Would You Date A Woman Who Used To Be Fat?

[Anonymous]

I am a late 20's woman that has lost 75lbs in the last year, and have kept it off for the past 6 months. I was always a skinny child and teen but developed PCOS when puberty set in, and started gaining weight in my early 20's. I struggled with the issue for years and finally got it under control after a drastic change in diet and going on medication. The extra weight left me with stretchmarks on my breast, stomach, thighs, and hips. I have noticed since losing the weight, two guys I have dated looked at me differently once they found out. One never called me back after a month, and the other was very rude about it. I don't want it to define me, but I am worried that it may hinder my chances of finding a good guy.

[Anonymous]

Nope! Certainly not.

[Anonymous]

I would not date you.

High risk for getting fat again.

[Roar]

OP: why settle for a good guy. You deserve a great one. No time or energy wasted on them. Instead, your weight loss shows you can commit to turning a bad situation better with you willing to invest in yourself. However, if you've got another flaw or are a dead fish in bed, it's an easy excuse for the real reason.

[Anonymous]

The chances of you becoming obese after childbearing is really really high. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Plenty of people date actually obese people because people are way more than their looks. Find someone who is so crazy about you, they need you in their life no matter what. F-- those who don't.

[Anonymous]

So you had an health issue that caused you to gain weight and it took you years to get it under control and find the right meds, but now it is and you are back to a normal weight and guys don't want to date you when they find out? Is that who you want for a life mate, someone who would cut and run when they found out about your health issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you had an health issue that caused you to gain weight and it took you years to get it under control and find the right meds, but now it is and you are back to a normal weight and guys don't want to date you when they find out? Is that who you want for a life mate, someone who would cut and run when they found out about your health issue?

Op here. Yes. I am back to my normal without of 110lbs. I have always worked out and took care of my health, but PCOS was something I couldn't control. Not to make excuses, but it's not like I just sat around eating junk food. PCOS is similar to a thyroid problem, and can cause people to gain and uncontrollable amount of weight. It's not easy to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Roar wrote:OP: why settle for a good guy. You deserve a great one. No time or energy wasted on them. Instead, your weight loss shows you can commit to turning a bad situation better with you willing to invest in yourself. However, if you've got another flaw or are a dead fish in bed, it's an easy excuse for the real reason.

Op here. Everyone has flaws, and I am not exempt from them. I am not a dead fish, in fact I have always had a sex drive that rivaled most men. I am not a dead fish or vanilla.

[Anonymous]

There are guys that have to watch their diet, too. For compatibility reasons I would probably want to stick with guys who could relate to your struggles and could be a source of support for you. It's easier to make healthy food choices when the people around you are making them, too.

That said, it's just one aspect of your life. If you are open minded about who you date, you will have a lot more fun.

[Anonymous]

Go you OP! I'm proud of you. The guys sound like losers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go you OP! I'm proud of you. The guys sound like losers.

Guy here. I agree with this poster. What a great success story!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go you OP! I'm proud of you. The guys sound like losers.

+1000.

Good for you for fighting through all this. Those guys are good-for-nothing if they judge you for something like that. I can't even fathom seeing that as a reason to end a potential relationship.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Thank you! I know I have many things to offer. The rejection sometimes plays with your mind. My biggest worry is the strecthmarks. They're ugly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a late 20's woman that has lost 75lbs in the last year, and have kept it off for the past 6 months. I was always a skinny child and teen but developed PCOS when puberty set in, and started gaining weight in my early 20's. I struggled with the issue for years and finally got it under control after a drastic change in diet and going on medication. The extra weight left me with stretchmarks on my breast, stomach, thighs, and hips. I have noticed since losing the weight, two guys I have dated looked at me differently once they found out. One never called me back after a month, and the other was very rude about it. I don't want it to define me, but I am worried that it may hinder my chances of finding a good guy.

So, wait. They dated you when you were heavy, but don't want to date you now that you are thin?