Embarrassed at school function re my partier teen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have grappled with the marijuana issue with my teens and therapists. I have come down to: we do not condone it, not in my house, I’ll throw it away if found, it’s illegal so know that’s a huge risk and we aren’t hiring a fancy lawyer to help you, no driving while using, nothing in the car.l, grades have to stay good. I have one teen that uses about once every weekend or so depending on his sport, and one that doesn’t at all. I talk to them openly about health, mental and physical risks. I tell them what to look out for in terms of addication or dependency. I make the teen who uses see his therapist every few weeks to make sure he’s learning other tools to deal with stressors.

I did the whole take everything away, search the room, punish, rinse and repeat. It was ineffective.

His therapist told me 90 percent of teens that go to rehab for weed it fails. So I have come to terms with the fact he’s going to use recreationally and to keep our communication open and consequences for additional harm (driving, grades suffering, weekday use, etc.) basically a “harm reduction model”. It’s working for us. I Respect that many have different views and do my best to stay in my lane. FWIW

You are condoning it! You are clearly ok with it.

It’s not binary to me but I understand it may be to you and others and that’s fine.

You are basically saying if we don't see it and your grades are ok, then that's fine. Its not ok. They are using and you are letting them drive and just saying oh,, if you are high, please don't drive...you don't need to talk addiction. They are addicted.

Jeez every kid that drinks is not an alcoholic and every kid that uses marijuana is not an addict. Addiction feeds off of secrecy so the more honest and aware approach may be preferable. But it clearly scares you , so parent as you see fit and others will parent as they see fit.