Getting anything done on weekends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

I mean I'm just getting the sense that people on this board don't really go to church religiously. Which is ok, it is just answering the question of how everyone seems to have so much more time than me on the weekends. Church is at 11am. I can't change that time and create evening church? I've never gone to a church with an evening service; maybe that is just my denomination. I would never get a babysitter for church because the kids go to church and the older one goes to Sunday school.

No, I don’t go to church, but if I did, I would set up the rest of my weekend to be more kid-centered.

OP, you’re so reluctant to accept any advice (including the many other bolded ideas I shared below), but focus on reasons why you can’t change what you’re doing. So what do you want? A pat on the back? Here you go... pat, pat, parenting is hard.

Anonymous wrote:

Have you been screened for PPD or just regular depression? Honestly, the fact that your day is "basically over" after lunch / nap is weird. I mean, yeah, when you've got kids under 4, you have to split weekend days into two segments.

My suggestion to you is to stop trying to do the grown-up stuff (gym, church) at the time when the kids are fully rested and ready to go. You fit in the KID activities early in the morning when they have energy (7-noon is prime kid activity time... go out for early breakfast, visit parks, museums, the pool, the zoo, etc.), THEN home for lunch / nap.

PM is when you hang out around the house and grown-ups switch off so one can get things done while the other is on kid duty. And that doesn't mean one's on kid duty while the other cooks dinner. It means that the person on kid duty cooks dinner. And simplify your dinners. We mostly eat large breakfasts and lunches or brunches on the weekend and dinner is something simple and easy (pizza delivery, something frozen, etc.). So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

Honestly, I try to fit in all my errands and chores on weekdays so I don't have to spend my weekends working. Except for Lowe's. Kids love Lowe's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Out of all the replies here, THIS one -- which basically told you that you are SOL for the next three years -- is the one you found helpful?? I mean, sure, PPs could have been nicer, but you actually got a lot of helpful advice and tips about how to structure your week, etc. to find more time and feel more relaxed during your weekends.

Yeah everyone telling me to quit going to the gym and take walks with the stroller, instead and to switch to Catholicism because they have evening mass, those were not particularly helpful comments. I wasn't really asking for help reconfiguring my schedule, which is currently (mostly) working for me for the moment (until we start adding anything else in). It is hectic, but I didn't say I wasn't getting stuff done. My actual questions were: "What do weekend schedules looks like for other people with young kids?" and "What falls away for you when the weekends get busy?" So yeah, some replies were more helpful than others.

If your schedule is currently working for you, why are you posting?

Nobody suggested switching to Catholicism.

Many people suggested ways to streamline (eg., errands during the week) or how to prioritize kid & family time in the morning and / or personal time in the evening. The errands and chores you listed are hardly a blip on my radar, because I automate them, delegate them, or de-prioritize them.

But you’re not open to advice, because apparently you weren’t asking for advice. Bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Single mom, so different schedule and no trade offs:

6:30/7 both up
7-8 potty/shower/hygiene/breakfast
8-9 self play while I clean up from the week/breakfast and pack snacks and lunch
9-2:30 out of the house for activity (pool/farm/soccer/ museum/whatever
2:30-4:30 kid car naps and I pay bills/order groceries online/social media
4:30-5:30 playground
5:30-7 cook/eat dinner/read books/play
7-8 bed prep and attempt to convince to sleep
8-9 laundry/other cleaning
9-11 my tv time. Too tired to do the additional stuff I really should do
4:30-5:30

[Anonymous]

Two kids - a 2 yr old who takes a PM nap and a non-napping 6 yo.

DH and I go to gym on weekday mornings. On weekday evenings after kids are asleep, we: order groceries and receive the delivery, do all bill-paying and whatever other "paper work" stuff that crops up, and do most laundry. We minimize errands by ordering online pretty much anything that can be. We have a cleaning lady. I also have a job where I can steal chunks of time to get non-work stuff done or run an occasional errand during the week.

Weekends - DH goes for early morning run on Saturday; I go for one on Sunday. No gym. Almost no errands (exception would be like something related to the car or maybe a home repair.) No housework, other than tidying up after ourselves. Saturday morning before nap is typically a bigger outing -- zoo, museum, pool, hike, festival, that kind of thing. Then nap for 2 yo, during which parents do something quiet at-home with 6 yo. Often its popping popcorn and snuggling up for a movie, but also sometimes something crafty. After nap, back out but for something more low-key -- walk or bike ride around neighborhood, play at a playground, etc. Sundays my kids have swim class, which we follow up with brunch. After that it's kind of whatever...but see above that it is not errands, housework, etc. Never have issues fitting in bday parties or playdates. We like to eat out a lot on weekends, and also like to cook nicer dinners. We're typically on-time for my 2 yo's nap, but she's not one to fall apart if its a bit later on weekends; same with her bedtimes.

[Anonymous]

OP, what’s your denomination?

