Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I honestly would suggest that you ask him to see a (good) therapist. I'd make him start there. That provides socialization and support. This advice-giving role can be outsourced, and the most effective strategies (particularly given his rigidity) will be self-generated (or at least will seem to be self-generated).
In the meantime, I'd suggest that you focus on self-care for yourself. That will hopefully create a more positive feedback loop in your family. That's the one thing that will make a difference that is within your control.
These are both good suggestions. I've come up with them myself in the past few days, as nothing, and I mean not one thing gets through to DS. It's astonishing and heartbreaking to me that a kid can reach so high and fall so far in such a short time. I am going to try to see if somehow DS will listen to the idea of going to a therapist, but I don't know how to get him to even accept the idea that he might need one. He is so, so smart in the STEM area, and so, so stupid in other areas!! It drives me insane. And yes, I'm focusing on myself and my needs too as a way to distract myself from worrying about DS. But the worry always returns.
I posted hoping to hear success stories from other parents of adult HFASD children, but this has in fact been a disappointing thread, as there aren't many success stories. Kicking a child into the street isn't my idea of success. I'll never kick my kid out. I don't think giving your own flesh and blood a roof over his or her head and food to eat is coddling or spoiling them. It's taking care of basic needs, and I can't deny my child those.
Thanks for the suggestions, all. I'm despairing right now about DS and his future.
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