My 7 year Old Suspended for four Days MCPS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Unfortunately, MCPS has recently decided that long suspensions of young children are generally prohibited. So I guess schools will have to find a different way to communicate to parents that their child's behavior is unacceptable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

As PP said, there might be some parents like that, but the vast majority of parents who request an IEP are not going to be ones who think it's all the school's problem because the process itself puts so much burden on parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Well said.

OP here: This is not true in out case. I repeatedly asked for interventions from the school. It "slipped from the radar" of the counselor., and later the psychologist. He is just getting a FBA and at the last meeting there "wasn't enough data" for a BIP. I've been pulling him during school hours to take him to OT and therapy for a problem that has only arisen since September in this classroom. I've been told by both his teacher, counselor and principal that I've been remarkably proactive. I cannot say the same for the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Unfortunately, MCPS has recently decided that long suspensions of young children are generally prohibited. So I guess schools will have to find a different way to communicate to parents that their child's behavior is unacceptable.

State of Maryland decided that. Call your legislator if you don't like it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Well said.

OP here: This is not true in out case. I repeatedly asked for interventions from the school. It "slipped from the radar" of the counselor., and later the psychologist. He is just getting a FBA and at the last meeting there "wasn't enough data" for a BIP. I've been pulling him during school hours to take him to OT and therapy for a problem that has only arisen since September in this classroom. I've been told by both his teacher, counselor and principal that I've been remarkably proactive. I cannot say the same for the school.

Sounds like the school needed the wake up call, not you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here: This is not true in out case. I repeatedly asked for interventions from the school. It "slipped from the radar" of the counselor., and later the psychologist. He is just getting a FBA and at the last meeting there "wasn't enough data" for a BIP. I've been pulling him during school hours to take him to OT and therapy for a problem that has only arisen since September in this classroom. I've been told by both his teacher, counselor and principal that I've been remarkably proactive. I cannot say the same for the school.

Oh god, I'm having serious flashbacks. We got the same run around about the counselor being "really busy" with other issues and forgetting about DC, and about not enough data for the FBA/BIP while DH and I were killing ourselves myself shuttled DC from this type of therapy to that type of therapy almost every day. In all the cases I know it is the schools that are incompetent or lazy and not the parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had diagnosed ADHD when I was growing up and if I ever did what OP's kid did, my parents would support the school 100% and wouldn't try to use my disability as a reason to justify my behavior. Disability doesn't mean free reign to behave however I please, even when I was 7.

I write this knowing I'll be flamed, but I've seen too many of these posts recently with parents justifying their child's behavior due to ADHD. You're not doing your child any favors by doing this.

It's not that anyone on this thread is justifying the behavior, it's just an empirical fact that, at this age, ADHD or not, suspensions do not have the desired effect. Not that there should be no consequences, but the consequences should be meaningful to the child so that he or she learns from it.

Sometimes suspensions are what it takes to get the parents to realize that it's actually a problem. In a lot of cases, if it doesn't impact the parent so that they see it's a legitimate concern then there's little hope for the behavior actually changing.

So you think its acceptable to give an overly harsh and counterproductive punishment to a child as a way of exacting revenge on parents?

No, I don't think it's a way of exacting revenge on parents. I think it's a way to get parents to wake up and see that they have to realize that the behavior their child is exhibiting is unacceptable whether they have ADHD or not. A lot of parents believe that all learning should occur at school, including learning what's appropriate behavior or not. Parents are ultimately their child's most important teacher. If they excuse their child, ignore the behavior or expect for the school to handle every bit of parenting/consequences then sometimes it takes inconveniencing them for them to realize that it's actually more of an issue than they thought it was.

Yes, some parents are very well aware and take steps accordingly. But there are a lot who figure it's the school's problem during the hours of 8:30-3:30, which is not helpful to the child at all.

Well said.

OP here: This is not true in out case. I repeatedly asked for interventions from the school. It "slipped from the radar" of the counselor., and later the psychologist. He is just getting a FBA and at the last meeting there "wasn't enough data" for a BIP. I've been pulling him during school hours to take him to OT and therapy for a problem that has only arisen since September in this classroom. I've been told by both his teacher, counselor and principal that I've been remarkably proactive. I cannot say the same for the school.

Have the OT and therapist write letters about the concerns since september and give it to the school. Make sure you send it by email with confirmation.