Playdate phone basket

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had a phone on a play date and managed to ask to borrow the home phone if I needed one just fine.

+1

What do you think kids did 15 years ago on play dates? They could only contact their parents using the house phone. You all are very naive about what your children do and access on the internet. Even if you say your perfect angel never looks up weird videos or sexual content online, their friends certainly might.

Now most houses don’t have a landline. No matter how much you want to convince yourself otherwise, it’s disturbing for an adult to confiscate a child’s only means of communicating with their parent. This is grooming behavior and it’s a red flag.

A lot of schools don't allow phones anymore either. What then?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled. I hope I can be that courageous when my kids get old enough.

Me too. Elementary and middle school kids do not need unsupervised and unrestricted internet used, especially when in groups.

+1

This is a much bigger concern than mommy needing an immediate answer to whether the kid wants pizza or sushi for dinner.

Agreed. Creepy perverts can hide behind being “good parents” “screen free” and removing all means of communication from kids. Grooming made easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had a phone on a play date and managed to ask to borrow the home phone if I needed one just fine.

+1

What do you think kids did 15 years ago on play dates? They could only contact their parents using the house phone. You all are very naive about what your children do and access on the internet. Even if you say your perfect angel never looks up weird videos or sexual content online, their friends certainly might.

Now most houses don’t have a landline. No matter how much you want to convince yourself otherwise, it’s disturbing for an adult to confiscate a child’s only means of communicating with their parent. This is grooming behavior and it’s a red flag.

A lot of schools don't allow phones anymore either. What then?

Try to keep up. We’re talking about an adult alone with kids in a house and preventing the kids from communicating with their parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled. I hope I can be that courageous when my kids get old enough.

Me too. Elementary and middle school kids do not need unsupervised and unrestricted internet used, especially when in groups.

+1

This is a much bigger concern than mommy needing an immediate answer to whether the kid wants pizza or sushi for dinner.

Agreed. Creepy perverts can hide behind being “good parents” “screen free” and removing all means of communication from kids. Grooming made easy.

People like you should just never allow your kids out of the house. You can never be too safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had a phone on a play date and managed to ask to borrow the home phone if I needed one just fine.

+1

What do you think kids did 15 years ago on play dates? They could only contact their parents using the house phone. You all are very naive about what your children do and access on the internet. Even if you say your perfect angel never looks up weird videos or sexual content online, their friends certainly might.

Now most houses don’t have a landline. No matter how much you want to convince yourself otherwise, it’s disturbing for an adult to confiscate a child’s only means of communicating with their parent. This is grooming behavior and it’s a red flag.

A lot of schools don't allow phones anymore either. What then?

Try to keep up. We’re talking about an adult alone with kids in a house and preventing the kids from communicating with their parent.

Your kids don't even want to talk to you. They are probably relieved to get away from you for a few hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's weird, but mostly because none of my 10 year old son's friends bring devices to our house. A few that walk over have gizmo type watches. I have no reason to confiscate anything. It would just make me wonder what the mom thought would happen if she didnt.

My son has no devices so im just not able to picture this being a thing that needs action.

Yeah, I think it’s a red flag to confiscate a watch.

Any time an adult tells a child they can’t contact their parents, the adult is the problem. It’s creepy and inappropriate.

If the adult is creepy, why is your kid at their house?

Obviously because I didn’t know. My kid would not go back.

And like most creepy adults, they are great at masking in public and wait until they’re behind closed doors to show their true colors.

Well, I'm 100 percent certain that there are many many creepy people on the Internet. Which many kids access via phones and computers and show each other when they're hanging out together.

The odds of curious kids finding creepy or titillating stuff on the Internet is way higher than a parent at a random playdate acting inappropriately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled. I hope I can be that courageous when my kids get old enough.

Me too. Elementary and middle school kids do not need unsupervised and unrestricted internet used, especially when in groups.

+1

This is a much bigger concern than mommy needing an immediate answer to whether the kid wants pizza or sushi for dinner.

Agreed. Creepy perverts can hide behind being “good parents” “screen free” and removing all means of communication from kids. Grooming made easy.

People like you should just never allow your kids out of the house. You can never be too safe.

Please. My kids are allowed to bike for hours all over the neighborhood. They are allowed the type of freedom you fear.

The reason they are allowed to do this is because they have a watch and call for help in an emergency. I also talk to them about never ignoring the gut feeling that something is wrong. The discomfort you want OP’s child to ignore.

My kids know that any adult who wants to block them from calling a parent is not a safe person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled too. Kids don’t need electronics while on a play date. Their house their rules.

Eh, if you're going to confiscate things, you should tell the parents beforehand. I would be fine a parent asking the kids to put phones away. Not fine with her taking them.

The phone is put away in the basket.

That’s very different than the kid putting their phone away in their backpack.

If the kid felt uncomfortable and wanted to ask their parent to come pick them up, they would need to go ask creepy mom to use their phone. For a kid who already feels uncomfortable and wants to avoid creepy mom, that could be really hard and extra stressful.

So kids can’t go on play dates until they have their own phones just in case the mom is creepy???

Why are you so insistent on blocking a kid from contacting their parents? THAT is creepy and once I knew that’s what your house is like I would never send my kid back. Just like I would if I heard that you had cameras in the bathrooms “for safety” or any other creepy behavior.

So you think a parent trying to prevent 10 year olds from unrestricted access to the internet at their house, is the same as a parent putting a camera in their bathroom? You’ve lost the plot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not be ok with it as there can be abuse or something bad in that home and you want your child to have a way to contact you. Removing an apple watch is silly.

