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I will add- if she has in fact also lost a child, and she is saying this pain is no less for her, then I agree with you. It’s mind boggling but you’re right , it is her experience and everyone is entitled to their own feelings and experiences.
But if she did not lose a child, and she still is comparing losing a dog as equal to losing a child, then she is in fact absolutely comparing her pain to that of a mother losing her child. Because she certainly isn’t comparing it to the pain of losing her own child, so, then whose pain is she saying it is equal to? A mothers pain. |
+1000 |
Yes, she was talking about how she felt. She felt the same pain as if it were a human family member. She’s relaying her experience. It doesn’t have to be the same as your experience or mine or anyone else’s. |
Why do you think you know more about how she experienced loss than she does? She’s saying she couldn’t have hurt more if it had been her literal child. Maybe that’s true, maybe she’s off base, but she’s in a better position to judge her emotional state than you are. |
I feel so sorry for your children. |
Because she is saying it hurts just as bad as a mother losing a child, without having experienced losing a child! Which is breathtakingly insulting to mothers on this site who have watched their children die. I can say “my stubbed toe hurts just as bad as having my appendix removed without anesthesia” , but if I’ve never actually experienced the latter, the comparison is not “my own feelings/ my own emotions”, because I’m talking out of my ass. “It’s the most pain I’ve ever felt” would be much more valid here. Because you’re no longer comparing losing your dog to a mother losing her child. You’re sticking strictly to your own experience. |
| I dare the one PP to attend the funeral of some 4 year old baby and hug the grieving mother and say “I know just how you feel. My dog died last week.” |
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This argument is so pointless and mean minded too. You ladies want to hold out some kind of moral superiority for the way you love your children and are acting as though you are blind to the obvious reality that billions of people don’t love their kids all that much or else we wouldn’t have billions of abused and formerly abused children walking this earth.
‘Love’ is a feeling created by hormones and neurons in a complex reaction in the human brain. There is nothing moral about it. Of course humans can experience the same exact complex reaction in their brains about animals or other humans unrelated to them etc. Just like spawning doesn’t automatically compel a human to healthy parenting, it doesn’t automatically confer a greater capacity for experiencing ‘love’ in the human brain than exists in human brains whose bodies never spawn. All certitude to the contrary is just made up social convention BS, no matter how vehemently you believe it or preach it. Science, ladies. |
👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽Exactly this. A lot of the mothers on this website have this inherent need to use their motherhood as a throne upon which they sit and judge other women. It reeks of insecurity, and it’s just stupid. |
There are parents who don’t give a shit about their kids. There are pet owners who are deeply bonded to their pets. We all can only speak about our own feelings. My guess is that pp was hurting more when her dog died than Lori Vallow Daybell was when her kids died, but who really knows? |
For. Her. That is the case for her. Period. Her beliefs about her own feelings is no reflection on you or your child or other mothers. |
You flat out cannot say “X feels the same as Y” without having experienced Y. This holds true for all life experiences. |
You don’t even know what you’re arguing against now. She said…
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“My sadness and pain is no less …. THAN IF SHE WERE A HUMAN CHILD… because she was a dog”.
That is what she is saying because that’s what the question in the OP is (do you love your kids more than your dog) And you continue to argue in her favor and say that this is just her personal experience. Lol. I guess if her personal experience involves both her child and her dog dying in a house fire and she grieved them equally , then, of course. Otherwise she is making a comparison where she has zero experience in the matter. |
You can’t be reasoned with. I’m tapping out of this one. I’ll see you in next year’s “Happy Mother’s Day Pet Mom’s” thread. I’ll be the one making fun of your complaints and tears. |