You know you are utterly sleep deprived when...

[Anonymous]

You have to stop and think about how old you are because you can't actually remember. I still can't remember if I'm 31 or 32 and I'm too lazy to do the math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you get in the shower wearing your socks...look down, notice them, and continue showering because you are too tired to bend down and take them off until you're ready to get out.

Also in the shower...when you've been in there for 10 minutes and can't for the life of you remember if you shampoo'ed your hair yet or not...so you do it again...twice.

Ohhhhh...I've done this too

[Anonymous]

Spent an hour frantically looking for the keys, decided to go outside and see if I just left the car running all night and there they were in the front door... In Logan Circle. Lovely.

Countless times I have turned off the monitor in my sleep and then awoken, who knows how long after, to an absolutely sobbing baby. I feel so horrible but I don't realize I am even doing it or how long the baby was crying--minutes, hours? Who knows?

My aunt and uncle, twenty years ago when my twin cousins were JUST born were putting the kids in the car and my uncle drove away with one of my cousins still on the roof, in his carseat and he fell off! He was fine but that is sooo scary.

[Anonymous]

I tried to put the leash on the baby instead of dog

[Anonymous]

Hmm, just in the last 3 months I:

---passed a kidney stone, a big one, and didn't even feel it while spending the week alone with DD 23 months and DD 6 weeks.

---flooded the downstairs neighbors by leaving sink running to pre-soak poopy clothes while leaving room to tend to baby.

---Ruined multiple pots of coffee by doing it wrong (it is only 3 steps, pour water, coffee in filter, push on).

---Thought I locked stroller, to see it roll into the street (see other thread)

---Just today: gently side-swiped car as I parked, not on cell phone and by myself in car, just thought I had enough room.

[Anonymous]

You wake up after you've tapped the car in front of you while in traffic on the way to daycare/work.

[Anonymous]

You absolutely know you now have Alzheimers. (can't remember how to spell it). I had a memory of an elephant before children, I mean sleep deprivation, now I have to write every thing down. I can't even remember what I wrote down means. I have to spell it out completely. No more short hand for me.

[Anonymous]

you stumble down to make coffee at 5 am before baby wakes. everythings going great....grinds in the filter, pour water in, turn on the machine. but you forget to put pot under the spout and come back 10 minutes later to coffee in every conceivable crevice of your kitchen. you begin to sob.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You pay your mortgage twice in one month.

You stop at a red light and put your head back for just a second...and wake up to a green light and cars honking at you.

It takes you two hours to start a load of laundry because you go downstairs to get that dirty shirt in the living room, then see the pile of outgrown clothes that need to be put away, then go back upstairs and do the dishes, then take a shower, then realize you started the load of laundry, then go back downstairs to get that dirty shirt...you get the idea.

You can't remember for the life of you if you took your vitamin this morning.


This - except you may or may not have taken the vitamin five minutes ago.

Also, you realize that you left a load of laundry to dry in your building's dryer over a month ago. Now it's gone...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take the kids to the park, then when trying to get back into the car, you can't find your keys. OMG where could they be? Now drag your toddler and newborn back to the park to re trace your steps and search the entire park. Still can't find them. Go back to the car, maybe they fell out near the car. Still can't find them. Now really starting to panic and baby is starting to cry so my blood pressure is rising. Oh here they are, right in the diaper bag where they should be. Are you kidding me?????

Or you freak out because you think you locked your 2 month old in the car, contemplate breaking a window, call 911, try to explain (while sobbing) to the police officer that the stupid car key remote (that you just pulled out of your pocket to show her) has dead batteries and won't unlock the car; just to have her reach over push the button so the key pops out and say "but honey won't this unlock the car?" Thank god it was a women/mother who understood

[Anonymous]

forget to wash the conditioner out of your hair and then blow dry it wondering why it won't just dry already....

take your 1 year old and 3 year old for a walk....get out of the house (somehow), walk, come home, go in the garage and remember you locked the garage door. Go to unlock your front door, realize you don't have keys. Get your keys from your neighbor, unlock the door. The next morning, search desperately for your keys which aren't in your purse or house. Find them in the stroller you took on the walk yesterday.....sigh.

[Anonymous]

desperately search for your cell phone.....then realize you are talking on it.

[Anonymous]

You wake up to find warm milk in your lap, all over the chair, and on the floor. You fell asleep to the hum of the pump - which was 1 hour ago.

[Anonymous]

You routinely make lists when you go to the store, even when you only need two items.

You miss the exit on the highway on the way home, swear at yourself for not paying attention, miss the next exit where you meant to turn around, and finally put on the gps just so it would remind you to get off the highway.

Tell your husband and 3 year old that you are pooping just so you can have a minute alone in the bathroom to put your head down in your hands while you sit on the pot even though the baby is crying.

[jillcausa]

you throw all the breakfast dishes in the trash