PSA to parents of college kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody seems to care because you think they don’t issue citations (sometimes with court dates), think about this: if your kid handles the citation on their own (easy to do: pay and/or knock out the community service), they aren’t likely to understand that the item will appear in a background check…which is why you need to follow up to have it removed.

All I’m suggesting is that you discuss this with your kid. Make sure you have visibility if there are any issues so you can handle it.

More directly: you don’t want to discover this on a grad school/bar exam/job security clearance check.

I think this is good advice, but quit insisting everyone has one, and we're duped if we say our kid doesn't. My kid doesn't. She is more of an old lady than I am! She works the granny chic, though.

+1. I was a total hermit in college. Never drank, never went to bars, would not have dreamed of having a fake ID.

Good post, though. Just don't presume that every kids is doing this. They're not.

Neither of mine have them: less than half have one at their ivies. Frats and social clubs have drinks if the kids want to drink and 21yo upperclassmen get it for the groups . About 25% of undergrads at both places don’t drink. It is less alcohol focused than when I was a student and I did not have a fake either nor did any of my close friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So ridiculous that 18 year olds can’t drink legally.

This would create an easy supply for high school parties. I say 19.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well…I just found out my kid got a fake one for $40. I am quite upset, feel disappointed and angry at the same time. Kid will be a frshman in Aug. at a college rhat is half and hour away from home. I fantasize changing plans and have her stay at home instead. I know, I know…”but the college experience” 🤦🏻‍♀️
Ugh.😣

Welcome to college! My dd got one right before freshman year too along with her roommate and a bunch of kids who ordered in one big group. At their school, if you didn’t have a fake, you were kind of an outcast. She survived, is 21 now, and really doesn’t drink so it doesn’t mean your dd is going to become an alcoholic or something. It’s just a way to be social. I told her everything that could happen, but she seemed to know the tricks and that the bouncer would just turn her away if he didn’t believe her. Nothing I could do since I knew she’d just order another one.

[Anonymous]

I had a "real" ID - it just wasn't mine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody seems to care because you think they don’t issue citations (sometimes with court dates), think about this: if your kid handles the citation on their own (easy to do: pay and/or knock out the community service), they aren’t likely to understand that the item will appear in a background check…which is why you need to follow up to have it removed.

All I’m suggesting is that you discuss this with your kid. Make sure you have visibility if there are any issues so you can handle it.

More directly: you don’t want to discover this on a grad school/bar exam/job security clearance check.

I think this is good advice, but quit insisting everyone has one, and we're duped if we say our kid doesn't. My kid doesn't. She is more of an old lady than I am! She works the granny chic, though.

+1. I was a total hermit in college. Never drank, never went to bars, would not have dreamed of having a fake ID.

Good post, though. Just don't presume that every kids is doing this. They're not.

Bless your heart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The drinking age should really be 18.

I grew up in Arizona. They lowered the drinking age to 19 in 1972 due to the argument "if you can be drafted to fight in Vietnam, you should be allowed to drink." There followed ten years of significant increase in traffic accidents and resulting deaths, and as a result they raised it back to 21 in 1985. Many other states raised their drinking age in the 1980s for the same reason.

States raised the age to get federal highway dollars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So ridiculous that 18 year olds can’t drink legally.

This would create an easy supply for high school parties. I say 19.

Are this generation's high school parties dry?

[Anonymous]

This generation also all smoke dope and vape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody seems to care because you think they don’t issue citations (sometimes with court dates), think about this: if your kid handles the citation on their own (easy to do: pay and/or knock out the community service), they aren’t likely to understand that the item will appear in a background check…which is why you need to follow up to have it removed.

All I’m suggesting is that you discuss this with your kid. Make sure you have visibility if there are any issues so you can handle it.

More directly: you don’t want to discover this on a grad school/bar exam/job security clearance check.

I think this is good advice, but quit insisting everyone has one, and we're duped if we say our kid doesn't. My kid doesn't. She is more of an old lady than I am! She works the granny chic, though.

+1. I was a total hermit in college. Never drank, never went to bars, would not have dreamed of having a fake ID.

Good post, though. Just don't presume that every kids is doing this. They're not.

Bless your heart.

DP here. My parents, who were partiers in their youth, assumed I was doing all of these things (and wouldn't have minded) except that I wasn't. At all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are concerned about the wrong things OP.

The law that raised the drinking age to 21 has been very rigorously evaluated, and it has saved the lives of thousands and thousands of kids.

Whether that is intuitive to you or not, it has been proven without a doubt.

???

I’m not the one arguing to lower the drinking age.

Rather, I’m trying to tell parents that even the straight-edge bookish kids have a fake ID…or will get one at college. And even if they are just using it to get inside a bar, they could end up with a citation, court date, etc.

Moreover: they could end up with something on their record without realizing it.

Don’t shoot the messenger.

ICYMI: there are some rather entrepreneurial kids at area private and public schools making money from selling them…and all the kids have them.

So, was this bar raided by the cops?

Just trying to better understand the PSA...I gather this is not a bouncer calling the cops on you because you have a fake ID, but rather a planned raid by the cops...probably because the bar has some notoriety of allowing underage kids?

At my college "back in the day," the would raid the bars just before the Policemen's Ball to raise the funds to pay for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody seems to care because you think they don’t issue citations (sometimes with court dates), think about this: if your kid handles the citation on their own (easy to do: pay and/or knock out the community service), they aren’t likely to understand that the item will appear in a background check…which is why you need to follow up to have it removed.

All I’m suggesting is that you discuss this with your kid. Make sure you have visibility if there are any issues so you can handle it.

More directly: you don’t want to discover this on a grad school/bar exam/job security clearance check.

You should be aware that it is not uncommon for the questions to be worded such that you must also disclose violations that were "removed."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never had a fake ID. My student will barely be allowed off campus.

Who is "allowing" your adult student's movements on and off campus?

The school itself.

Let me guess.

A Service Academy.

Just remember, even they are good at improvise, adapt, and overcome.

Sure. But how's he going to get it, steal it from the exchange during the free time he doesn't have? Doesn't matter. Like I said, I never had a fake ID, and this kid in particular knows how lucky he was to be admitted and doesn't want to screw that up. And FWIW, the military has really cracked down and on smoking and drinking in recent years - you can't even buy liquor at most NEX Mini-Marts anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank you, op. I hadn’t thought of this and it’s good advice.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The drinking age should really be 18.

I grew up in Arizona. They lowered the drinking age to 19 in 1972 due to the argument "if you can be drafted to fight in Vietnam, you should be allowed to drink." There followed ten years of significant increase in traffic accidents and resulting deaths, and as a result they raised it back to 21 in 1985. Many other states raised their drinking age in the 1980s for the same reason.

Weren't all states required to raise it to 21 around 1984 or so--or they would lose some type of funding?

Yes, a measure to keep kids alive. Amen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well…I just found out my kid got a fake one for $40. I am quite upset, feel disappointed and angry at the same time. Kid will be a frshman in Aug. at a college rhat is half and hour away from home. I fantasize changing plans and have her stay at home instead. I know, I know…”but the college experience” 🤦🏻‍♀️
Ugh.😣

Welcome to college! My dd got one right before freshman year too along with her roommate and a bunch of kids who ordered in one big group. At their school, if you didn’t have a fake, you were kind of an outcast. She survived, is 21 now, and really doesn’t drink so it doesn’t mean your dd is going to become an alcoholic or something. It’s just a way to be social. I told her everything that could happen, but she seemed to know the tricks and that the bouncer would just turn her away if he didn’t believe her. Nothing I could do since I knew she’d just order another one.

Exactly. why is this a big deal???