Getting anything done on weekends

[Anonymous]

I'm confused about why your day is over at nap time. My youngest naps from 1-3. You can do a lot from 3pm until bedtime!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woah, I forgot how mean this forum can be.

Would love recs for gyms with child care in DC! I keep hearing people say this but I don't know of one that actually exists. Ours isn't open at 6am. I understand that this is a schedule that will likely need to change at some point, and I'm not complaining, I'm just looking to see what other people do.

Of course we get up before 9 am - we get dressed, eat breakfast, and then get ready and leave the house.

For naps, our little kid naps from 12:30 or 1pm to 3/3:30. The big kid "rests" from 1:30 or 2-3pm. So we really only have an hour when they're both down. When the big kid is up he has trouble playing independently, and wants all our attention, so it is hard to get things done (especially things that require a computer, like online shopping or paying bills). This is something we're working on with him, but we can only do so much.

We are kind of making it work at the moment, but it often involves skipping church (even virtual church) and having one parent take the kids out of the house so the other can get things done uninterrupted. It is just exhausting and I can't imagine adding anything else in! Just looking to see how others make things work with kids in this age range.

Literally no one has been mean to you, OP. They have given you suggestions on how you can change your schedule.

One thing I've noticed is the bolded. You don't both have to play with your kids. One of you take the kids on and the other one goes and gets something done. And why do the kids have to be OUT of the house in order for you to get something done? Go into a room with a closed door or a different floor and ask your partner to keep them away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We really only have two weekend activities and our weekends always seem packed and not restful. Saturdays - adults go to the gym, trade off who is watching the kids while the other works out. Only day either of us can get to the gym, takes from 9-11:30 or so. Come home for lunch, then naps. Day is basically over. Sunday - hoping to get back to church now that things are reopening. Brunch out or home for lunch, naps. Day is then basically over. Kids are 1.5 and 4.

I know eventually there are other obligations, especially as the kids get older (birthday parties, sports, etc). What do weekend schedules looks like for other people with young kids? I'm constantly struggling to find time to tidy up the house, do projects around the house, take the car for an oil change, pay bills, whatever. Is this just life? What falls away for you when the weekends get busy?

Have you been screened for PPD or just regular depression? Honestly, the fact that your day is "basically over" after lunch / nap is weird. I mean, yeah, when you've got kids under 4, you have to split weekend days into two segments.

My suggestion to you is to stop trying to do the grown-up stuff (gym, church) at the time when the kids are fully rested and ready to go. You fit in the KID activities early in the morning when they have energy (7-noon is prime kid activity time... go out for early breakfast, visit parks, museums, the pool, the zoo, etc.), THEN home for lunch / nap.

PM is when you hang out around the house and grown-ups switch off so one can get things done while the other is on kid duty. And that doesn't mean one's on kid duty while the other cooks dinner. It means that the person on kid duty cooks dinner. And simplify your dinners. We mostly eat large breakfasts and lunches or brunches on the weekend and dinner is something simple and easy (pizza delivery, something frozen, etc.). So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

Honestly, I try to fit in all my errands and chores on weekdays so I don't have to spend my weekends working. Except for Lowe's. Kids love Lowe's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We really only have two weekend activities and our weekends always seem packed and not restful. Saturdays - adults go to the gym, trade off who is watching the kids while the other works out. Only day either of us can get to the gym, takes from 9-11:30 or so. Come home for lunch, then naps. Day is basically over. Sunday - hoping to get back to church now that things are reopening. Brunch out or home for lunch, naps. Day is then basically over. Kids are 1.5 and 4.

I know eventually there are other obligations, especially as the kids get older (birthday parties, sports, etc). What do weekend schedules looks like for other people with young kids? I'm constantly struggling to find time to tidy up the house, do projects around the house, take the car for an oil change, pay bills, whatever. Is this just life? What falls away for you when the weekends get busy?

Have you been screened for PPD or just regular depression? Honestly, the fact that your day is "basically over" after lunch / nap is weird. I mean, yeah, when you've got kids under 4, you have to split weekend days into two segments.

