What’s really worth it during the elementary years?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early elementary one activity per season, max.

We value and prioritize unstructured play time outside of school and time outside in addition to having a fairly flexible schedule for whatever we want to do.

One activity at a time? I would like to know what your kid’s week looked like at 2nd- 4th grade! I don’t know anyone who only does even just 1 sport at a time.

Mine is:

Mon: free
Tue: piano lesson
Wed: sport practice or game
Thu: free
Fri:free
Sat: language class
Sat or Sun: sometimes a sport game

But no before care or aftercare, so at school 8-3pm and he gets picked up right away for sport or music.

That’s an easy schedule.

That is my point. And it’s 4 activities. I can’t see people doing just 1 activity per semester with all the enrichment and optimization going on.

DP. I have 3 kids. I am still missing 1 of 3 sports practices, but already we have:

Monday: 2 hour sports practice for 1 kid
Tuesday: ?
Wednesday: violin for 1 kid (30 min)
Thursday: ?
Friday: piano for 2 kids overlapping with 2 hour sports practice for the other - I consider overlap ideal as long as we have parents to cover it
Saturday: 3 sports games, 1 for each kid, occasionally 4 or 2 (usually anywhere from 4.5-6 hours of time depending on if games overlap)
Sunday: church, religious education for 2 kids, youth group for 1 kid, 2 sports games for 1 kid who does extra in her sport (5 hour total)

So we'll end up with 1-2 nights free, which is typical for us for any given season of the year. On that free night every other week at least 1 kid will be doing a lesson for her chosen sport, maybe 2 if we let the younger one do lessons. That said, 2 of my kids are late elementary and middle school and starting/continuing to specialize. When they were younger the sports private training was not a thing and the 3rd grader won't do it.

So they each only do 1 sport and 1 instrument plus religious stuff, but we're busier than PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have older kids or have been through the elementary years already, what activities, sports, or outside enrichment have been truly worth it, and why?

There is so much my child is interested in and it’s not reasonable to do it all. STEM class, math, language school, piano, nature sessions, Zoom class, multiple sports leagues, sports camps.

I wonder when I look back several years from now if I will wish I had done it differently and pushed focus on just one or two things year after year. Right now I’m just following enthusiastic child’s changing interests and doing as much as we can fit in without going crazy with driving or cutting into sleep and family time.

STEM class - nonsense, skipt it
math - if the kids is smart, do AOPS, otherwise skip
language school - do it online with a tutor, it's cheaper and easier
piano - big commitment, do it only if you they are gonna do it long term, start young
nature sessions - sounds like nonsense
zoom class - ???
sports - no idea, but i assume it's similar to music. you need to start early and stick to a single sport; otherwise it will eat a lot of resources and won't go anywhere

I disagree, as an adult having a basic foundation in a lot of sports is really helpful. I know the basics and can comfortably jump into casual tennis, golf, skiing, swimming, volleyball, soccer, softball, basketball etc. That makes rec/social engagement really easy.

+1. I don't have this as an adult and especially in college and my 20s really wished I did.

[Anonymous]

I do think there's a huge benefit to gaining basic competency at common sports as a kid when you're small and still bounce well. They're so much harder to learn as an adult. Swimming, skiing, ice skating, water skiing, tennis, etc. Kids don't have to be amazing at any of these, but being able to do a lap around a rink without landing on your tush or getting down a mountain without falling are good skills to have.

One of my goals is for my kids to be open to trying to things and to be life long learners. I've tried to build this skill in them as kids, encouraging them to try lots of different things. We'll see if this value sticks as they become adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do think there's a huge benefit to gaining basic competency at common sports as a kid when you're small and still bounce well. They're so much harder to learn as an adult. Swimming, skiing, ice skating, water skiing, tennis, etc. Kids don't have to be amazing at any of these, but being able to do a lap around a rink without landing on your tush or getting down a mountain without falling are good skills to have.

One of my goals is for my kids to be open to trying to things and to be life long learners. I've tried to build this skill in them as kids, encouraging them to try lots of different things. We'll see if this value sticks as they become adults.

