Boyfriend didn't get me a v day gift

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend of 7 months didn't get me a Valentine's gift. I gave him a nice sweater and he gave me nada. We spoke about this ahead of time. I told him celebrating was important to me, we agreed to exchange gifts and nothing. We are happy outside of this. Long term this would bother me. Is this a stupid reason to break up?

Gift and a made up holiday aren't important but wishes of a sweetheart are. Even if he didn't have time or money to shop, he could've made a card or popped in a 7-11 for some inexpensive chocolates. You are dating, not 10 year married.

I am stuck in the house due to an injury. I couldn't get out to get a card, so I took a selfie in lingerie, edited it on an app to add text and turned it into a Valentine's card. Where there is a will there is a way.

Yes, it was an extremely low bar and OP's bf could not clear it. Does not bode well for the future

[Anonymous]

Is he broke?

[Anonymous]

You communicated your wishes, he agreed to do something, and then he dropped the ball and offered no reason. There is no excuse for his behavior. I would just ask him directly what happened and be prepared to dump him when he disappoints you further with his response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend of 7 months didn't get me a Valentine's gift. I gave him a nice sweater and he gave me nada. We spoke about this ahead of time. I told him celebrating was important to me, we agreed to exchange gifts and nothing. We are happy outside of this. Long term this would bother me. Is this a stupid reason to break up?

OP, you are rather transparent here. A sweater is your idea of a VD gift for a guy? No. His mom or granny gets him sweaters.

A gf gets herself some sexy lingerie and then uses it with the bf and THAT is his VD gift.

Meanwhile, you angling for more than a teddy bear. Most likely, you hinted at expensive jewelry.

You tried to play him for a fool but played yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems manipulative and cruel to agree to exchange gifts, accept someone’s gift, and not have anything in return. Dump him.

OP did not actually convey the actual conversation wih her bf which she claims is when he agreed to buy her anything.

Because it was probably something far more ambiguous.

OP: "I think it is important to give gifts to each other on VD."

BF: "You do? That's cool."

OP (window shopping w BF): "Wow thats a beautiful necklace. I think I would look great in that! Do you think its too exoensive?"

BF: "Yes I am sure it would look great on you. I am surenit would be worth every penny."

OP (thinking to herself) :"Hooray, BF promised to get me that expensive necklace for VD!!!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He is the person that imitated the gift conversation. He said we could exchange gifts if it was important to me. I said it was. He then asked for some gift ideas and gave me his. The sweater was something he listed so I bought it. When I gave it to him he said thanks, but gave me nothing.

Did you ask him to buy you naughty negligee wear or kinky sex toys?

If you asked for anything else he knows you are just not into him. So why bother?

But I bet you asked for jewelry. The more expensive, the better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I knew this thread would get flooded with the DCUM Cool Girls who don't care about hallmark holidays, but if this couple discussed it, agreed to exchange gifts, and he blew it off, how is that not a jerk move? Regardless of your personal feelings about Vday.

OP left out what she asked for. No doubt because it was over the top greedy.

What did you ask for OP?

[Anonymous]

Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems manipulative and cruel to agree to exchange gifts, accept someone’s gift, and not have anything in return. Dump him.

OP did not actually convey the actual conversation wih her bf which she claims is when he agreed to buy her anything.

Because it was probably something far more ambiguous.

OP: "I think it is important to give gifts to each other on VD."

BF: "You do? That's cool."

OP (window shopping w BF): "Wow thats a beautiful necklace. I think I would look great in that! Do you think its too exoensive?"

BF: "Yes I am sure it would look great on you. I am surenit would be worth every penny."

OP (thinking to herself) :"Hooray, BF promised to get me that expensive necklace for VD!!!"

Why is so hard to believe that the situation went exactly as OP described it, that HE brought it up, said they could exchange gifts if it was important to her, then asked her for ideas. He literally asked her for ideas of what to get her, and then not only ignored those ideas but the entire thing all together. Seems cruel to me. It's awkward, that first Valentine's Day with a new boyfriend or girlfriend. What a great way to keep that from happening! Be all transparent! So you go into the day feeling good because you avoided all the weirdness! And then not so much. How nasty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

Only an infantile child cries because they didnt get a piece of cake for their birthday. Not a 40 year old person who claims to be an adult.

