New VA trans policies for schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

How do you determine which kids are genuinely transitioning vs those experimenting.

I can see some immature middle school boys having a good time with this.

Yeah that’s why it’s incredibly complex. That’s another issue in and of itself. What criteria is used to determine if a child is trans and how do we prevent the situation of a middle school boy pretending he identifies as a girl so he can go in the girl’s bathroom? But with the example PP gave, it is clear that the person has actually transitioned and isn’t an immature boy. The problem with Youngkin’s guidelines when it comes to bathrooms is that they are black and white.

There are ZERO problems with having guidelines that are black and white. That's the actual point of the policy. "This is the policy - do exactly this"
The policies are perfect. Girls will hopefully be less likely to be sexually assaulted in the GIRLS bathroom by "trans" boys. - Looking at YOU Loudoun county. Now he has a perfectly viable accommodation for everyone. Girls can go into the GIRLS bathroom.

Way to misrepresent what happened in LCPS.

RWNJ propaganda.

Yeah, no. There is a reason that LCPS lied about the rape during a SB meeting discussing trans kids using the bathrooms that aligned to their gender versus sex.
But hey it takes a few broken girls, I mean eggs, to make an omelet, right?

The rape had nothing to do with transgender-supportive bathroom policies. The rape was nonconsensual, but they met there consensually and before the policy was in place.

Rolling your eyes at a girl getting raped. Glad to see you don't even hide your contempt any more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

How do you determine which kids are genuinely transitioning vs those experimenting.

I can see some immature middle school boys having a good time with this.

Yeah that’s why it’s incredibly complex. That’s another issue in and of itself. What criteria is used to determine if a child is trans and how do we prevent the situation of a middle school boy pretending he identifies as a girl so he can go in the girl’s bathroom? But with the example PP gave, it is clear that the person has actually transitioned and isn’t an immature boy. The problem with Youngkin’s guidelines when it comes to bathrooms is that they are black and white.

There are ZERO problems with having guidelines that are black and white. That's the actual point of the policy. "This is the policy - do exactly this"
The policies are perfect. Girls will hopefully be less likely to be sexually assaulted in the GIRLS bathroom by "trans" boys. - Looking at YOU Loudoun county. Now he has a perfectly viable accommodation for everyone. Girls can go into the GIRLS bathroom.

Way to misrepresent what happened in LCPS.

RWNJ propaganda.

Yeah, no. There is a reason that LCPS lied about the rape during a SB meeting discussing trans kids using the bathrooms that aligned to their gender versus sex.
But hey it takes a few broken girls, I mean eggs, to make an omelet, right?

The rape had nothing to do with transgender-supportive bathroom policies. The rape was nonconsensual, but they met there consensually and before the policy was in place.

Rolling your eyes at a girl getting raped. Glad to see you don't even hide your contempt any more.

I was rolling my eyes at the PP's attempt to exploit the rape by misrepresenting what happened.

You're right. That certainly is worse than an eye roll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Now parents definitely know that teachers are not to be trusted. Thanks for outing yourself to us.

I'm not a teacher, dipshut.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Now parents definitely know that teachers are not to be trusted. Thanks for outing yourself to us.

Well we have no idea if PP is a teacher. I’m pretty sure that the majority of teachers are sane but then you have some whose brains have been completely taken over and view parents as the enemy.

They probably DGAF about parents in general. They care about the kids. If the kids don't want to tell their own parents, then there probably is a good reason. I support teachers encouraging their students to tell their parents (if they must get involved at all), but it's flat out wrong to "out" the kid against their will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

No, that is up to the child to decide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

The child can only socially transition if the school actively participates in the transition by treating the child as a member of the opposite gender. Social transition is a clinical pathway and should require the express consent of that child’s parents.

No, it should not be required. It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents.

Social transition is not a benign act and may put a child on a path of medicalization. It is not neutral and should only be undertaken after careful clinical evaluation. You may disagree but there is a body of evidence that shows otherwise. You and other parents may choose to disregard this evidence. That’s up to you. Other parents may choose not to. Each parent can look at the data and decide for themselves. Given the fact that there is major disagreement on whether social transition is a good thing for every child, parents should know if a child is being socially transitioned in school. Here is a good post with excellent links: https://jessesingal.substack.com/p/on-teachers-letting-kids-transition

Outing a child without their permission to their parents is also not benign and would likely be more devastating than going by different pronouns/name at school.

No, it should not be required for schools to "out" students to their parents without their permission.

I would rather have a devastated child that is getting the help they need within my family, than a dead kid that committed suicide because I wasn't aware of their gender dysphoria that had blossomed, grown and hidden at school.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

No, that is up to the child to decide.

If the student is using different pronouns and names at school - and the teachers, counselors, and other students are using them, the parents must be informed. I would expect other students not to say anything, but the counselor absolutely should inform the parents. Otherwise it is one big deception perpetrated against the parents who have legal responsibility for the child.

If I had to do it again today, my kids would absolutely not attend public school because of the attitudes about parents demonstrated on this board.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Now parents definitely know that teachers are not to be trusted. Thanks for outing yourself to us.