I can skate and ski (and ride horses, fwiw), but I wish I could pass a soccer ball, play ultimate with some level of competence, or hit a softball. All those things are college intramurals or after-work clubs where you can hang out with people. The only time I skate or ski these days is when I take my kids for fun. Golf is even bigger and not on your list, though perhaps that's because it can be picked up in adulthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think there's a huge benefit to gaining basic competency at common sports as a kid when you're small and still bounce well. They're so much harder to learn as an adult. Swimming, skiing, ice skating, water skiing, tennis, etc. Kids don't have to be amazing at any of these, but being able to do a lap around a rink without landing on your tush or getting down a mountain without falling are good skills to have.

One of my goals is for my kids to be open to trying to things and to be life long learners. I've tried to build this skill in them as kids, encouraging them to try lots of different things. We'll see if this value sticks as they become adults.

I can skate and ski (and ride horses, fwiw), but I wish I could pass a soccer ball, play ultimate with some level of competence, or hit a softball. All those things are college intramurals or after-work clubs where you can hang out with people. The only time I skate or ski these days is when I take my kids for fun. Golf is even bigger and not on your list, though perhaps that's because it can be picked up in adulthood.

Yeah, I was focusing on things that are easier to pick up as kids. Sports like volleyball, kickball, golf, and softball are things people can still learn after elementary school without getting hurt or major embarrassment, unlike skating or skiing.

[Anonymous]

swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

[Anonymous]

This is highly dependent on the kid. My one kid does not really want to do anything. She took dance and piano for awhile but stopped.

The other kid (9, almost 10), takes 5 dance classes a week and does competitive figure skating. She has something EVERY DAY. She does not want to stop. I am not making her stop. I was the same kind of kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

For us, it was not worth it. My kids can all read music, but actually playing is not where their talent is, and that's totally okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

For us, it was not worth it. My kids can all read music, but actually playing is not where their talent is, and that's totally okay.

I barely can play piano any more after a few years of lessons. I am far from musically talented. But I'm glad I did it. I guess we have different definitions of "worth it." I think anything that builds skills and interests in my kids is worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

For us, it was not worth it. My kids can all read music, but actually playing is not where their talent is, and that's totally okay.

I seriously doubt that a kid who didn't study music can read music. Elementary schools introduce the concept, sure, but you have to actually practice the skill to be able to read music. My kids have been taking lessons for years and are still working on reading. The same with developing your ear and a sense of rhythm. It takes lots of practice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

For us, it was not worth it. My kids can all read music, but actually playing is not where their talent is, and that's totally okay.

I seriously doubt that a kid who didn't study music can read music. Elementary schools introduce the concept, sure, but you have to actually practice the skill to be able to read music. My kids have been taking lessons for years and are still working on reading. The same with developing your ear and a sense of rhythm. It takes lots of practice.

Read again, but slower. They can call read music (attending church regularly and using a hymnal helps), but aren't very good at making their hands do what the instrument needs to sound good. Those are two different skills, you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Totally disagree on the bolded. Basic skills on an instrument, reading music, and understanding music a little are valuable life skills.

For us, it was not worth it. My kids can all read music, but actually playing is not where their talent is, and that's totally okay.

I seriously doubt that a kid who didn't study music can read music. Elementary schools introduce the concept, sure, but you have to actually practice the skill to be able to read music. My kids have been taking lessons for years and are still working on reading. The same with developing your ear and a sense of rhythm. It takes lots of practice.

Read again, but slower. They can all read music (attending church regularly and using a hymnal helps), but aren't very good at making their hands do what the instrument needs to sound good. Those are two different skills, you know.

Kids singing from a hymnal in church are not reading music. They're reading the words and following others. You are far, far over estimating their skills.

[Anonymous]

For us, Boy Scouts was worth it. All the way to Eagle Scout. Lots of different skills and experiences obtained.

That, and our church youth group.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:swimming: worth it
violin: not worth it
piano: not worth it
French: not worth it
sailing: worth it
cross-country: worth it
flight lessons: worth it

Ok can I come in that tiny little bubble of yours