Boyfriend asked how I'd feel about dressing sexier

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This seems so strange to me - it sounds controlling. OTOH, OP seems willing and curious but clueless.

Hope it all works out and he doesn’t expect her to wear stuff she hates or is uncomfortable wearing.

Yeah, can’t shake the feeling this is controlling. Triggered. Hope I’m wrong. Have fun shopping, OP.

Yeah, it’s adjacent to ok but is hard to tell via the description.
Also can we Not encourage all the ladies to take their men shopping with them?
I like to buy my bras in peace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about buying one nice but not too fancy dress? Like a fitted Boden dress that flatters/gives some curves with a pair of wedge sandals ? I wear a lot of pants and sweaters but my spouse definitely appreciates when I kick it up a notch and put on a dress and show a little leg and cleavage without it being over the top SEXY, just more stereotypically feminine. Or go shopping with him and try stuff on!

Boden is not sexy.

If you sort Boden's dresses by length and choose "mini" they all hit right at the knee or right above the knee. That's not a true "mini dress." Biden is very conservative.

Lol!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about buying one nice but not too fancy dress? Like a fitted Boden dress that flatters/gives some curves with a pair of wedge sandals ? I wear a lot of pants and sweaters but my spouse definitely appreciates when I kick it up a notch and put on a dress and show a little leg and cleavage without it being over the top SEXY, just more stereotypically feminine. Or go shopping with him and try stuff on!

Boden is not sexy.

If you sort Boden's dresses by length and choose "mini" they all hit right at the knee or right above the knee. That's not a true "mini dress." Biden is very conservative.

Lol!

Oh , whoops!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What about buying one nice but not too fancy dress? Like a fitted Boden dress that flatters/gives some curves with a pair of wedge sandals ? I wear a lot of pants and sweaters but my spouse definitely appreciates when I kick it up a notch and put on a dress and show a little leg and cleavage without it being over the top SEXY, just more stereotypically feminine. Or go shopping with him and try stuff on!

Boden is not sexy.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=854782012&cid=13658&pcid=13658&vid=1&nav=hamnav%3AWomen%3ACategories%3ADresses&cpos=3&cexp=2859&kcid=CategoryIDs%3D13658&cvar=25411&ctype=Listing&cpid=res24031405824799505446478&ccam=31678#pdp-page-content

This would be sexy if you have a great body, which it sounds like you do

https://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=404556002&cid=13658&pcid=13658&vid=1&nav=hamnav%3AWomen%3ACategories%3ADresses&cpos=11&cexp=2859&kcid=CategoryIDs%3D13658&ctype=Listing&cpid=res24031405824799505446478&ccam=31678#pdp-page-content

And this is cute.

https://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=431154012&cid=13658&pcid=13658&vid=1&nav=hamnav%3AWomen%3ACategories%3ADresses&cpos=15&cexp=2859&kcid=CategoryIDs%3D13658&cvar=25411&ctype=Listing&cpid=res24031405824799505446478&ccam=31678#pdp-page-content

Both cute and sexy

Opinions of a middle aged woman.

Sorry no.
Gap and Ann Taylor are not sexy. JCrew is not sexy.
Those stores are filled with are preppy weekend mall shopping attire to casual office attire. And maybe the occasional brunch or resort outfit.
Talbots and Chicos and JJill are all classy but not sexy older women 55+ attire. Talbots tries with younger models but that look can only be pulled off it you’re going to tea at the country club or attending a wedding or baby shower, honestly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This seems so strange to me - it sounds controlling. OTOH, OP seems willing and curious but clueless.

Hope it all works out and he doesn’t expect her to wear stuff she hates or is uncomfortable wearing.

Yeah, can’t shake the feeling this is controlling. Triggered. Hope I’m wrong. Have fun shopping, OP.

+1

My dad asked my mom to dress sexier, and it really weighed on her to the point that it was detrimental to the marriage. I will never forget how it made her feel (and how it made me feel, as a teenager, to hear that. I clearly felt like my dad was equating "sexy" with "value".)

[Anonymous]

OP, for the love of God, if you actually are 25, please ignore all these suggestions and just take your friend/coworker to the mall. This forum will have you dressed like a homely consultant.

[Anonymous]

I would tell him to go ahead and dress sexy and look forward to whatever he decides to wear!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so strange to me - it sounds controlling. OTOH, OP seems willing and curious but clueless.

Hope it all works out and he doesn’t expect her to wear stuff she hates or is uncomfortable wearing.

Yeah, can’t shake the feeling this is controlling. Triggered. Hope I’m wrong. Have fun shopping, OP.

+1

My dad asked my mom to dress sexier, and it really weighed on her to the point that it was detrimental to the marriage. I will never forget how it made her feel (and how it made me feel, as a teenager, to hear that. I clearly felt like my dad was equating "sexy" with "value".)

Please consider the issue is your parents. There is no world in which a child should hear about her father’s request and her mother’s emotional reaction about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems so strange to me - it sounds controlling. OTOH, OP seems willing and curious but clueless.

Hope it all works out and he doesn’t expect her to wear stuff she hates or is uncomfortable wearing.

Yeah, can’t shake the feeling this is controlling. Triggered. Hope I’m wrong. Have fun shopping, OP.

Yeah, it’s adjacent to ok but is hard to tell via the description.
Also can we Not encourage all the ladies to take their men shopping with them?
I like to buy my bras in peace.

If they have been dating for a while and have a good relationship I think that shopping together would be super cute and fun! Just imagine it in a rom com.

I also suspect that this guy is a little controlling, and OP seems clueless, like she can't imagine that she should do anything but do what this guy wants. But if she's going to go down the route of changing her appearance to please her man, I actually think making him pay for it puts them on slightly more equal footing. Plus she doesn't have to just hope that this guy likes what she buys, she'll know from the get-go and it'll save her time.

[Anonymous]

I'd shop for a new boyfriend.