What’s really worth it during the elementary years?

[Anonymous]

One sport per season
Regular 1:1 play dates
Summer camps

I’m probably in the minority here but I also think the elementary school aftercare programs are great. Built-in screen-free play dates with friends after school. Our aftercare organizes kickball games, crafts, dodgeball. Super fun. And easy on mom and dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One sport per season
Regular 1:1 play dates
Summer camps

I’m probably in the minority here but I also think the elementary school aftercare programs are great. Built-in screen-free play dates with friends after school. Our aftercare organizes kickball games, crafts, dodgeball. Super fun. And easy on mom and dad.

We are of the same mindset and I work a regular 9-5 job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sport is a priority, because a lifelong habit of regular exercise is so important for health.

Then math, because a strong foundation in elementary school math is essential for getting through life.

And then they end up obese adults I wonder wgy

People think childhood athletics is like a vaccine against adult weight gain. It's not. A lot of overweight adults are surprisingly active and spry for their age, but they also like donuts and pizza too much, so they don't stay slim. If you want your kids to be slim their whole lives, you also need to indoctrinate them about diet from an early age. And even that does not always work, people get to a certain age and they stop caring, no matter how deep the conditioning was. The best you can hope for is that they are slim and attractive in their 20s and 30s when they need to find a spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Music and at least one sport, at the young age trying various ones.

Also, family excursions like berry picking, the pumpkin patch, the petting zoo, aquarium. So much fun and before you know it, the kids won’t be into those activities any longer.

Lol I would absolutely put berry picking and pumpkin patch at the bottom of the list! We did that a couple times when kids were really little and it's a hassle and a rip off -- it's for people who want very specific photos to post to Instagram (that all look the same). It's like doing those "First Day of School" chalkboards. If you enjoy it and want to do it knock yourselves out but your children will not actually miss out on anything if you skip it.

Aquariums are great and I'd definitely do at least one trip to Disney (you don't have to go for a week -- suck it up for at least one day before your kids turn 8 or 9). We really valued museums and vacations and beaches. Tons of great memories at these places that are about more than checking off a box and getting a specific photo. And once kids are tweens they are less interested in doing that stuff with you and want to do it with friends or on their own so making those memories when they are little really means something (and they come back around in their 20s and actually want to do a weekend trip to SF or wander a museum with you again!).

Maybe berry picking for you was all about an “instagram photo” but it absolutely isnt for us (we don’t even have instagram). We love those experiences and wouldn’t take those memories back for anything! (And especially love the baking that followed!) We are absolutely not museum or beach people (boring!) I think the concept is the same really, family bonding out of the house itself and creating memories together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sport is a priority, because a lifelong habit of regular exercise is so important for health.

Then math, because a strong foundation in elementary school math is essential for getting through life.

And then they end up obese adults I wonder wgy

People think childhood athletics is like a vaccine against adult weight gain. It's not. A lot of overweight adults are surprisingly active and spry for their age, but they also like donuts and pizza too much, so they don't stay slim. If you want your kids to be slim their whole lives, you also need to indoctrinate them about diet from an early age. And even that does not always work, people get to a certain age and they stop caring, no matter how deep the conditioning was. The best you can hope for is that they are slim and attractive in their 20s and 30s when they need to find a spouse.

Couldn’t disagree more. Getting movement and fostering a love of activity is more important than “indoctrinating about diet”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One sport per season
Regular 1:1 play dates
Summer camps

I’m probably in the minority here but I also think the elementary school aftercare programs are great. Built-in screen-free play dates with friends after school. Our aftercare organizes kickball games, crafts, dodgeball. Super fun. And easy on mom and dad.

We are of the same mindset and I work a regular 9-5 job.

I think aftercare is great, unfortunately our school district doesn’t offer it!

[Anonymous]

Healthy and skinny are not the same things! People can be, and often are, thin and unhealthy. People can be, and often are, thick and healthy.

Exercise is good for everyone's health. Full stop. The goal isn't to be slim, it's to enjoy a long life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many people spend their lives schlepping their kids around to activities they don’t even enjoy or want to do. Talk to the high school kids in your lives many hated being over scheduled but never felt they could say no to their parents

And also talk to the high school kids who would haves loved to try regional orchestra or a club sport but their parents couldn’t be bothered to put in the effort to make it happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many people spend their lives schlepping their kids around to activities they don’t even enjoy or want to do. Talk to the high school kids in your lives many hated being over scheduled but never felt they could say no to their parents

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a high schooler now. He hated most organized activities as an elementary schooler. He’s very active and healthy and plays basketball now.

What is important:

-Swimming lessons
- Social skills, so lots of playdates and conversations with people of all ages
- General physical activity coordination - free play at the playground everyday taking risks, climbing trees and rocks, hiking, kicking or throwing a ball around with us
- Self expression, art and home cooking
- Autonomy by running small errands or going places on their own

That makes me feel better. I have a DD who just turned 7 and doesn’t like structured activities. We do swimming and occasionally dabble in other things, but I don’t force her into anything, though I wish she would show the same enthusiasm as other kids do! However, I do hit everything on your list. No independent errands yet, but independent chores, and I might start the errands in a year or two (we are walkable to a grocery store)

[Anonymous]

IMO, things that have been worth it:
—any active activity my kids have been willing to do. I have seen increased coordination and confidence come from practicing week after week. This includes things like bike riding and kicking a ball with parents
—heritage language school. It’s important to us as parents, so worth the schlep.
—anything a kid is truly interested in.

Things that have not been worth it for my family:
—anything I think sounds fun but that the kid isn’t interested in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early elementary one activity per season, max.

We value and prioritize unstructured play time outside of school and time outside in addition to having a fairly flexible schedule for whatever we want to do.

One activity at a time? I would like to know what your kid’s week looked like at 2nd- 4th grade! I don’t know anyone who only does even just 1 sport at a time.

Mine is:

Mon: free
Tue: piano lesson
Wed: sport practice or game
Thu: free
Fri:free
Sat: language class
Sat or Sun: sometimes a sport game

But no before care or aftercare, so at school 8-3pm and he gets picked up right away for sport or music.

That’s an easy schedule.

That is my point. And it’s 4 activities. I can’t see people doing just 1 activity per semester with all the enrichment and optimization going on.

It sounds like you’re a SAHM since you said no aftercare. Aftercare IS one of the activities if you’re a 2 working parent household. We can’t get to a 3 pm music class like you.

[Anonymous]

Our elementary schools let out fairly late, so we kept it to one rec sport and did swimming lessons in the summer (not year round).

Summer camp was a great time to try different things, like coding for instance - week-long coding camp doubled as childcare, whereas driving to a class during the school year would’ve been stressful (kid tired after school, me tired after work).

Once middle school hits, a lot more is attached to the school day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Healthy and skinny are not the same things! People can be, and often are, thin and unhealthy. People can be, and often are, thick and healthy.

Exercise is good for everyone's health. Full stop. The goal isn't to be slim, it's to enjoy a long life.

Shut up about full stop

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One sport per season
Regular 1:1 play dates
Summer camps

I’m probably in the minority here but I also think the elementary school aftercare programs are great. Built-in screen-free play dates with friends after school. Our aftercare organizes kickball games, crafts, dodgeball. Super fun. And easy on mom and dad.

Agree, SACC was great for our kids. (That said, I also tried to prioritize allowing friends over when possible, because I think they learn something from hosting, too.)