who will go off to Harvard, crack up, and discover they can't function as adult human beings. Your investment will end with them living in your basement at age 30.

Seen it. Back off. 1:07 is right.

- a Harvard and Yale grad who has worked-- recently -- for both colleges' admissions offices.

Because so many Harvard grads "crack up" and can't function as adults.

Strange I know quite a few Harvard grads and not one has cracked up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can we take the word passion over to the trash can and drop it in?

Could you make using the word passion a finable offense?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can we take the word passion over to the trash can and drop it in?

ITA. Have grown to HATE that word!

[Anonymous]

Me too. I think "passion" in high school equals narrowly-focused and unwilling/unable to explore a variety of interests. If your whole life is spent in the pool, or playing the violin, you don't really have a whole lot to talk about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Me too. I think "passion" in high school equals narrowly-focused and unwilling/unable to explore a variety of interests. If your whole life is spent in the pool, or playing the violin, you don't really have a whole lot to talk about.

That's where the most selective colleges get you. I don't think "passion" has ever meant chaining your ankle to your concertmaster's chair. You have to be a star swimmer or award-winning violinist (the aforesaid "passion") AND you have to have leadership skills as evidenced by being president of some club or starting another club AND your teachers' recs have to indicate that you're an enthusiastic participant in class with your highly original ideas.

At DC's college interview the alumnae interviewer kept talking about how she wanted to see a "spark," which I suppose must have come from the admissions offices' latest instructions.

[Anonymous]

Some people might consider this unethical, but the easiest way to get at least a 100 point SAT advantage is to specify that you are black when you fill out the SAT demographic questions. In other words, a 500 for a black student is equivalent to at least a 600 for a white student.

We're white, but my daughter marked black for race. (There's no genetic test for race, by the way.) Her total SAT was 1710 and her high school GPA is 2.93. She got into every highly competitive school to which she applied (she didn't apply to any Ivys, though) and she is getting merit scholarship offers out the kazoo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some people might consider this unethical, but the easiest way to get at least a 100 point SAT advantage is to specify that you are black when you fill out the SAT demographic questions. In other words, a 500 for a black student is equivalent to at least a 600 for a white student.

We're white, but my daughter marked black for race. (There's no genetic test for race, by the way.) Her total SAT was 1710 and her high school GPA is 2.93. She got into every highly competitive school to which she applied (she didn't apply to any Ivys, though) and she is getting merit scholarship offers out the kazoo.

Most AA/black applicants who apply out of local private schools have much higher gpas and board scores than this. Most schools that they apply to require an interview (Ivies & SLACs). Admissions is extremely competitive. The only lousy scores and gpas similar to your DD's that I've ever heard of are those belonging to elite athletes (race not a factor, just talent). On second thought, the numbers you posted are just too low. Perhaps, your DD had some sort of EC or leadership quality that made her application special. Checking the AA/black box with subpar "qualifications," doesn't fill a mailbox full of acceptance letters. If this is for real, were these top 50 schools or state schools (down South)?

I hear that applying as an Native American will also gain you some extra points. PP, it's kind of pitiful that you encouraged your DD to go this route, sounds like you were a great role model.

I'm assuming your reply is fake and you want to start a fight.

[Anonymous]

Actually, you need to be 1/4 minority to claim minority status for things like Presidential Merit Scholarships. That's the convention at DD's school, at least. This results in plenty of kids who aren't visibly minority even if one grandparent was hispanic or AA. But I assume the interviewers figure this out in the first minute.

So 9:57 basically told her daughter to lie. Yes, I consider that "unethical" as you say.

Agree with 11:11, I know AA kids from top independents who have much higher SATs, who think the ivies are a stretch. So I'm thinking, if 9:57 told her DD to lie on the college application, then she has no problem lying on DCUM?