[Anonymous]

Depending upon how good of a swimmer the 4 year old the parent who is not working out can take the kids. Or the parent who is not working out first can do wake up/breakfast duty and bring them to the gym and the parent who worked out can swim with them at the gym (I'm assuming that your gym has a pool).

Prior to my getting pregnant and literally needing to sleep a gazillion hours every night I would work out before my daughter woke up on the weekends, so we only needed to fit in my husband's workout. When I have to work on the weekends or he does that we tag team going to the park or a museum or somewhere else in the afternoon and morning. But yes, weekends can kind of drag. We plan a date night for the weekend (we actually bring our kids, so date may be a misnomer) and then grill the other night. Our kids go to bed at 8 pm, so we have the evening to hang out or work depending upon the time of year.

[Anonymous]

M-F:

Everyone up at 6. DS eats breakfast & watches TV, DH rides stationary bike, I go for a walk.
7-8, everyone gets dressed & ready for work / school.
8-3, I work, do random chores, run occasional errands 3-5.
8-5, DH works, does random chores, runs occasional errands on lunch break.
Online shopping, bill pay, etc.
5-8 some combo. of kid activities, dinner, bath.
8-11 grown ups have personal time

Weekends:
DS & 1 parent wake around 6, eat breakfast, drink coffee, putz around house
9-3, either:
1) family stuff—pool, park, museums, birthday parties, family visits, play dates, etc.; or,
2) one parent does stuff (yoga, bike ride, errand, housework, grown-up hanging out) and other does kid stuff

3-5 usually quiet time, a movie, stuff around the house

5-8, same as weekdays

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's hard particularly when the kids are at the young years. Even now, we do a lot of "divide and conquer" on weekends so that one parent can take care of family chores (bills, cleaning, errands that aren't good to have kids around for) and the other parent can care for the kids. We'd like to have more family time, but it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Can you do gym after church on Sundays? That would open up your whole Saturday. Sunday Church, lunch, hit grocery store on way home from church (can you take 2 cars?), then you and hubby trade off who goes to gym while kids nap.

Now whole Saturday opened up. If you and DH want to get out of house together to recreate, hire Saturday sitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, what’s your denomination?

Methodist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what’s your denomination?

Methodist

NP- I'm Episcopalian. Every church I've ever attended has had an 8ish and 10ish service. There are no other options. Saturday night isn't a thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what’s your denomination?

Methodist

NP- I'm Episcopalian. Every church I've ever attended has had an 8ish and 10ish service. There are no other options. Saturday night isn't a thing.

Pre-COVID ours had a 9:30am and an 11am, and they were different "styles." Sunday school and most of the families went to the 11am. It is so late in the day! I feel like it makes it hard to do anything else, and since they always run late we don't leave until like 12:30 and it is always encroaching on lunch time, even on a good day. I was kind of church-shopping before COVID hit and am feeling like it this might be a natural time to make a break either way. I don't think any of the options will be Saturday nights, though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what’s your denomination?

Methodist

For the record I am the poster that listed out my mom's Catholic ceremonies and I was not telling you to convert to Catholicism, I just have always had the option to attend a variety of mass times my whole life.

It seems strange and antithetical to the idea of encouraging devoted worship for a parish to hold only one service a week but I don't know much about Methodists. I found one in McLean that also offers and 8:30am service but honestly my mind is kind of blown by how restricted they were in my cursory google. But I was never suggesting you convert to Catholicism and I don't think a single other poster said that either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, what’s your denomination?

Methodist

Okay, the first three hits when I Googled “Methodist services in DC” came up with a range of services from 9 am to 7 pm.
Here’s one suggestion: be open to suggestions.


9 or 1030: https://nationalchurch.org/worship-in-person

930, 11, or 7: https://chumc.net/

10 or 5: https://www.asburyumcdc.org/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Out of all the replies here, THIS one -- which basically told you that you are SOL for the next three years -- is the one you found helpful?? I mean, sure, PPs could have been nicer, but you actually got a lot of helpful advice and tips about how to structure your week, etc. to find more time and feel more relaxed during your weekends.

Yeah everyone telling me to quit going to the gym and take walks with the stroller, instead and to switch to Catholicism because they have evening mass, those were not particularly helpful comments. I wasn't really asking for help reconfiguring my schedule, which is currently (mostly) working for me for the moment (until we start adding anything else in). It is hectic, but I didn't say I wasn't getting stuff done. My actual questions were: "What do weekend schedules looks like for other people with young kids?" and "What falls away for you when the weekends get busy?" So yeah, some replies were more helpful than others.

If your schedule is currently working for you, why are you posting?

Nobody suggested switching to Catholicism.

Many people suggested ways to streamline (eg., errands during the week) or how to prioritize kid & family time in the morning and / or personal time in the evening. The errands and chores you listed are hardly a blip on my radar, because I automate them, delegate them, or de-prioritize them.

But you’re not open to advice, because apparently you weren’t asking for advice. Bizarre.

I'm a PP and also so confused. You are upset that people responded. Why did you post, OP?