Please suggest a kind and gentle school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was there a process or criteria you used to identify F&M and W&M? Those are interesting choices, given your question.

Franklin & Marshall is known to be a pressure cooker. Very intense academically. I would not send a kid with depression there. He needs to feel successful, and that is not the type of atmosphere that will be nurturing. Great school, but not for a kid with the issues you describe, OP. W&M I don't know anything about personally, but I've been told it's quite competitive. It's hard to get into, so attracts competitive, high achievers. Dickenson might be a good choice. Near F&M, but lower pressure. Seemed like a more relaxed place. My kid was very interested, but didn't get enough FA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was there a process or criteria you used to identify F&M and W&M? Those are interesting choices, given your question.

Franklin & Marshall is known to be a pressure cooker. Very intense academically. I would not send a kid with depression there. He needs to feel successful, and that is not the type of atmosphere that will be nurturing. Great school, but not for a kid with the issues you describe, OP. W&M I don't know anything about personally, but I've been told it's quite competitive. It's hard to get into, so attracts competitive, high achievers. Dickenson might be a good choice. Near F&M, but lower pressure. Seemed like a more relaxed place. My kid was very interested, but didn't get enough FA.

I've never heard such a thing about F&M. I'm surprised by your impressions and I know it pretty well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was there a process or criteria you used to identify F&M and W&M? Those are interesting choices, given your question.

Franklin & Marshall is known to be a pressure cooker. Very intense academically. I would not send a kid with depression there. He needs to feel successful, and that is not the type of atmosphere that will be nurturing. Great school, but not for a kid with the issues you describe, OP. W&M I don't know anything about personally, but I've been told it's quite competitive. It's hard to get into, so attracts competitive, high achievers. Dickenson might be a good choice. Near F&M, but lower pressure. Seemed like a more relaxed place. My kid was very interested, but didn't get enough FA.

I've never heard such a thing about F&M. I'm surprised by your impressions and I know it pretty well.

I’ve heard the same as the first poster, and that there is an intense pre-professional/pre-wall street crowd. It isn’t where I’d look with a kid who wants kind and gentle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was there a process or criteria you used to identify F&M and W&M? Those are interesting choices, given your question.

Franklin & Marshall is known to be a pressure cooker. Very intense academically. I would not send a kid with depression there. He needs to feel successful, and that is not the type of atmosphere that will be nurturing. Great school, but not for a kid with the issues you describe, OP. W&M I don't know anything about personally, but I've been told it's quite competitive. It's hard to get into, so attracts competitive, high achievers. Dickenson might be a good choice. Near F&M, but lower pressure. Seemed like a more relaxed place. My kid was very interested, but didn't get enough FA.

I've never heard such a thing about F&M. I'm surprised by your impressions and I know it pretty well.

+1

[Anonymous]

Macalester. They care a lot about the students, have many clubs and activities for such a small school, and their student body has a reputation for being very conscientious. The only downside for mental health is the cold but most of their buildings are connected by skyways and tunnels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:George Washington is supposed to have happy students. They have a smaller campus that's very nice and quiet, as well as downtown dorms, which I couldn't stand, but I'm a small town person, not that it matters! My DC almost went there for engineering. Kids were very nice. Also UMBC, which is smallish, lots of commuters, laid back atmosphere, but good school if you don't mind the ugly campus!!

Happy, maybe. But also very rich and super competitive - especially in poly sci and international relations.

[Anonymous]

It may be too cold/far but Carleton is a genuinely kind community. You will see that word used over and over again to describe it, and my child there affirms that it is true.

But it is, in fact, very very cold.

[Anonymous]

I know there are a lot of Oberlin hater on this board but my daughter found the kindest and most supportive friends there. She graduated last May and we had the pleasure of hosting several for her graduation party and couldn’t have enjoyed them more. The academics are definitely challenging but she developed great relationships with her professors, which made it worthwhile. I’d highly recommend looking at Oberlin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:University of Mary Washington? We visited twice, and my DD loved it, but went elsewhere because of money. It seemed like a very nice, down to earth college. Also Lafayette seemed that way too, but no FA for our family, so she didn't go there. Gettysburg? Ursinus? Juniata? Muhlenberg? Very small schools. Also McDaniel, SMCM. All seem like very nice places to go to school, not pressure cookers, supportive, friendly, somewhat isolated.