Is your friend overweight or obese? Be honest. If not, why is chowing down on unhealthy junk food somethingto cry over.

JFC of all the things for a 40 year old to cry over. There was an earthquake in Syria , thoisands killed. Cry over that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems manipulative and cruel to agree to exchange gifts, accept someone’s gift, and not have anything in return. Dump him.

OP did not actually convey the actual conversation wih her bf which she claims is when he agreed to buy her anything.

Because it was probably something far more ambiguous.

OP: "I think it is important to give gifts to each other on VD."

BF: "You do? That's cool."

OP (window shopping w BF): "Wow thats a beautiful necklace. I think I would look great in that! Do you think its too exoensive?"

BF: "Yes I am sure it would look great on you. I am surenit would be worth every penny."

OP (thinking to herself) :"Hooray, BF promised to get me that expensive necklace for VD!!!"

Why is so hard to believe that the situation went exactly as OP described it, that HE brought it up, said they could exchange gifts if it was important to her, then asked her for ideas. He literally asked her for ideas of what to get her, and then not only ignored those ideas but the entire thing all together. Seems cruel to me. It's awkward, that first Valentine's Day with a new boyfriend or girlfriend. What a great way to keep that from happening! Be all transparent! So you go into the day feeling good because you avoided all the weirdness! And then not so much. How nasty.

BC her version makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

Only an infantile child cries because they didnt get a piece of cake for their birthday. Not a 40 year old person who claims to be an adult.

Is your friend overweight or obese? Be honest. If not, why is chowing down on unhealthy junk food somethingto cry over.

JFC of all the things for a 40 year old to cry over. There was an earthquake in Syria , thoisands killed. Cry over that.

+1. People have unrealistic expectations of their spouses and seem to confuse reality with a Hallmark movie. Life is busier and far more hectic than caring about a card. IF your spouse is understanding, treats you well, helps with the family, and provides comfort, you're good
The additional demands that many people make of their partners is just stupid. Women, stop trying to play the role of the princess. It's exhausting. We can do better than that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

Only an infantile child cries because they didnt get a piece of cake for their birthday. Not a 40 year old person who claims to be an adult.

Is your friend overweight or obese? Be honest. If not, why is chowing down on unhealthy junk food somethingto cry over.

JFC of all the things for a 40 year old to cry over. There was an earthquake in Syria , thoisands killed. Cry over that.

She's not crying over the cake. She's crying because her DH can't even do the most basic thing to make her feel special on her 40th birthday. It feels bad to tell someone "this is what I need from you to feel good about our relationship" and have them ignore it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

Only an infantile child cries because they didnt get a piece of cake for their birthday. Not a 40 year old person who claims to be an adult.

Is your friend overweight or obese? Be honest. If not, why is chowing down on unhealthy junk food somethingto cry over.

JFC of all the things for a 40 year old to cry over. There was an earthquake in Syria , thoisands killed. Cry over that.

+1. People have unrealistic expectations of their spouses and seem to confuse reality with a Hallmark movie. Life is busier and far more hectic than caring about a card. IF your spouse is understanding, treats you well, helps with the family, and provides comfort, you're good
The additional demands that many people make of their partners is just stupid. Women, stop trying to play the role of the princess. It's exhausting. We can do better than that.

Seriously? You think a cake on her 40th bday is an unreasonable demand? Why even be in a relationship with someone if you don't care about how they feel?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just dump him. It won’t get any better. My good friend cried on her fortieth because she explicitly asked her DH for a simple cake and he couldn’t even do that, because he “doesn’t celebrate like that”. Don’t set yourself up for misery.

Only an infantile child cries because they didnt get a piece of cake for their birthday. Not a 40 year old person who claims to be an adult.

Is your friend overweight or obese? Be honest. If not, why is chowing down on unhealthy junk food somethingto cry over.

JFC of all the things for a 40 year old to cry over. There was an earthquake in Syria , thoisands killed. Cry over that.

Do you think it's about the cake? Be honest.