WWYD - no invite

[Anonymous]

Our neighbors have hosted a NYE party for years now and we have always been invited.

This year, no invite. Don't know why.

My husband thinks it's an oversight and that we should just go over. Because we have always been invited and we don't need a formal invite to come.

I think it's rude to just show up, oversight or not. He is sulking now because he thinks we will miss out on a good time and that I'm too concerned about "the way it looks".

Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Maybe they aren’t having the party?

Yes, it would be rude to just show up.

[Anonymous]

Did you go in the past when you were invited?

[Anonymous]

Are you sure they’re having it this year?

[Anonymous]

"We didn't receive an invite and are concerned that it was an oversight or was lost in the mail. If so, we'd love to join. If you're having a small gathering this year, no worries, maybe we can get dinner in a couple months."

If they say it's a small gathering, and it's a rager, you know where you stand.

[Anonymous]

It would be weird if you showed up without knowing you’re invited or if they’re having a party. Ideally you would’ve asked them before today, “you guys still having a party this tear?”

[Anonymous]

OP here. Yes we have gone in the past unless out of town.
We know they’re hosting because a few friends said “See you there!” without realizing we didn’t get invited.

[Anonymous]

Unspeakably ride to show up anywhere without and express invitation, IMHO.

If it WAS an oversight and they realize it once the party is going, I assume they’re likely to pop over to get you if they notice you’re home.

As an aside, do you think there’s a reason you might not have been included? Like you don’t reciprocate or similar?

[Anonymous]

“Hi bob and Susan, any plans for NYE this year?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Yes we have gone in the past unless out of town.
We know they’re hosting because a few friends said “See you there!” without realizing we didn’t get invited.

Can you ask one of the friends to ask the host?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Yes we have gone in the past unless out of town.
We know they’re hosting because a few friends said “See you there!” without realizing we didn’t get invited.

Can you ask one of the friends to ask the host?

This is the only way. Anything else is rude and presumptuous.

[Anonymous]

Do you see them regularly otherwise? I’d assume that if I was invited and I happened to see them around the neighborhood, they would ask if I was planning on coming to their party. If they didn’t ask, I’d figure I wasnt invited.

But yea, it would be extremely rude to just show up, and won’t be much of a good time if they didn’t plan on your attendance so they don’t have food or drinks for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"We didn't receive an invite and are concerned that it was an oversight or was lost in the mail. If so, we'd love to join. If you're having a small gathering this year, no worries, maybe we can get dinner in a couple months."

If they say it's a small gathering, and it's a rager, you know where you stand.

OMG no you don't ask why you weren't invited. That is so rude and puts them in such an awkward spot. You are right, hubs is wrong. Find something else to do.

[Anonymous]

I would go. I would assume it was an oversight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Yes we have gone in the past unless out of town.
We know they’re hosting because a few friends said “See you there!” without realizing we didn’t get invited.

Can you ask one of the friends to ask the host?

This is the only way. Anything else is rude and presumptuous.

This is a good approach. Have one of your friends asks if/when you will be arriving. Then they can relay the response to you.