My 7 year Old Suspended for four Days MCPS

[Anonymous]

My son has been suspended for 4 days for kicking a paraeducator. I feel awful about it. I'm trying to see what my next steps should be. The incident started on the playground where according to him he was throwing mulch and rocks on the ground. Another student went to the paraeducator and said that he was throwing rocks at them. The paraeducator then came to my son and according to him yelled "NO THROWING ROCKS" and said he had to go to the office after recces.

My son did not do that, he proceeded to go to the special he had after recess because he didn't think he had done anything wrong. The paraeducator sees him standing in line at his special and tells him again to go to the office, in front of the other children and the substitute teacher, as the normal special teacher was out that day. He then asks the substitute if he can stay in class because he didn't do anything wrong. The substitute proceeds to mock him and repeats in a high pitched voice "I didn't do anything wrong." My son then runs away. He runs through the hallways at school and knocks over a recycling bin. He then runs down the stairs towards the office and is confronted by the assistant principal. As he is talking to her the paraeducator who has been following him walks up as well. He then kicks her in the knee.

A little background on my son. He has been having behavioral issues this year in class where this same paraeducator is his TA. He did not have any issues in K or 1st grade. He has stated to me prior to this incident that she picks on him. He's had a difficult year so far with acting out in class, being easily frustrated, and leaving when upset, and last week I met with the school regarding a FBA. They are in the process of observing him to create a Behavior Intervention Plan. The school is also aware that he is getting tested on Thursday for potential ADHD, etc. We talked about triggers etc. but I'm unsure they were shared with the paraeducator in question.

He obviously should never have kicked anyone and will be punished in that regard.

What should I do in this situation? Any input is appreciated.

[Anonymous]

I have never heard of an elementary student being suspended for 4 days except for stabbing.

Is your MCPS school a PBIS school? If so, does he have a behavioral plan filled out by teachers?
Has he been suspended this year for other offences?
Did you talk to the school counselor? If not, call the school and ask for a meeting.

[Anonymous]

We're not in MCPS so I don't know the school calendar. How many days of school are left before winter break? Was he basically told not to come back until January? A 4 day suspension is a long time.

Is he in 1st or 2nd?

[Anonymous]

^^^ Sorry, I see that he is in 2nd now.

[Anonymous]

OP here: I'm not sure if his school is PBIS. He has not been suspended this year at all. I spoke with the school counselor at the FBA meeting last week but not after this instance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're not in MCPS so I don't know the school calendar. How many days of school are left before winter break? Was he basically told not to come back until January? A 4 day suspension is a long time.

Is he in 1st or 2nd?

He was told not to come back until after winter break, January 2. There are 4 days left this week before the break.

[Anonymous]

Your seven year old kicked a teacher. That's all the information you need. I honestly wish they would remove any (neurotypical) kid who gets physical with a teacher from the school permanently. Special placement in a class for behavior disorders. Or find a private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: I'm not sure if his school is PBIS. He has not been suspended this year at all. I spoke with the school counselor at the FBA meeting last week but not after this instance.

Definitely call the school and ask to meet with the counselor and the classroom teacher.

[Anonymous]

No personal experience, but the adults in that situation handled things terribly. He needs a different para at the very least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your seven year old kicked a teacher. That's all the information you need. I honestly wish they would remove any (neurotypical) kid who gets physical with a teacher from the school permanently. Special placement in a class for behavior disorders. Or find a private.

OP here: As I stated he is getting evaluated for a variety of executive functioning issues that the school is well aware of, including triggers. He has been in OT for sensory issues so I'm unsure he's the "neurotypical" child you're referring to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your seven year old kicked a teacher. That's all the information you need. I honestly wish they would remove any (neurotypical) kid who gets physical with a teacher from the school permanently. Special placement in a class for behavior disorders. Or find a private.

Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your seven year old kicked a teacher. That's all the information you need. I honestly wish they would remove any (neurotypical) kid who gets physical with a teacher from the school permanently. Special placement in a class for behavior disorders. Or find a private.

OP here: As I stated he is getting evaluated for a variety of executive functioning issues that the school is well aware of, including triggers. He has been in OT for sensory issues so I'm unsure he's the "neurotypical" child you're referring to.

OP ignore that PP. Behaviors are the "third rail" around here, even on the SN forum.

