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Do these Cranky Pants make me look fat?
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Anonymous
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I have been in a rotten mood all day, and I note that the tenor of my responses to pretty much everything today has been...well...a bit hostile. I have a bevy of excuses I can provide upon request.
Anyone else? Tell me what's making you irritable, and I'll be sure to respond to you in an annoyed tone. (Just kidding...I am trying to calm down now and knock off the pissy attitude.) I will do my best to offer a lovely platitude of some sort. Really. |
Anonymous
| Ive got tight muscles and a pinched nerve, annoying me all day. |
Anonymous
That pinched nerve is reminding you that you are a strong, amazing woman, alive and capable of handling anything! Your tight muscles are becoming leaner, stronger, more metabolically efficient! Tomorrow you will wake up even more fantastic than you are today (and hopefully pain free). |
Anonymous
| I'm not getting my family the H1N1 vaccine.....(just testing). |
Anonymous
You will be lauded by those who fear vaccine scarcity! And possibly by whomever is named as the beneficiary on your life insurance policy. (Hey, I'm doing my best here.) |
Anonymous
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PMS.
My children are off the wall today. All my fillings need to be replaces, I need a crown, and I have finally cracked a couple of teeth as a result of grinding them. I have guards, but I wake up to find them stuck to my husband's back. Don't tell him. There aren't enough days in the week to get all the things done that I need to. That I didn't make enough dinner to feed me everyone so I had frozen burritos. |
Anonymous
Ah, PMS is the gentle caress of the fertility gods, who have smiled upon you and given you the children who are currently driving you batty. You are a wonderful mother because you haven't made your children INTO burritos by grinding them between your well sharpened teeth. Your husband is fortunate to have a wife willing to sleep in the same bed with him, because really, shouldn't he be the one dealing with the kid madness by this time of the evening? Your life is so full that not even nine days per week could contain all of the excitement and wonder that surrounds you, though your amazing stamina would give you the strength to endure 36 hour days, if only they were an option. |
Anonymous
I think this is one of the greatest threads ever on DCUM's! OP would make a great Pollyanna for 2009! 
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Anonymous
OP here. You are all serving as my Prozac this evening. Positive writing requires an agressive level of positive thinking. KILL THE BAD MOOD. KILL IT. Er, I mean, bring forth the bright thoughts of sunshine, opportunity, gratefulness, blessings! |
Anonymous
Ha ha! Favorite response so far. Great job, OP. |
Anonymous
Thank you.
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Anonymous
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OK, I'll test the waters...
My four year old is driving me batty. She has an opinion on EVERYTHING. Grocery store trips are a nightmare that always end with the cashier looking at you like you're the deranged one because you are sniping at that point rather than bowing down before this gorgeous bundle of blonde blue-eyedness that he has seen in action for all of 30 seconds. My stupid cat allergy shot I got today swelled my arm up to twice its normal size and I am itching all over. I am convinced several people at work are after my job, and I simultaneously want them to have it and don't want to be bankrupt. My seven year old is trying her best to live out the title of the Ames & Ilg book - Your Seven Year Old: Life in a Minor Key. Hope you were up for a challenge, OP! |
Anonymous
What an amazing mother you are for raising a bright, inquisitive child, who is filled with the confidence and knowledge that she is loved, thus freeing her to speak her mind! You are a model of patience and constraint for not reaching over that check-out counter and throttling that no-nothing (er, I mean, parentally inexperienced) kid behind the cash register! Your body is strategically designed to warn you of danger, and the swelling in your arm confirms that your body is working wonderfully, if a bit too wonderfully at the moment. You have the intelligence to recognize both the good and the bad in a situation, the upsides and the downsides to a decision. Your job is desirable enough that others want it, so you must be doing something right, and they haven't managed to take it from you despite best efforts, so you are clearly a goddess. Your ability to not flee your home and hide in a dark theater, eating loads and loads of delicious buttery popcorn and slurping cherry coke, despite the "tone" of your seven year old, again evidences your grace under pressure - the pressure of being mom to a kid that age. To summarize: bright inquisitive child; body works great; smart and kick-ass job; graceful. |
Anonymous
| OP you are great. |
Anonymous
| My DH is getting on my nerves. And I hate his mother. |