Step parents in blended families, what is the answer to "is he your only child?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it Op. You are the step mom.

Op again. None of us like “stepchild” or “stepmom”.

the older kids? how old were they when you married their dad? I highly doubt they have an issue with it.

Yes the older kids. They were under ten. They don’t like the phrase.

yeah, not buying it ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it Op. You are the step mom.

Op again. None of us like “stepchild” or “stepmom”.

the older kids? how old were they when you married their dad? I highly doubt they have an issue with it.

Yes the older kids. They were under ten. They don’t like the phrase.

yeah, not buying it ...

Look just because you are a loser and think people would come to this forum to make up fake emotions between step parents and step kids, but guess what not everyone is a loser like you.

[Anonymous]

You don't need to use the words "yes" or "no". You can just say "I also have two great step kids in college."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it Op. You are the step mom.

Op again. None of us like “stepchild” or “stepmom”.

the older kids? how old were they when you married their dad? I highly doubt they have an issue with it.

Yes the older kids. They were under ten. They don’t like the phrase.

yeah, not buying it ...

Look just because you are a loser and think people would come to this forum to make up fake emotions between step parents and step kids, but guess what not everyone is a loser like you.

Yeah, I'm totally sure that OP's adult step-children fret about how "Oh, step-mother just does not express the feeling I have for OP! What ever shall we call Step Mommie Dearest?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get over it Op. You are the step mom.

Op again. None of us like “stepchild” or “stepmom”.

the older kids? how old were they when you married their dad? I highly doubt they have an issue with it.

Yes the older kids. They were under ten. They don’t like the phrase.

Then the kids have told you what they prefer - the answer is “we have two more but they’re in college.” People will figure it out and it’s mostly none of their business so they shouldn’t be nitpicking. I think it would be weird for your kid to say yes to “is he your only?” Your kid knows he has siblings so why would you erase them in these conversations?

[Anonymous]

Several of my friends call their step-kids their "bonus kids". Which I really like because it sounds so much more loving and friendly than "step-kid."

I have a brother, a sister, a step-brother, a step-sister and a half-brother. Sometimes when people ask I just say I'm one of 6. If it comes up, I'll go into more detail. But they're just my family.

[Anonymous]

"he's my only biological child. I have two other children by marriage."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I have one bio child (6), but we have two stepchildren, now in college, who we shared custody with growing up. We have a positive relationship, they spend their holidays and summers with us, and everyone seems happy to have a strong sibling relationship. People often ask if DS is my only child. I don't want to say yes because it feels somehow like I don't think of my step children as part of our family, and that is not how I feel. I don't say "no - we have two older kids" because I didn't raise them and the idea that I am a mom of three kids isn't really accurate. I always say something like "yes, but my DH has two children as well - they are in college". What is a better way to answer this question?

I say "I have one and my husband has two" and it goes on to explain boy, girl, age/grade etc. I think you answered just fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I have one bio child (6), but we have two stepchildren, now in college, who we shared custody with growing up. We have a positive relationship, they spend their holidays and summers with us, and everyone seems happy to have a strong sibling relationship. People often ask if DS is my only child. I don't want to say yes because it feels somehow like I don't think of my step children as part of our family, and that is not how I feel. I don't say "no - we have two older kids" because I didn't raise them and the idea that I am a mom of three kids isn't really accurate. I always say something like "yes, but my DH has two children as well - they are in college". What is a better way to answer this question?

I say "I have one and my husband has two" and it goes on to explain boy, girl, age/grade etc. I think you answered just fine.

But her husband has 3 kids. The youngest is the result of their marriage.

[Anonymous]

I married a man with three young children and then we had two together and the total age gap is only ten years. He had primary custody so they spent almost all of their time with us. Initially I referred to them as my stepchildren but after a few years I just referred to them as our children. The real trigger was when the youngest started calling me Mom.

[Anonymous]

I have six siblings. My two oldest are actually half siblings. Their father was not in actively involved.
My youngest brother is 23 and 20 years younger than the oldest.
He was ten before he realized this. A counselor referred to them as half siblings for the first time in his life.

So my father’s answer obviously was always inclusive of all children.

[Anonymous]

I would say “No, Larlo Jr. has two college-aged siblings from Larlo Sr.’s first marriage. Larlo Jr. is the only one living at home full time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd say, "I'm also a step mom to two. They're in college now."

This. Or, a variation:

DH and I have one DC together, and I've been stepmom to DH's older two kids since they were little.

I get that this isn't about you, it's about being inclusive to the two older kids and I applaud that. So often people want to discount the step kids, and the step kids feel that.