Honest question- did you not let your child have drop off play dates until they had their own cellphone or Apple Watch? Like you’d go and sit in the living room making small talk for 2 hours when your second grader went to a friends house after school?

[Anonymous]

I think it’s great for elementary.
If you did this for MS and up it would stop kids wanting to come to your house.
My kid relayed to me in 6th grade that 2 friends told her I’m too controlling because I said not to be on phones when hanging at our house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled too. Kids don’t need electronics while on a play date. Their house their rules.

Eh, if you're going to confiscate things, you should tell the parents beforehand. I would be fine a parent asking the kids to put phones away. Not fine with her taking them.

The phone is put away in the basket.

Right, I wouldn't say they are confiscated. It's like keys going in the fishbowl before heavy drinking. The parent is not taking all phones and watches and locking them in an upper cabinet so kids cannot possibly contact their parents in case they are being mistreated. Is this what feels creepy to you? I think the harm of kids being on electronics and social media all the time is way more prevalent than being harmed by going in a group to a trusted friend's mom's houses to play.

You never know what goes on behind closed doors. Even people you think you can trust. I worked for CPS for many years and we even had one social worker investigated for abuse. Sadly, you cannot trust anyone.

So stop letting your kid go to other homes. Their phone isn’t going to prevent abuse. If anything their phone is going to be the tool in which someone contacts them to groom them .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled. I hope I can be that courageous when my kids get old enough.

Me too. Elementary and middle school kids do not need unsupervised and unrestricted internet used, especially when in groups.

+1

This is a much bigger concern than mommy needing an immediate answer to whether the kid wants pizza or sushi for dinner.

Agreed. Creepy perverts can hide behind being “good parents” “screen free” and removing all means of communication from kids. Grooming made easy.

People like you should just never allow your kids out of the house. You can never be too safe.

Please. My kids are allowed to bike for hours all over the neighborhood. They are allowed the type of freedom you fear.

The reason they are allowed to do this is because they have a watch and call for help in an emergency. I also talk to them about never ignoring the gut feeling that something is wrong. The discomfort you want OP’s child to ignore.

My kids know that any adult who wants to block them from calling a parent is not a safe person.

You are nutty. Your kid isn't safer because they carry a phone. Do you think your kid can overpower an adult who wants to harm them just because of a phone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled too. Kids don’t need electronics while on a play date. Their house their rules.

Eh, if you're going to confiscate things, you should tell the parents beforehand. I would be fine a parent asking the kids to put phones away. Not fine with her taking them.

The phone is put away in the basket.

That’s very different than the kid putting their phone away in their backpack.

If the kid felt uncomfortable and wanted to ask their parent to come pick them up, they would need to go ask creepy mom to use their phone. For a kid who already feels uncomfortable and wants to avoid creepy mom, that could be really hard and extra stressful.

So kids can’t go on play dates until they have their own phones just in case the mom is creepy???

Why are you so insistent on blocking a kid from contacting their parents? THAT is creepy and once I knew that’s what your house is like I would never send my kid back. Just like I would if I heard that you had cameras in the bathrooms “for safety” or any other creepy behavior.

So you think a parent trying to prevent 10 year olds from unrestricted access to the internet at their house, is the same as a parent putting a camera in their bathroom? You’ve lost the plot.

They weren’t trying to block unrestricted internet access. They took away a watch which only has calling and texting. They hid behind “no internet” to block access to communication which is creepy grooming behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had a phone on a play date and managed to ask to borrow the home phone if I needed one just fine.

+1

What do you think kids did 15 years ago on play dates? They could only contact their parents using the house phone. You all are very naive about what your children do and access on the internet. Even if you say your perfect angel never looks up weird videos or sexual content online, their friends certainly might.

Now most houses don’t have a landline. No matter how much you want to convince yourself otherwise, it’s disturbing for an adult to confiscate a child’s only means of communicating with their parent. This is grooming behavior and it’s a red flag.

A lot of schools don't allow phones anymore either. What then?

Schools are full of other people, presumably at least one trusted adult. It’s a lot easier for a child to ask for help in a school.

A play date with one parent home?

Kid: “I think I want to go home.”
Parent: “Why?! You’re fiiiiine.”

Kid doesn’t really have an option.

I’m pretty anti-screen, but I can see how sending a kid with a watch makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be thrilled. I hope I can be that courageous when my kids get old enough.

Me too. Elementary and middle school kids do not need unsupervised and unrestricted internet used, especially when in groups.

+1

This is a much bigger concern than mommy needing an immediate answer to whether the kid wants pizza or sushi for dinner.

Agreed. Creepy perverts can hide behind being “good parents” “screen free” and removing all means of communication from kids. Grooming made easy.

People like you should just never allow your kids out of the house. You can never be too safe.

Please. My kids are allowed to bike for hours all over the neighborhood. They are allowed the type of freedom you fear.

The reason they are allowed to do this is because they have a watch and call for help in an emergency. I also talk to them about never ignoring the gut feeling that something is wrong. The discomfort you want OP’s child to ignore.

My kids know that any adult who wants to block them from calling a parent is not a safe person.

You are nutty. Your kid isn't safer because they carry a phone. Do you think your kid can overpower an adult who wants to harm them just because of a phone?

No, but they can contact home when they get a weird feeling. You know, BEFORE the adult actually tries something awful.