DC Urban Moms Farce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Exactly -- who does their own errands, anyway? That's why I contract out everything I possibly can.

Housekeeping, lawn, errands ... sleep training, thank you note-writing, sex with DH, ....

Good god, how much do you pay the housekeeper, anyway?

Actually, it's the guy who does our yardwork. DH and I share him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you people up posting at this hour? I thought everyone was having mind-blowing sex with their model-gorgeous husbands. ?

DH fell asleep after the mind-blowing sex. I'm up writing thank you notes.

Thank God they're not pre-printed!

We do use pre-printed thanks yous to acknowledge gifts given to DC after hosting his elaborate birthday parties. After all, why put more pressure on our little one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does everyone know that there are some mothers who will take their DC on an errand without another adult to help them? I would NEVER do this. It requires you to leave your child in the car unattended!!!! If I take DC somewhere by myself, who is going to sit in the car with him after I strap him into his car seat? I mean, I have to strap him in and then walk around the car to get in the driver seat. That leaves DC in the car alone. Not to mention, when you get to your destination, you have to get out of the driver's seat and walk around to unbuckle DC's car seat... thus leaving DC alone in the car AGAIN while you walk around the car to the back seat. Yet, some mothers do this all the time. I hope they all get arrested. How hard is it to only go places when your DH is with you, or to hire a driving companion? Why have kids if you are going to place them in harm's way?

Good Lord! You actually drive yourself around? Was your chauffeur on vacation?

[Anonymous]

What a bunch of cattey bitches. You're sorry asses. I hate you're sorry asses you no good SAHM leeches.

Sorry cattey bitches.

I'll say it one more time - I hate you're sorry asses.

[Anonymous]

And...we...hate...yours....

[Anonymous]

The working ones are overpaid lawyers.

[Anonymous]

I sometimes leave DC alone while i go into another room. Is that illegal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sometimes leave DC alone while i go into another room. Is that illegal?

Only if someone can see you do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sometimes leave DC alone while i go into another room. Is that illegal?

Only if someone can see you do it.

Only if you admit it or are selected for a cabinet position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What a bunch of cattey bitches. You're sorry asses. I hate you're sorry asses you no good SAHM leeches.

Sorry cattey bitches.

I'll say it one more time - I hate you're sorry asses.

Who taught you to spell? I mean, at least use spell-check.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sometimes leave DC alone while i go into another room. Is that illegal?

If you wanted to have more than one room, you should never have had kids. Sorry-assed bitch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What a bunch of cattey bitches. You're sorry asses. I hate you're sorry asses you no good SAHM leeches.

Sorry cattey bitches.

I'll say it one more time - I hate you're sorry asses.

Who taught you to spell? I mean, at least use spell-check.

It's I hate your sorry asses. It's catty bitches. Bozo. Your punctuation sucks.

[Anonymous]

Ok, now I am officially terrified to take my child to the local park. I'll be easy to spot...the one cowering off to herself because she's terrified of the other moms. Are moms in this area really this crazy? I know this thread is meant to be funny but I've seen some pretty nasty comments on other threads here. Is all this saved for the forums or am I going to encounter this kind of stuff at the playground too. I'm not tough enough for this city.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok, now I am officially terrified to take my child to the local park. I'll be easy to spot...the one cowering off to herself because she's terrified of the other moms. Are moms in this area really this crazy? I know this thread is meant to be funny but I've seen some pretty nasty comments on other threads here. Is all this saved for the forums or am I going to encounter this kind of stuff at the playground too. I'm not tough enough for this city.

Do you know what farce means?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sometimes leave DC alone while i go into another room. Is that illegal?

Ok...go ahead and do it. I challenge you to leave your child in another room in front a police officer in ANY state....and find out what happens...report back to us.