You know you are utterly sleep deprived when...

[Anonymous]

When your toddler asks you why Big Bird is looking in Oscar's trash can and you say, "Because he wanted to know how much to mark up the furniture." HUH?!

[Anonymous]

When you lock your baby in the car outside of toddler's pre-school.

[Anonymous]

When you put desitin on your toothbrush instead of toothpaste.

You sit down on the toilet and pee on the top having forgotten to open it...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is there milk dripping in my lap?!!?! Oh yea, I started pumping before I attached the collection bottles!

I did that! Milk all over my leg, the chair, the ground before I noticed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:desperately search for your cell phone.....then realize you are talking on it.

I do this almost every day.

[Anonymous]

Start actively hallucinating.

[Anonymous]

When you drive to an evening class and then take the metro home, forgetting that you left you car there until the following morning when your spouse asks you where the car is.

[Anonymous]

I did soooooooo many of these when I had newborns. Bless all you new moms!

[Anonymous]

When you get into the shower with your nursing bra and underwear still on but don't really care because at least you are getting a shower (which doesn't happen every day because you have a 19 month old and a 2 month old).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:... when you wake up and frantically look for your baby under your bed covers because you can't remember putting her back in her bassinet after nursing. Then when DH points to the bassinet with her in it, you look over and then continue frantically looking for her under the covers of your bed.

OMG, we did the exact same thing repeatedly in the first three months.

[Anonymous]

You think you hearing what that person is saying...until he asks you a question, and you have NO IDEA what he's being saying for the past 5 minutes. And that guy is your boss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to stop and think about how old you are because you can't actually remember. I still can't remember if I'm 31 or 32 and I'm too lazy to do the math.

I did just this the other day, even the same ages.

[Anonymous]

when you finally, FINALLY, get a few minutes to make yourself a sandwich because the incredibly fussy baby is napping...and you are putting the finishing touches on your masterpiece hummus/avocado/tomato/cucumber when you realize that you just picked up the spray bottle of counter cleaner and sprayed your sandwich with Simple Green instead of putting hummus on it.

and you are so tired and hungry that you contemplate, just for a split second, of taking off the top layer and eating it anyway.