We didn’t start carpooling until the youngest was only in a booster. We started one carpool because a neighbor’s work schedule conflicted and her son needed a ride to practice. She offered to bring the kids home. I could have picked mine up, but it was nice not to have to. Several years later, we still carpool even though we may not have conflicts. It’s very convenient for both if us to have someone when something does pop up. |
My son is in aftercare with another kid on his soccer team. I'm already picking my own son up, so I'll pick their kid up too. They do the same for me too. Car seats? How small are your kids? My kids were in car seats until K and then moved to boosters. At 8, they didn't need boosters. I keep an extra booster seat in my car. We all have vans, expeditions, grand wagoneers or other cars that have 3 rows. Many of us out here in suburbia have 3 kids (every single house on my culdesac is 3+) so we mostly have bigger cars that we use for carpooling. I would never allow my kids to sit up front in someone's car. |
This. They don’t know how to (or just don’t want to) just hand out at home and be together. Cue all the people saying that have plenty of time for activities 7 days a week and still plenty of family time, on top of school/jobs. The math doesn’t work. |
How cute that you think having two parents who get home by 5 every night in order to have a sit down dinner with their 2.4 kids is the only way to be a family or spend family time. |
That 0.4 kid probably needs a lot of extra attention |
I was a pretty unscheduled kid and my family had dinner together most nights. But the truth is my mom was lazy and wanted to smoke cigarettes, drink beer with the neighbors, watch tv and do anything but drive us to activities. So great! But she did get dinner on the table by the time my dad came home. Real quality family time! |
A willingness to schlep your kid to endless activities so you can surf your phone or do work while they are there is not the flex you think it is. It’s embarrassing how many of my students get to upper elementary school having no clue how to play basic board games or cards during indoor recess. |
because they go to activiies? wut |
What I’m telling you is my parents weren’t doing any of this with us either. Your Leave it to Beaver fantasies weren’t true then or now as to how kids spend their time. You know who played board game and card games? Our grandparents. |
Some of us have spent years schlepping our kids to activities WHILE playing card games with their younger siblings on the sidelines as opposed to surfing our phone. Where there's a will, there's a way. |
| Winnin |
| There is no way to have healthy, reasonably-timed sit down family dinners on a regular basis is all the kids are constantly in activities. |
It’s not a Leave it to Beaver fantasy. My kids didn’t have an activity more than one day a week until middle school at the earliest. Elementary School was family dinners, relaxed unstructured family time off screens, and early bedtimes. |
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I have three kids but they’re younger than yours. Right now only the older two have activities and I stagger them. And my father helps drive them places (my husband does not help with activities during work hours.)
I grew up as one of four kids and my mom did nearly everything. Most of our activities were drop off and we were all shuttled around. I remember going to my older brothers hockey, baseball and basketball games and my sisters mock trial meets at night and on weekends. Somehow my mom just made it work. I think occasionally my grandparents would also babysit? Nobody carpooled with us because we lived in a different neighborhood than most of our friends. So, yeah, we staggered activities, all did tennis lessons back to back with the same instructor, did homework at siblings sport practice sometimes and a bunch of activities were through school so it was just one pickup. |
What works for you doesn’t make it right or best for everyone. Different strokes. And how old are your kids now? |