Lafayette and Gettysburg frat hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:University of Mary Washington? We visited twice, and my DD loved it, but went elsewhere because of money. It seemed like a very nice, down to earth college. Also Lafayette seemed that way too, but no FA for our family, so she didn't go there. Gettysburg? Ursinus? Juniata? Muhlenberg? Very small schools. Also McDaniel, SMCM. All seem like very nice places to go to school, not pressure cookers, supportive, friendly, somewhat isolated.

Lafayette and Gettysburg frat hard.

Lafayette’s Greek party scene is intense.
(I would skip Lehigh too.)

[Anonymous]

YMMV at all schools. Some may have a higher percentage of "kind and gentle" people than others, but that is a difficult thing to ascertain and they will all have some people your kid may have to deal with or navigate around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Manhattan College.

Professors are expected to refer any who are struggling within the first 5 weeks of a semester to the Student Success Office. Staff then go knocking on the student’s door. They don’t wait for students to come to them, they seek the students out. I find this policy very unusual and have been very impressed with this level of commitment to students.

We are planning a visit to Manhattan College so thanks for that info. Anything else you'd like to add? Positive or negative. Thanks!

Sure. Here goes.

1. Campus/Location - A cozy 22 acre, very walkable campus in the exclusive Fieldston/Riverdale Bronx neighborhood on the City border with Westchester County. Although the campus is small, there is plenty of open space across Broadway. When you walk out the front door of one of the twin, high rise dorms, the 1000+ acre Van Cortlandt Park is literally across the street, large enough to contain a public golf course and the premier cross country running path in NYC. There is a subway stop right there on Broadway for access into Manhattan.

2. Academics - In addition to A&S, the college has Schools of Engineering, Business, and Education & Health, thereby providing a wide range of majors including ones in which a student can actually get a job upon graduation. The College has a fine reputation in NYC, a large local alumni network, and good access to internships.

3. Access - Campus is easily reached by car, a short drive up the Henry Hudson Parkway from the George Washington Bridge. There is parking in a campus parking garage across the street from the main entrance on Manhattan College Parkway. Call in advance to make parking arrangements.

4. Dining Out - There are a number of restaurants to choose from in Riverdale, but for a real treat, drive 10 minutes up the road to “X20 on the Hudson” in Yonkers. Located on a pier in the river, it offers magnificent views of the Hudson and of the Palisades on the opposite shore. Food & service were excellent when we were there a few years ago and you can enjoy watching the boats go by.

5. To See & Do in the Area - A walk around Fieldston is a delight. A charming, private but ungated community with an eclectic mix of homes, even the streets are privately owned. In addition, 10 minutes south of campus, in Fort Tryon Park on a bluff overlooking the Hudson is The Cloisters, a collection of 4 authentic cloisters moved to NY from France a century ago and today housing an impressive collection of medieval art, displayed in a very unique medieval setting. There are dining options at The Cloisters.

Enjoy your visit.

[Anonymous]

Similar and we looked at stone hill and Wheaton in Massachusetts, Wooster, st Olaf, muhlenberg, goucher, Allegheny, and Niagara.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would tread carefully WRT William and Mary. Students have heavy workloads and the profs have very high expectations. The freshman (non-Lemon, or the else Monroe Scholars’) dorms are in deplorable condition for the most expensive state-supported school in the country.
Please be aware that mental health issues can become an issue. https://flathatnews.com/2021/05/03/84-forced-hospitalizations-in-six-years-students-detail-negative-experiences-with-mental-health-services/

Is this true re: W&M? We're waiting to hear application status and were aware of the heavy workloads, but also heard it was a supportive environment. Didn't know the freshman dorms were also horrible - is that true?

They don't have air conditioning and are very old.

Back a few years ago, it, like Cornell, had an abnormally high suicide rate amongst students due to stress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to describe what you are seeking by “kind and gentle” - do you mean kind students (all will have some but bone will have all), easy connections with profs, actual academic and emotional supports.

for starters-Dickinson, Albright, Elon

in state colleges in dcum area - JMU or SMCM

Agree. What is "kind and gentle". No school will have all kind and gentle people.