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I could be in a movie right now.
My brother is getting married today (Sunday evening wedding). Two weeks ago, likely due to nerves, he blasted me and basically told me he thinks I suck. Yet expects me to still come to the wedding. DH is a groomsmen but I am not a bridesmaid (which is fine bc I don’t want to be one, but it means DH is wrapped up in wedding activities while I manage our 3 young kids). Speaking of kids, they were invited. But now that we are here we were told not to come to the ceremony bc the bride is going to have a panic attack if my two year old cries. So we are just going to the reception. Since it’s a Sunday wedding and we had a rehearsal dinner Sat night, we slept in the hotel Sat eve and will leave Sun after the reception. Since we checked out of the hotel we have to stay in my parents’ room until the reception. The room was $300/night which is why we only stayed one night. Also, my 7 year old insulted the brides mother to her face by repeating a mean comment I said privately. This one is my fault, but it was mortifying. Can’t wait til this horrible weekend is over! |
| What did he say to you—recent stuff regarding his bride or how you always ate the Fruit Loops and never left him any. |
He said something along the lines that I’m a horrible person and he hopes I lose my job. He is actually somewhat mentally ill so it is not unusual. |
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Get a sitter for your kids during the ceremony and show up. Be polite and good natured and draw no attention to yourself or your family during your brother and his wife's day.
Then go low contact until you and your brother can resolve things. |
| When you allow yourself to be treated like a doormat, you feel like a doormat. |
| Send your husband and stay home. Sounds like a nightmare scenario with little kids and a high strung bride and groom. |
| Why can’t ypir husband have backed out of the wedding party after your brother treated you so badly? He should stand by you. Your brother shouldn’t get the benefit of DH suppoirt while you are left - literally- back at the hotel with your kids. You can all go to the reception. |
| I would not be sitting in a hotel with kids. Leave right after the ceremony if your dh feels he needs to be there. |
| Was part of the reason your brother got so mad anything to do with the fact that you apparently talk so much shit about his MIL that your seven year old picks it up and repeats it? |
| You lost me at the part where you are stupid enough to talk shit about your SIL's mom in front of your kids. I question your judgment, and it sounds like your brother does too. |
| You hardly sound innocent in all of this. |
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I would have happily gotten a babysitter if they had mentioned it was an adult only wedding.
My brother is likely going to be an emotionally abusive spouse so he’s their problem now. |
I just met the MIL here. I was talking to DH and said something about her looks and didn’t realize DS was listening. It wasn’t “so much shit”... it was one sentence and he repeated it and I will be forever mortified. My beef is not with her. |
| My problem is with people saying “bring the kids we want them to come”, coming and then having them change their minds. I’m out of town... they gave me one day notice. |
| Are there any other children there? I can't imagine traveling to my brother's wedding and then not being welcome to attend the ceremony once there. Is the person who told you to no longer attend, owning that call? I can see this being turned around, and having people told you decided not to attend. |