My suggestion to you is to stop trying to do the grown-up stuff (gym, church) at the time when the kids are fully rested and ready to go. You fit in the KID activities early in the morning when they have energy (7-noon is prime kid activity time... go out for early breakfast, visit parks, museums, the pool, the zoo, etc.), THEN home for lunch / nap.

PM is when you hang out around the house and grown-ups switch off so one can get things done while the other is on kid duty. And that doesn't mean one's on kid duty while the other cooks dinner. It means that the person on kid duty cooks dinner. And simplify your dinners. We mostly eat large breakfasts and lunches or brunches on the weekend and dinner is something simple and easy (pizza delivery, something frozen, etc.). So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

Honestly, I try to fit in all my errands and chores on weekdays so I don't have to spend my weekends working. Except for Lowe's. Kids love Lowe's.

This PP makes a really good point - we do SO MUCH before lunch and some stuff after nap.

Yesterday, for example.

7:30-8:30 - Kids played with their dolls and other toys while DH and I snoozed
8:30-9:30 - I got up and helped them brush teeth and get dressed, then they watched a couple shows while I made coffee and breakfast (Sunday is DH's sleep-in day, I get Saturdays. You could easily make this gym time if you guys don't want to sleep in)
9:30-10:30 - They ate breakfast, then played and did some drawing/coloring while I drank my coffee and looked at some stuff online (I bought some clothes for them because older DD's shorts are getting tight). DH got up and got ready somewhere in there.
10:30 - 12:30 - We got everyone dressed, sunscreened, and went to the pool for about an hour and a half
12:30-1:30 - We picked up some lunch on the way home, kids ate and got ready for nap/rest-time
1:30-3:30 - Nap/rest time - I threw a couple loads in, cleaned up the kitchen, made my to do list for today
3:30 - 4:30 - We all ran to Target to pick up a few things
4:30 - 6:00 - Kids played, DH made dinner
6:00 - 7:30 - Dinner, playtime, FaceTime with grandparents
7:30 - 8:00 - Got them ready for bed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

I mean I'm just getting the sense that people on this board don't really go to church religiously. Which is ok, it is just answering the question of how everyone seems to have so much more time than me on the weekends. Church is at 11am. I can't change that time and create evening church? I've never gone to a church with an evening service; maybe that is just my denomination. I would never get a babysitter for church because the kids go to church and the older one goes to Sunday school.

[Anonymous]

OP, you have kids. Be grateful for the naps. What are you doing during naps?

What do you want? Your kids might have to be around while you “get stuff done.”

[Anonymous]

I have a 1 and 2 year old. We are PSYCHOTIC about them being in their bed, asleep at 7 pm. They don't co-sleep, they don't get out of bed to ask for water a million times. So we have from 7-11 or so every night to do whatever, mostly fold laundry, get stuff done online, pursue hobbies, finish working for the day. Four hours a day is a lot!

[Anonymous]

We use nap time and the time after the kids go to bed to get things done. On the weekdays that gives us about 2 hours free at night, on the weekends it’s about 4-5 hours total per day . I try to get routine chores done during that time on weekdays and I don’t aim for perfection.

[Anonymous]

We get a lot done on the weekends but my 5 and 3yos don't really nap. After breakfast we do something in the morning, like go to the pool or the park or to see a friend. One of us may work out or go to the grocery store during this time. Then lunch, then an afternoon activity if we feel like it or have plans (other parent may work out then or go to the grocery store). Then late afternoon the kids chill and watch a movie and we can do some work or use the peloton or do some gardening or working out or grocery shopping or whatever. Then dinner, kids' bed, then DH and I have alone time or occasionally see friends (either one at a time or with a babysitter). We do a lot of dividing and conquering but also do some things all together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We get a lot done on the weekends but my 5 and 3yos don't really nap. After breakfast we do something in the morning, like go to the pool or the park or to see a friend. One of us may work out or go to the grocery store during this time. Then lunch, then an afternoon activity if we feel like it or have plans (other parent may work out then or go to the grocery store). Then late afternoon the kids chill and watch a movie and we can do some work or use the peloton or do some gardening or working out or grocery shopping or whatever. Then dinner, kids' bed, then DH and I have alone time or occasionally see friends (either one at a time or with a babysitter). We do a lot of dividing and conquering but also do some things all together.

