What’s really worth it during the elementary years?

[Anonymous]

If you have older kids or have been through the elementary years already, what activities, sports, or outside enrichment have been truly worth it, and why?

There is so much my child is interested in and it’s not reasonable to do it all. STEM class, math, language school, piano, nature sessions, Zoom class, multiple sports leagues, sports camps.

I wonder when I look back several years from now if I will wish I had done it differently and pushed focus on just one or two things year after year. Right now I’m just following enthusiastic child’s changing interests and doing as much as we can fit in without going crazy with driving or cutting into sleep and family time.

[Anonymous]

One thing that's NOT worth it is the birthday parties. Go if you're free, but don’t twist yourself in knots to make one unless it’s a very best friend. Even then, many ES very best friends are friendly acquaintances by HS.

[Anonymous]

Math, foreign language, sports. Very happy that they keep active even though they are far from the best. At times I felt bad when the good at sports kids showed up and left them out. But they keep kicking that ball even if it's against the wall!

[Anonymous]

Education first
Music lessons any instruction
After that nothing else

Let your kid lead pick one thing a semester

Out the money in an account for your kid and skip all the crazy believe me my kids were super happy upon graduation from college the trusts we set up they didn’t know about

[Anonymous]

2 activities max (per kid). Downtime, family time, and not being accustomed to every hour of your life being occupied by some activity are all valuable and important and the more activities you cram in, the lower ROI on any of them AND you sacrifice these very important aspects of life.

[Anonymous]

This varies from family to family. Our kid has an Arabic tutor twice a week and goes to the mosque school on Sundays. That’s worth it for us. We try to do one sport for two seasons and take him swimming in the summer. We have had a few home birthday parties. This year he can have a friend over or go to a fun place with a friend. I’m done hosting birthday parties. It’s too much work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Education first
Music lessons any instruction
After that nothing else

Let your kid lead pick one thing a semester

Out the money in an account for your kid and skip all the crazy believe me my kids were super happy upon graduation from college the trusts we set up they didn’t know about

This is so strangely specific. Why does music count, but not any sort of physical activity? Or foreign language, or chess, or any number of valuable skills that a grown adult could have?

OP I'm in the same boat so I have no advice. We're running ourselves a bit ragged trying to keep up with our kids' interests so I'm similarly trying to cut down. But it's hard to know what to keep.

My philosophy for now has been one physical activity / sport, and one intellectually challenging activity (Spanish, music, etc). But even then my kids are having a hard time picking.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you are doing it right. This is the time to explore different activities and encourage interests.

Yes, as time goes on, you want to try to focus a bit more. As they get older, each activity takes up more time. Try to gauge what they are good at and what really interests them.

Your own experiences, resources, and opinions can play into this decision as well.

Being more musical works for some families and those who love watching performances in the evenings. Others love early weekend mornings and being outdoors- some people really do not that!

Say your kid loves cheer the most, and basketball second, but is really more talented in basketball. Your town does not have a well-developed cheer program and you worry about injuries. The basketball team often wins State and sends kids to great college programs. Maybe scholarships are not an issue for you- maybe they are a huge issue. Perhaps you stick with both of these through MS before you make your final decisions, and as you consider all this.

Sometimes your kid can be on a sports team with kids that don't care at all about academics, and you see this influence affecting your kid- but their peers from the school musical are really kind and encouraging. IMHO parents should observe and do some nudging. But that's me! Maybe that's not you. People do things differently.

What I am trying to say is that it is highly personal and there are so many factors involved. In elementary, a lot of exposure is good, but pay attention to the decisions you will need to make as a family as they get older. Best of luck.

[Anonymous]

Early elementary one activity per season, max.

We value and prioritize unstructured play time outside of school and time outside in addition to having a fairly flexible schedule for whatever we want to do.

[Anonymous]

Personally, I’ve let my kids try anything they’ve expressed interest in.

We only continue things they’re willing to work on themselves, without prompting, on their own.

[Anonymous]

Sport is a priority, because a lifelong habit of regular exercise is so important for health.

Then math, because a strong foundation in elementary school math is essential for getting through life.

[Anonymous]

Spending time with animals. For my kid it's her horse.
Spending time on the water. My kid sails.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you have older kids or have been through the elementary years already, what activities, sports, or outside enrichment have been truly worth it, and why?

There is so much my child is interested in and it’s not reasonable to do it all. STEM class, math, language school, piano, nature sessions, Zoom class, multiple sports leagues, sports camps.

I wonder when I look back several years from now if I will wish I had done it differently and pushed focus on just one or two things year after year. Right now I’m just following enthusiastic child’s changing interests and doing as much as we can fit in without going crazy with driving or cutting into sleep and family time.

STEM class - nonsense, skipt it
math - if the kids is smart, do AOPS, otherwise skip
language school - do it online with a tutor, it's cheaper and easier
piano - big commitment, do it only if you they are gonna do it long term, start young
nature sessions - sounds like nonsense
zoom class - ???
sports - no idea, but i assume it's similar to music. you need to start early and stick to a single sport; otherwise it will eat a lot of resources and won't go anywhere

[Anonymous]

Swimming lessons mandatory until proficient- very important life skill.

Learn one musical instrument. Usually no need to start until the mid elementary years.

Try out several rec level team sports (whatever the kid seems interested in) but never more than one at a time. Don’t sacrifice family time for this, and don’t put your kid on any travel teams before 5th grade or so. They can specialize and/or move to travel teams in middle school. Usually the sports picture (interest level, enjoyment, talent level etc) becomes much clearer by then.

A little golf or tennis in the summer is helpful- lifelong sports. . Good to have some early exposure in case they become interested later on.

IMO academic enrichment is not necessary in elementary school unless the teacher indicates a problem area. That said- keep an eye out for after school academic clubs that might interest your kid.

[Anonymous]

Things that were worth it were academic enrichment (at home, not center-based tutoring), musical instrument lessons, volunteering a little bit at school, and maybe one inexpensive rec activity.

Things that were not worth it were elaborate birthday parties at a venue, social engineering and angling to make your kid be friends with the "right" kids, kissing up to teachers and admin, forcing sports on an unathletic child who is thin and healthy and already gets plenty of exercise.