I’m a parent. Not a teacher.

I’m concerned for your well being, the reactivity is dangerous b

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

No, that is up to the child to decide.

If the student is using different pronouns and names at school - and the teachers, counselors, and other students are using them, the parents must be informed. I would expect other students not to say anything, but the counselor absolutely should inform the parents. Otherwise it is one big deception perpetrated against the parents who have legal responsibility for the child.

If I had to do it again today, my kids would absolutely not attend public school because of the attitudes about parents demonstrated on this board.

I'm a parent, not a teacher.

It is appalling that you want teachers to insert themselves into this situation and "out" these kids to their parents against their will. Such a violation of privacy and potentially traumatizing.

Would you insist on outing gay kids in the same way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just nuts. So much for small government republicans huh.

This is indeed the biggest irony of it all.

A government so small it fits into a vagina.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

No, that is up to the child to decide.

If the student is using different pronouns and names at school - and the teachers, counselors, and other students are using them, the parents must be informed. I would expect other students not to say anything, but the counselor absolutely should inform the parents. Otherwise it is one big deception perpetrated against the parents who have legal responsibility for the child.

If I had to do it again today, my kids would absolutely not attend public school because of the attitudes about parents demonstrated on this board.

I'm a parent, not a teacher.

It is appalling that you want teachers to insert themselves into this situation and "out" these kids to their parents against their will. Such a violation of privacy and potentially traumatizing.

Would you insist on outing gay kids in the same way?

I think there is more active participation by other people (staff and students) with gender identity. Why else would students potentially be getting in trouble for not using the chosen pronouns or name? It is something that forces other people to go along. Being gay doesn't require that. The student doesn't even need to tell a teacher. But if a student is saying that everyone needs to use this pronoun and call me xyz, then that is something that is going to need to be addressed with the parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier as the parent of a trans child but could not bring myself to engage further after this thread truly devolved into meanness and pettiness. I am chiming back in to point you to the story and picture in the post today of a former Republican congresswoman and her trans son. Those of you who insist that this trans man as he currently presents should use the women's room, what would you do if you saw him in there? I can guarantee your first thought would not be that this bearded person who presents as fully male must be a biological woman who totally belongs in the women's room. (I have no idea what his physical situation is obviously, but at least for my son if you pulled down his pants you would still think male not female). Those who support bathroom rules, what do you think about this person in the ladies locker room?

I personally don’t support Youngkin’s bathroom guidelines. However believe that children shouldn’t be socially transitioned by a school without the permission of their parents.

The person transitioning is the child. The school doesn't "transition" anyone. They may support a child by using their preferred pronouns and names, but they aren't "doing" anything.

It would be devastating for some kids if schools were forced to "out" them to their parents. Fortunately, this isn't enforceable by Youngkin.

They may not even be transitioning. They may be trying some thing on to see if it fits. It’s not a road to an absolute certain.

Adding they should be supported and not outed.


We have no idea which parents are unstable.

Not for you to decide. It is for the parents.

Do you understand why many people are abandoning public schools? Because of this crazy mindset of deception.

Do you think it’s ok to “out” kids against their will if it increases the risk of suicide?

Here we go again. Is there a risk of suicide? Or is it no big deal and just like a name change? Which is it? People arguing for APS’ policy can’t switch between the two arguments. It’s either a big deal and not socially transitioning increases the risk of suicide or it’s just like a nickname change. Make up your mind.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time following. Here you go.

Options when kid asks to go by a different name/pronouns at school and doesn't want parents to know. Teacher could:
a) "Out" the kid to their parents against the student's will. Teacher violates the student's privacy and potentially traumatizes them. Student has a higher risk for suicide.
b) Teacher acknowledges and accepts the kid's preference. If kid decides to change name in the future, no harm done. Or at least FAR less impact than suicide.

Got it?

The parents have to know if this is going on. Deception is not the answer here. Stop.

No, that is up to the child to decide.

If the student is using different pronouns and names at school - and the teachers, counselors, and other students are using them, the parents must be informed. I would expect other students not to say anything, but the counselor absolutely should inform the parents. Otherwise it is one big deception perpetrated against the parents who have legal responsibility for the child.

If I had to do it again today, my kids would absolutely not attend public school because of the attitudes about parents demonstrated on this board.

I'm a parent, not a teacher.

It is appalling that you want teachers to insert themselves into this situation and "out" these kids to their parents against their will. Such a violation of privacy and potentially traumatizing.

Would you insist on outing gay kids in the same way?

I think there is more active participation by other people (staff and students) with gender identity. Why else would students potentially be getting in trouble for not using the chosen pronouns or name? It is something that forces other people to go along. Being gay doesn't require that. The student doesn't even need to tell a teacher. But if a student is saying that everyone needs to use this pronoun and call me xyz, then that is something that is going to need to be addressed with the parents.

Why?

[Anonymous]

Not to mention the potential medical intervention that may come with gender exploration. Different than being gay and you should not confuse the two.