DH lost job again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Honestly I am thinking about moving to a low COL area. I work remote so that shouldn’t be an issue. I am burnt out with this situation.

Would be a wise choice, OP. Any low COL where you might have family or social support?

That would be in Europe. So I am thinking either a smaller town with good public schools around Boston, or Europe. Not sure I can do my job from Europe. I might have to find a new one (which would be bad because I like my job).

Definitely not lower COL.

I'm very sorry, OP.

+2

OP. Definitely cheaper than where I live now. Not Brookline or the likes, more like 40-60 minutes out. As I said, I am fully remote, so wouldn’t have to commute into Boston.

You are going to have sticker shock.

Sounds like OP has already scoped out home prices in that area- have you? I think the "further out" options from Boston are a lot better than around here, especially if no one has to commute*. The towns are more established with more interesting housing stock than all the manufactured sprawl in this area.

*I'm guessing OP assumes that her DH will not get a another job

Very familiar with those prices, and OP will have sticker shock.

+1. My friend recently bought a 3BR in Beverly for around $600k, which is like 45 min from city- not cheap! OP if you want to go low COL, you need to go truly low COL- like Syracuse or something. You can find some good school districts in upstate NY too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the sole breadwinner for many years and after a short reprieve, I am back in this unfortunate position. I don’t even know what to think or do. It really put such a strain on me, financially, mentally etc. I just can’t go through it anymore.

When women are sole breadwinners, it’s a crisis, but when men are sole breadwinners it’s SAHM time.

Men who are unemployed rarely make dinner, clean the house and take on the mental load of caring for kids (doctors/dentists/activities/playdates) and family social obligations.

An unemployed man is a crisis because he doesn’t contribute financially or to household management.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the sole breadwinner for many years and after a short reprieve, I am back in this unfortunate position. I don’t even know what to think or do. It really put such a strain on me, financially, mentally etc. I just can’t go through it anymore.

When women are sole breadwinners, it’s a crisis, but when men are sole breadwinners it’s SAHM time.

Men who are unemployed rarely make dinner, clean the house and take on the mental load of caring for kids (doctors/dentists/activities/playdates) and family social obligations.

An unemployed man is a crisis because he doesn’t contribute financially or to household management.

This

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was the sole breadwinner for many years and after a short reprieve, I am back in this unfortunate position. I don’t even know what to think or do. It really put such a strain on me, financially, mentally etc. I just can’t go through it anymore.

When women are sole breadwinners, it’s a crisis, but when men are sole breadwinners it’s SAHM time.

Men who are unemployed rarely make dinner, clean the house and take on the mental load of caring for kids (doctors/dentists/activities/playdates) and family social obligations.

An unemployed man is a crisis because he doesn’t contribute financially or to household management.

What is a man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op I’m so sorry. I have been you. I wish I could give you a hug. It’s so so so upsetting.

Last time this happened to my dh I gave him a timeline to find a new job (I gave him 4.5 mos) and I said if you have not found one by then we need to separate. Your dh has got to be able to work, unless you are happy for him to sah. Maybe a deadline will help him. Also tell us the root cause. Mine has adhd so deadlines help him

4.5 months? Lol, so glad I'm not married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I am thinking about moving to a low COL area. I work remote so that shouldn’t be an issue. I am burnt out with this situation.

Would be a wise choice, OP. Any low COL where you might have family or social support?

That would be in Europe. So I am thinking either a smaller town with good public schools around Boston, or Europe. Not sure I can do my job from Europe. I might have to find a new one (which would be bad because I like my job).

Definitely not lower COL.

I'm very sorry, OP.

+2

OP. Definitely cheaper than where I live now. Not Brookline or the likes, more like 40-60 minutes out. As I said, I am fully remote, so wouldn’t have to commute into Boston.

You are going to have sticker shock.

Sounds like OP has already scoped out home prices in that area- have you? I think the "further out" options from Boston are a lot better than around here, especially if no one has to commute*. The towns are more established with more interesting housing stock than all the manufactured sprawl in this area.

*I'm guessing OP assumes that her DH will not get a another job

Very familiar with those prices, and OP will have sticker shock.

+1. My friend recently bought a 3BR in Beverly for around $600k, which is like 45 min from city- not cheap! OP if you want to go low COL, you need to go truly low COL- like Syracuse or something. You can find some good school districts in upstate NY too.

+2. But I think she’ll need to be somewhere less desirable than Syracuse. Like rural Midwest.