I would address this very proactively with the school, and express that you think a 4 day suspension when there are likely special needs is not acceptable, and that you expect them to do the FBA and come up with behavioral interventions for this para ASAP. I would also get a private child psychologist on board and INSIST that they be allowed to come to the school to do an observation and provide recommendations for behavioral interventions for this para, and this should happen in January, NOT wait for the IEP. If they're going to take such dramatic action as suspending him, they need to allow your child psychologist to have access to the school in order to start working towards solutions. If they offer that MCPS staff can do the same thing in January, that would be OK too. What's NOT ok is letting this situation slide without immediate attention in January. No waiting for the assessments and IEP meeting, which could take several months.

[Anonymous]

Does your child have an IEP yet? Sounds like he does not.

Your child was behaving insanely, doing something that every 2nd grader knows is not allowed. "I wasn't doing anything wrong" in his opinion is not a defense. You can't seriously think he thinks what he was doing is okay.

Then he openly defied an adult's instructions rather than going to the office. I doubt he stopped throwing things immediately, either. Teachers don't send kids to the office if they stop doing what they are doing when told.

When he was told by that adult again to go to the office, he backtalked her. Offense 3 or 4 at this point.

Then he defied her again and ran away. Do you know how many adults probably had to be alerted about an absconding child at that point? Probabaly a lot, because a kid as defiant as yours could be a runner and run out of the building. It's a big deal. Offense 4 or 5, a major one.

And THEN he purposefully assaults the adult in front of another adult?

Suspension is warranted. Multi-day. You could quibble about whether it is 3 or 4 days but to what end? Do you think what your child did is in any way acceptable? (Even if it were true that the adult mimicked his backtalking, which seems beyond unlikely, that doesn't make his behavior in any way acceptable.)

Even if he gets an ADHD diagnosis, you can't let him think that a series of unsafe behaviors, backtalk, defiance, absconding, and assaulting an adult is okay or defensible. Stay home with him those 4 days, no screens, and work with him. Do educational things, puzzles, read aloud a, schoolwork, and apology letters. And realize that how you react now may determine whether this happens again. This is not the time to turn on the school. This is the time to hold your child close and arrest some very bad behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your child have an IEP yet? Sounds like he does not.

Your child was behaving insanely, doing something that every 2nd grader knows is not allowed. "I wasn't doing anything wrong" in his opinion is not a defense. You can't seriously think he thinks what he was doing is okay.

Then he openly defied an adult's instructions rather than going to the office. I doubt he stopped throwing things immediately, either. Teachers don't send kids to the office if they stop doing what they are doing when told.

When he was told by that adult again to go to the office, he backtalked her. Offense 3 or 4 at this point.

Then he defied her again and ran away. Do you know how many adults probably had to be alerted about an absconding child at that point? Probabaly a lot, because a kid as defiant as yours could be a runner and run out of the building. It's a big deal. Offense 4 or 5, a major one.

And THEN he purposefully assaults the adult in front of another adult?

Suspension is warranted. Multi-day. You could quibble about whether it is 3 or 4 days but to what end? Do you think what your child did is in any way acceptable? (Even if it were true that the adult mimicked his backtalking, which seems beyond unlikely, that doesn't make his behavior in any way acceptable.)

Even if he gets an ADHD diagnosis, you can't let him think that a series of unsafe behaviors, backtalk, defiance, absconding, and assaulting an adult is okay or defensible. Stay home with him those 4 days, no screens, and work with him. Do educational things, puzzles, read aloud a, schoolwork, and apology letters. And realize that how you react now may determine whether this happens again. This is not the time to turn on the school. This is the time to hold your child close and arrest some very bad behavior.

OP knows the behavior is out of hand. If it was as simple as telling OP she needs to 'arrest bad behavior," she wouldn't be here. She knows this is serious. Do you have anything helpful to say, beyond your lectures?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your seven year old kicked a teacher. That's all the information you need. I honestly wish they would remove any (neurotypical) kid who gets physical with a teacher from the school permanently. Special placement in a class for behavior disorders. Or find a private.

OP here: As I stated he is getting evaluated for a variety of executive functioning issues that the school is well aware of, including triggers. He has been in OT for sensory issues so I'm unsure he's the "neurotypical" child you're referring to.

I totally disagree with the above rude PP.

But OP, your child is does not have an IEP or a documented disability in the eyes of the school, or even medically. So the protections that would be afforded to a child who has disabilities don't apply to your child.

You may want to spend the break trying to get an evaluation and determine if your child does have a disability, and present this information to the school.