I feel completely unappreciated by my kids

[Anonymous]

It is wearing me down- any advice? They are 11 and 13. I SAH and they do make comments like "my job" is so easy and there life is sooo hard- makes me crazy.

[Anonymous]

Make them work.

[Anonymous]

I'm in the same boat-- I work and they complain that I am not raising them and that I dont make enough money. I think kids this age are learning to push our buttons, more than anything. I know they really do love me.

[Anonymous]

Yes, and if they work hard at their lives then maybe some day they too, can become SAH moms for unappreciative children just like they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make them work.

+1 and stop doing the little extras for them.

[Anonymous]

It will pass. Time to starting giving them more responsibility for themselves, like doing their laundry, cooking for themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It will pass. Time to starting giving them more responsibility for themselves, like doing their laundry, cooking for themselves.

This. I didn't do laundry at that age (my mom was paranoid I'd do it wrong) and I'm still bad at it and hate it. I was responsible for starting dinner and making a salad and setting the table and clearing. On weekends she and I would scrub the toilets and bathrooms together and it would be much faster. She WOH trough and she and dad came home around 6 everyday. I learned to cook well and fast and I can wash a bathroom very quickly and efficiently

[Anonymous]

Get a job and stop doing everything for them. That will solve it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is wearing me down- any advice? They are 11 and 13. I SAH and they do make comments like "my job" is so easy and there life is sooo hard- makes me crazy.

This has to be a troll. OP kids are teens. What exactly does she do most days?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a job and stop doing everything for them. That will solve it.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get a job and stop doing everything for them. That will solve it.

+1

+ everything

[Anonymous]

Not every parent can work, so stop suggesting this is the only solution.

My mother stayed home and I never thought to criticize that she was not working or had it easier than me. It's an economy of a certain kind to look after one's house, as well as a luxury to spend time managing one's family. Of course, teens who need personal space may not appreciate that, and you have to explain it to them.

At the same time, high school is very stressful, and I think you would do well to acknowledge that, and perhaps tell your own stressful high school stories. Teens need to feel validated and appreciated too.

Don't worry. One day, they will understand.

[Anonymous]

Chores are a good idea independent of their attitude.

But aren't most teens convinced that they have it harder than anyone ever? I know I was, and I just thought it was part of normal teen behavior.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Oops, PP again - I see now that your children are in middle school. My son is 11 and would never dream of saying those things. He understands my job isn't that easy. We outsource nothing and I do it all, plus attention from me in the afternoon which he and his siblings still appreciate, plus my volunteering hours. It's not hard work, but it's still work, and people need to respect that.

Do your children have chores? That may put things into perspective as well.