Divorced dating sex life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so sad

Yet you are reading it. That’s sad! I’m enjoying it- like I am my sex life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a divorced male age 58 and my sex life has been quite an adventure. I'll keep it simple but the biggest surprise was a woman who was 70-ish who came on to me while we were both at a golf school. She definitely looked younger and she had the sexual energy of someone half her age. I'm not sure anything was off limits and she wore me out as she definitely was not one and done. I think her sexual history was likely quite different from mine!

52F and last year I had a brief relationship with a 70+ guy. His foreplay skills were out of this world such that he should have written a book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:xH is still the best in bed I’ve ever slept with, but he had almost zero interest in sex. So I’ve gone from a 10 every 1-2 months to a 5-8 whenever I want.

I know eventually I’ll find another 10 so just gotta keep test driving new men.

What made xH a 10? Seems like finding someone good shouldn’t be too hard.

Intense physical chemistry plus he did a lot of little things that I loved. I can find good, which is fine, but it’s not as good. And it’s things that are difficult to explain - like how do you explain to a man you want him to look at you a certain way or take off your thong in a very specific way? I’ve tried sending videos with examples of what I want but men rarely follow through.

It’s not BAD sex, but it’s not the level I really want.

Why did you divorce then?

He had almost zero interest in sex with me, tried to cheat on me for years, ADHD, depressed, did nothing at home, spent a bunch of money and racked up debt without me knowing, got angry at me for asking him to do basic things like clean, wanted nothing to do with our family so weekends were me taking the kids out so he could have “alone time” which was really him going out with our neighbor, drug addiction….the list goes on and on.

Zero regrets. I’ll still take my peace and good-not-great sex whenever I want it over a chaotic home with hot sex 4-5 times a year. But, still, sigh. I just want someone to toss me around and call me a good girl.

Can you still see him occasionally just for sex?

😀

Dont go pushing PP back in the lion's den.

[Anonymous]

I’d rather have no sex, than wear a condom. The guy feels nothing wearing one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Late 30sF having the best sex of my life post divorce. Been sleeping with an early 40s lawyer for a year and that man takes me universes I cannot even comprehend. It is otherworldly across every metric- physically, emotionally, communication, laughter, intensity,.frequency, openness, respect

It’s because you’re in your late 30s. Enjoy the peak.

[Anonymous]

55 year old woman and having the best sex of my life with a 58 year old man. He is not as fit or as hung as Ex-DH or many of my prior partners (did a LOT of dating immediately post break up), but he more than makes up for it with his energy, desire and creativity. We have been together for two years now (exclusive) and still sometimes have sex three times a day.

For the poster who said she has never asked a man to be exclusive: why not? I asked BF to be exclusive. He was attracted to the idea of non-monogamy (understandable, as he was coming out of a 35 year marriage with not much sex!).

When we first started dating we were not exclusive and initially he said he could not imagine wanting to be in monogamous relationship ever again. I was initially okay with this, as I was still in my own post-breakup "just having fun" mode. But things somehow got very serious very quickly. We just had an incredibly strong connection, both sexually and emotionally. After a while I told him I wasn't comfortable continuing in the relationship unless it was monogamous and he was fine with that. So far, so good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Dating multiple partners makes building trust very hard, but some of the most intense and sincere relationships I've had post divorce were not exclusive. A lot of people can form a really strong emotional connection even though they have trouble with commitment. The lack of commitment may actually make it easier to form the emotional connection for some people. Other people just feel nervous, cold, or angry when the relationship isn't exclusive. A lot of DCUM people think that's nuts, or a lie, but it's true for some people. Obviously the people like that aren't usually a good match for the people who need commitment to be comfortable, sexual, etc.

As a woman, I found the same. But I can't continue having sex with a man after maybe 3 nights together. When it gets too intense and we "progress" through more intense play, the issue of removing protection and liquids exchange would come up. I just feel frozen and disgusted, can't progress with relationship if I think he might be having unprotected anal with someone when I give him BJ etc. I dumped several men when it got to this stage just stopped seeing them leaving them puzzled as to why. I would never request exclusivity a man should offer that. All I can say I'm no longer comfortable thats all

How do you address this issue sleeping with multiple women?

I find the immediate PP's comment really sad. I literally have always used condoms during sex, even in serious relationships, because both for birth control and for STD protection. If some dude is pressuring you not to use condoms during PIV or oral or anal, he's a jerk and he's probably rife with STDs. My MO is that a guy gets tested and shows me the testing, we agree to exclusivity, and then we still continue to use condoms. I'm not putting my health at risk for a man I'm dating. I've never had a guy break up with me for this.

I actually had multiple men (from apps) back off when I refused unprotected text (they wanted row BJ for example and to me it's unprotected sex). I would request a list of STDs testing that would make me comfortable and they just ghost. I presume they have herpes or worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d rather have no sex, than wear a condom. The guy feels nothing wearing one.

For some men with ED it's easier to finish with condom on. Do you have a lot of STDs?

[Anonymous]

Shouldn't you be focusing on your children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Shouldn't you be focusing on your children?

My adult-aged children are in their 20s, college graduates with professional careers of their own. Neither lives in the DMV. What’s your issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d rather have no sex, than wear a condom. The guy feels nothing wearing one.

I would not go this far. But condoms really do have a significant impact.

-Man

[Anonymous]

For some men with ED it's easier to finish with condom on.

What? This makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Shouldn't you be focusing on your children?

Like, sexually? Gross this isn’t our president we are talking about.

My kids are all in high school and I have every other weekend free. Plenty of time to enjoy my (exclusive) lover now that I’m not carrying around the dead weight of my ex.

[Anonymous]

Divorced at 50. Had sex with around 35 women (ages 25 to 55) the first seven years, then in my late 50s settled down with a woman 30 years younger than me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d rather have no sex, than wear a condom. The guy feels nothing wearing one.

Depends on the brand. A few Japanese brands like .04 are ok. Also Skyn Elite. I sometimes can't finish with most brands but everything works out just fine with those brands most of the time.