P.S. We also have cleaning people once a week and a Roomba that we run every day. The kids are responsible for picking up their stuff so the Roomba can run. I do laundry on the weekend and fold it one weekday at lunch when I have time (kids are at camp).

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. I feel like you. It's constant. It's hard to fit everything in and there's things you don't get to on a weekend that you maybe wanted to. We do prioritize church, but to make that shorter, we found a church where kids can go to fun, child-oriented Sunday school while parents can go to a service. This makes it a one hour event, not two. Honestly, even without children the weekends can fly by. But with kids, the series of activities is a constant go from eating, to playground/outdoor activities, to napping, to eating again, to swimming, to bathtime, to eating dinner. It's a whirl. It's a fun whirl, but it is difficult to get all the errands done and be ready for back to work again on Monday. I get it OP. That's how it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We really only have two weekend activities and our weekends always seem packed and not restful. Saturdays - adults go to the gym, trade off who is watching the kids while the other works out. Only day either of us can get to the gym, takes from 9-11:30 or so. Come home for lunch, then naps. Day is basically over. Sunday - hoping to get back to church now that things are reopening. Brunch out or home for lunch, naps. Day is then basically over. Kids are 1.5 and 4.

I know eventually there are other obligations, especially as the kids get older (birthday parties, sports, etc). What do weekend schedules looks like for other people with young kids? I'm constantly struggling to find time to tidy up the house, do projects around the house, take the car for an oil change, pay bills, whatever. Is this just life? What falls away for you when the weekends get busy?

This is why so many people want to WFH. It allows small things to be done during the work week so it doesn’t all fall on the weekend. As to your question, we don’t go to church, and the day isn’t over after naptime. We also pretty consistently had one parent take kids somewhere (activities, birthday parties, something else) while other parent does house stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So maybe Saturdays y'all switch of afternoon gym time and on Sundays one of you can do some shopping or chores while the other one does evening church. Or get a babysitter for church.

I mean I'm just getting the sense that people on this board don't really go to church religiously. Which is ok, it is just answering the question of how everyone seems to have so much more time than me on the weekends. Church is at 11am. I can't change that time and create evening church? I've never gone to a church with an evening service; maybe that is just my denomination. I would never get a babysitter for church because the kids go to church and the older one goes to Sunday school.

I mean I do not go to church but I grew up Catholic very involved and in Catholic school and going to church and I've never been to a church with just a single mass time so that is bizarre. And my grandmother went to evening mass on Wednesdays my entire life. I just looked up the mass schedule at my mom's church and there is mass at 7am/9am/11/am and 5pm on Sundays in addition to 5pm masses on Saturday and 7:30 and 9am masses M-F.

If I wanted to get my kids to mass on Sundays, I would try to get them to the earliest possible one so I could act like it was a normal day in terms of getting everyone up and at em and out the door.

But I mean, of course if you are devoting 25% of the weekend to religious activities that will eat up a substantial amount of time. For an 11am mass with sunday school for the oldest you are giving half of every Sunday minimum to Church. Which again, that is fine, but if you instead went to the 5pm Saturday and made a tradition of ordering pizza on Saturday nights afterwards than you would be giving 2 hours instead of a weekend morning which is prime time.

[Anonymous]

Sport and Health - Capitol Hill has daycare

[Anonymous]

I do a lot of the online stuff at work. Does no one else do this? Am I a terrible employee?
I also take the car in to get the oil changed on the way to work.

I do agree that your schedule looks a little boring for the kids. I would plan something fun with my non-napper during the baby’s nap and take them out a bit more!