Marrying for lifestyle not love as smart choice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The cost of being married to someone you don't love seems so much higher than the cost of being married to someone who isn't rich.

Hahaha The easiest way to fall out of love with someone is to have to deal with debt and live in a cruddy apartment that you need a second job to afford.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do know one person who did this and it did not go well. She married for wealth and that alone really. She had the kids, then got bored and blew it all up by cheating on him in the most insane and obvious way. From the outside it doesn't make sense because this guy was loaded, good looking and generally pretty decent! But he let her call all the shots, and she lost respect for him I think.

But now she's bummed because she's "poor" and only living on $10k a month. Who knows if she regrets it or not...

Watching my neighbors blow up their marriage right now. Some variation of “I am realizing that life is too short to not be with someone who leaves you weak in the knees and breathless.” Pretty sure somebody has now found love but not with her husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The cost of being married to someone you don't love seems so much higher than the cost of being married to someone who isn't rich.

Hahaha The easiest way to fall out of love with someone is to have to deal with debt and live in a cruddy apartment that you need a second job to afford.

Actually living this. It’s a nightmare. It’s killed the love that brought us together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've never met a woman who claimed to marry for lifestyle, I would be shocked to hear it!

I have a friend who did. Her DH travels for work and cheats on her left, right and center and she looks the other way because she likes the lifestyle. No kids yet.

Does the cheating upset your friend at all? She is open with you about the cheating?

I’ve known her since high school and yes, she’s been open with me about the cheating. She isn’t thrilled about it but I think has sort of made her peace with it and accepted that it comes with the territory (her husband is tall, reasonably good looking and charismatic, and travels on business multiple times a year… and I can’t say I disagree with her that pretty much all those guys cheat). She’s never been the hopeless romantic type and dated strategically to secure the bag. She’s very pretty but grew up very middle class so it’s not like there were tons of rich guys in her orbit to choose from… otherwise maybe she’d have held out for a better love match who was also rich, who knows. They don’t have kids yet so I don’t know if or how that will change anything. For now she seems… content, but I wouldn’t say happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I married for love and made my own money.

+1. The only women who marry for life style are those that cant make money themselves.

I have never met a woman who enjoyed taking care of a man financially. It gets too close to a mommy relationship and kills the attraction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the women I know who did this seem so much happier than the ones who married for love but now have to work like crazy. Were the rest of us just huge dummies?

By lifestyle do you not working a full time job and career?

Or you do work but realized early on the only thing the guy was good for is just making money and hiring someone to do all the other things he should also be doing? That lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've never met a woman who claimed to marry for lifestyle, I would be shocked to hear it!

I have a friend who did. Her DH travels for work and cheats on her left, right and center and she looks the other way because she likes the lifestyle. No kids yet.

Does the cheating upset your friend at all? She is open with you about the cheating?

I’ve known her since high school and yes, she’s been open with me about the cheating. She isn’t thrilled about it but I think has sort of made her peace with it and accepted that it comes with the territory (her husband is tall, reasonably good looking and charismatic, and travels on business multiple times a year… and I can’t say I disagree with her that pretty much all those guys cheat). She’s never been the hopeless romantic type and dated strategically to secure the bag. She’s very pretty but grew up very middle class so it’s not like there were tons of rich guys in her orbit to choose from… otherwise maybe she’d have held out for a better love match who was also rich, who knows. They don’t have kids yet so I don’t know if or how that will change anything. For now she seems… content, but I wouldn’t say happy.

She sounds tragic.

And I would be suicidal if I had her future ahead of me.

(Why didn’t she just work hard in school , and secure her own future??)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I married for love and made my own money.

+1. The only women who marry for life style are those that cant make money themselves.

I have never met a woman who enjoyed taking care of a man financially. It gets too close to a mommy relationship and kills the attraction.

Yes much better to have a breadwinner DH, just like their dad’s paying for all the bills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The cost of being married to someone you don't love seems so much higher than the cost of being married to someone who isn't rich.

This. Nearly all the divorces in my tiny all girls’ HS class are women who married “up” into the UC or married laterally to a climber in the UMC. None of the women who married down are divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The cost of being married to someone you don't love seems so much higher than the cost of being married to someone who isn't rich.

This. Nearly all the divorces in my tiny all girls’ HS class are women who married “up” into the UC or married laterally to a climber in the UMC. None of the women who married down are divorced.

Is it because they can’t afford to divorce or because they don’t want to? There’s a difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well I married for love but over time stayed for lifestyle because my picker was not good. Lots of emotional abuse over the years. Eventually had to get out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The cost of being married to someone you don't love seems so much higher than the cost of being married to someone who isn't rich.

Hahaha The easiest way to fall out of love with someone is to have to deal with debt and live in a cruddy apartment that you need a second job to afford.

You are there because you too can't earn enough to afford a better house. He too would be better off with a wealthy partner. No?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do know one person who did this and it did not go well. She married for wealth and that alone really. She had the kids, then got bored and blew it all up by cheating on him in the most insane and obvious way. From the outside it doesn't make sense because this guy was loaded, good looking and generally pretty decent! But he let her call all the shots, and she lost respect for him I think.

But now she's bummed because she's "poor" and only living on $10k a month. Who knows if she regrets it or not...

Watching my neighbors blow up their marriage right now. Some variation of “I am realizing that life is too short to not be with someone who leaves you weak in the knees and breathless.” Pretty sure somebody has now found love but not with her husband

There is more to love than weak knees and breathlessness. He should be your lifelong support and fresh air if you can't stand or breathe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is comes down to is women are lazy, and they love spending money they didn't earn.

GFY, Incel

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only women who are truly happy got both. Those lucky b's are few and far between.

Some of us are just more easily content. I got love (not so much romance), a “family man” and an upper middle class lifestyle. Some women on here would not be content but I am quite.