Woke up in the middle of the night
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Anonymous
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To find my boyfriend of 1.5 years sitting on the floor next to my bed, going through my phone while I slept.
Nearly our whole relationship he's accused me of cheating. He didn't find anything but a few missed phone called via Facebook messenger from a guy he suspects I like, who was actually seeing my best friend for a while. Nothing else. I'm upset because this is t the first time he's gone through my phone without asking and the constant accusing just seems like it won't stop. What would you do? Btw, never cheated on him once and I was very in love with him. |
Anonymous
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You WERE very in love with him?
Cut bait. It won't get better. |
Anonymous
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A "few missed phone calls"? How often is this other guy calling you?
Mind you, I am not accusing you of cheating, and I do think it was wrong of him to go through your phone like that. But it does seem to me that this other guy likes you. |
Anonymous
The missed calls were 4 calls. The first two was right after I added him in Facebook because he went on a float trip with my friend he was seeing. He lost his phone and contacted me on Facebook the next day to see if he left it in a raft or bag that we all had. The other few phone calls are aaauming on accident. I didn't ask why he called and he didn't tell me. I say I loved my boyfriend in past tense because I'm trying to say I love him and wouldn't cheat on him |
Anonymous
See bolded. You need to break up with him. This is not a healthy relationship. He has trust issues. |
Anonymous
Not sure OP can prevent other people from liking her. It's if she acts upon it (which she's not) that would be the issue. |
Anonymous
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How old are you both and how long have you been together?
My DH when we first started dating literally would turn up at lunches I was having with female friends as a "surprise" when I think he was checking I wasn't meeting a guy. But it stopped because it was obvious I wasn't cheating and had no intention of doing so. I'm basically the most non-flirtatious non-cheaty person, ever in the universe. He is not paranoid now and never checks my phone or email. We've been happily married for nearly 15 years and have two kids. |
Anonymous
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He's a little insecure. Did he have someone cheat on him in his past? If you love him, make a little extra effort to let him know he's the only romantic interest in your life.
Other options are to let him know his insecurity bothers you and it's a turn off. It makes him less attractive to you. There is also the nuclear option of breaking up. Personally, I'd try A, then B. |
Anonymous
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There are so many red flags waving I don't know where to start.
End it. Then take a huge deep breath that you dodged an abusive crazy bullet. |
Anonymous
| If he happened to notice the call, say your phone rang while you were in the restroom and he saw "Bill" called, it might cause some suspicion. It would be strange this other guy is calling. 2 butt dials to you seems odd. Knowing men, it's not out of the realm of possibilities that he is not that into your friend and testing your waters. |
Anonymous
Your DH was acting like a crazy person. Just because you were ok with this, does not mean it is ok to do in general. You either have the ability to trust someone or you don't. If you are checking up on random lunches, you are in the "can NOT trust" category and need to seek therapy, not a relationship. |
Anonymous
| Who doesn't have a passcode on their phone? |
Anonymous
This x1000 |
Anonymous
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I would consider ending the relationship, OP. A person who constantly accuses you of cheating has serious mental problems, and they WILL NOT get better. Don't have kids with this person, whatever you do, otherwise they will be in your life forever. |
Anonymous
| Living with an insecure person is brutal and he likely won't change. Move on. |