Anecdotal or is the AP always less attractive than the spouse?

[Anonymous]

From what I have observed, it’s a mixed bag. Sometimes it’s really a bad marriage and the guy is looking for more of a relationship. In my case, I would say the affair partner my husband had was equally as attractive but very different looking. We shouldn’t have married in the first place. (Not excusing his behavior, but it is true.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:APs are typically younger than spouses but less attractive than spouses were at that age.

25 y/o AP > 45 y/o DW
But

25 y/o AP < DW at 25

I think it is frequently an issue of socioeconomics rather than looks. Of course youth is beauty and trumps all, but it is more likely that AP and DW were of equal attractiveness- one just had the benefit of birth to a UMC family and exposure to upwardly mobile men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My AP would be considered by many to be less attractive than my ex but my AP had a brain, a sense of humor and a glow of kindness that emanated from her which made her 10,000 times more attractive than my ex.

Nothing like screwing someone else’s husband to give you that “glow of kindness!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just thinking of recent high profile affairs in the news - past and present - but Benjamin millipied, david Beckham, schwartzneggers housekeeper, Sergei brins wife….
All their aps were less attractive than their spouse. Is there a pattern? Is this always the way?

This is what happens when men don't have the guts to marry the women they're actually attracted to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just thinking of recent high profile affairs in the news - past and present - but Benjamin millipied, david Beckham, schwartzneggers housekeeper, Sergei brins wife….
All their aps were less attractive than their spouse. Is there a pattern? Is this always the way?

This is what happens when men don't have the guts to marry the women they're actually attracted to.

Give me a break. Beckham was head over heels for Beyoncé- so was Jay-Z with Beyoncé, etc.

Men don’t have to settle. They can have babies at 80 years old and earn enough $.

Women will settle. Men don’t.

[Anonymous]

^ Beckham for Posh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just thinking of recent high profile affairs in the news - past and present - but Benjamin millipied, david Beckham, schwartzneggers housekeeper, Sergei brins wife….
All their aps were less attractive than their spouse. Is there a pattern? Is this always the way?

This is what happens when men don't have the guts to marry the women they're actually attracted to.

No. Those men treated the APs like garbage and pumped and dumped. They had zero intention of anything more than a screw.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:APs are typically younger than spouses but less attractive than spouses were at that age.

25 y/o AP > 45 y/o DW
But

25 y/o AP < DW at 25

I think it is frequently an issue of socioeconomics rather than looks. Of course youth is beauty and trumps all, but it is more likely that AP and DW were of equal attractiveness- one just had the benefit of birth to a UMC family and exposure to upwardly mobile men.

Birth to an umc? So we are to assume they are White? And the ap is what? A struggling black or Latin woman?

[Anonymous]

Most of your neighborhood, dive bar or cubicle affairs are a downward choice, to hook up with someone new who doesn't give you a hard time about taking out the garbage or attending your kid's music recital.

But in some circles, it's a credential, a calling card, a badge of honor to have a hot and polished AP. You really have to grow up or immerse yourself in the highest circles of society to understand this.

High-level finance and tech outfits were mentioned previously. You see the presence of an AP expected in entertainment at a high level (film and TV producers, high-level agents, studio executives, etc.). Politicos at a very high level such as members of Congress and Cabinet-level officials. Elite medical professionals and researchers. Rainmaker partners in Biglaw and in consulting firms.

There's just a lot said for doing business with someone who can attract someone elite to be by his side when the hard work ends and it's time to play hard. The people who can bring in an AP like that are also the ones most capable of making the deals that generate eyepopping dollars. The APs see the same thing that we see in the elites of society. It's just that these APs have elite charms of their own, so much so that they reflect well on their patrons and make them feel amazing when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of your neighborhood, dive bar or cubicle affairs are a downward choice, to hook up with someone new who doesn't give you a hard time about taking out the garbage or attending your kid's music recital.

But in some circles, it's a credential, a calling card, a badge of honor to have a hot and polished AP. You really have to grow up or immerse yourself in the highest circles of society to understand this.

High-level finance and tech outfits were mentioned previously. You see the presence of an AP expected in entertainment at a high level (film and TV producers, high-level agents, studio executives, etc.). Politicos at a very high level such as members of Congress and Cabinet-level officials. Elite medical professionals and researchers. Rainmaker partners in Biglaw and in consulting firms.

There's just a lot said for doing business with someone who can attract someone elite to be by his side when the hard work ends and it's time to play hard. The people who can bring in an AP like that are also the ones most capable of making the deals that generate eyepopping dollars. The APs see the same thing that we see in the elites of society. It's just that these APs have elite charms of their own, so much so that they reflect well on their patrons and make them feel amazing when the time comes.

This sounds like fan fiction. Are these hot and polished APs and elite politicos in the room with us right now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:APs are typically younger than spouses but less attractive than spouses were at that age.

25 y/o AP > 45 y/o DW
But

25 y/o AP < DW at 25

I think it is frequently an issue of socioeconomics rather than looks. Of course youth is beauty and trumps all, but it is more likely that AP and DW were of equal attractiveness- one just had the benefit of birth to a UMC family and exposure to upwardly mobile men.

Birth to an umc? So we are to assume they are White? And the ap is what? A struggling black or Latin woman?

Well, that’s quite the long jump, but it is true that their is a race gap in assortative mating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:APs are typically younger than spouses but less attractive than spouses were at that age.

25 y/o AP > 45 y/o DW
But

25 y/o AP < DW at 25

I think it is frequently an issue of socioeconomics rather than looks. Of course youth is beauty and trumps all, but it is more likely that AP and DW were of equal attractiveness- one just had the benefit of birth to a UMC family and exposure to upwardly mobile men.

Birth to an umc? So we are to assume they are White? And the ap is what? A struggling black or Latin woman?

Well, that’s quite the long jump, but it is true that their is a race gap in assortative mating.

^ *there