RANT - I Hate the PTA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is how teacher appreciation week works.

But why does it work that way? Because PTA parents design it that way. There's no reason it has to work that way.

--Teacher, also a parent, so I've seen it from both sides and think it's ridiculous

I wonder if the PTA would listen if the teachers told them to stop.

Op, either you or your spouse, if you have one, could pick up a Thank you card. Write a note in it and send it. Then be done.

Yes, you probably *could have* grabbed muffins at the store and sent them the day before but you didn't. Oh well. Nobody is going to feel less appreciated.

Go about your week. At one point I was the only single mom in ds's class. I did what I could and left everything else.

At my school, both teachers and administrators asked the pto to please not do the week long over the top thing. They asked for things to be more spread out. The pto didn't listen.

Wow. How's that for "teacher appreciation"?

[Anonymous]

Our PTA does this too. I'm opting out this year and just sending in my gifts to DC's teachers. It's too much. I can't send in breakfast or lunch items each day, set up massage rooms, decorate the teachers' lounge . . . it's just not happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is how teacher appreciation week works.

Not at our school. We have a Teacher Appreciation chair and a few volunteers do things once a month rather then focus it all in one week. There is a lunch on the Friday of TA week that is catered.

[Anonymous]

I stopped doing any thing for teacher appreciation five years ago. Nothing happened. Occasionally my kids will listen to the announcements and make a card on their own. Whatever. I think it’s dumb and too close to the end of the year. I’m a SAHM FWIW.
I think you’re being overly sensitive. She can’t shame you if you just don’t care. I’ll admit it annoys me when people say they don’t have time. I would’ve responded with “it’s not a priority”. Can’t argue with that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PTA mom here who also works. At our pta it’s mostly the working parents who put the most time in. I know each school varies. So please don’t make this a sahm/wohm issue.

You can just do the card and send a box of store bought muffins with your kid the day before and ask them to drop it in the office. Done.

Don’t do anything and don’t worry about it like most parents. 75% of our school doesn’t do a damn thing for pta and if each family contributed just one hour a week to the school, it would make it a hell of a lot easier on those 15 parents who literally do everything because no one else is volunteering.

If you’re that upset about it, go to PTA meetings, offer ideas, offer to run just one event or at least spend one hour a year at the book fair or whatever your school has. Maybe it’ll give you an appreciation of the parents who do so much on their own time.

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

This has nothing to do with working or not. It has to do with finances and how absurd a week is. Our PTA is mostly the working parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PTA mom here who also works. At our pta it’s mostly the working parents who put the most time in. I know each school varies. So please don’t make this a sahm/wohm issue.

You can just do the card and send a box of store bought muffins with your kid the day before and ask them to drop it in the office. Done.

Don’t do anything and don’t worry about it like most parents. 75% of our school doesn’t do a damn thing for pta and if each family contributed just one hour a week to the school, it would make it a hell of a lot easier on those 15 parents who literally do everything because no one else is volunteering.

If you’re that upset about it, go to PTA meetings, offer ideas, offer to run just one event or at least spend one hour a year at the book fair or whatever your school has. Maybe it’ll give you an appreciation of the parents who do so much on their own time.

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

Then you have done your time this year. Send what you want for the week and stop feeling guilty. And stop whining. And figure out why you think this is a SAHM/WOHM thing because it’s not and you are really hung up on that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) grab a flower from your garden
2) ignore this-- everyone brings in food. Or send in some grapes or cookies.
3) Have your kid make a card.
4) Get 2 amazon gift cards -- one for the teacher...
5) and one for the specialist.

You do realize that many people don’t have gardens right?

Then grab one from your neighbors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) grab a flower from your garden
2) ignore this-- everyone brings in food. Or send in some grapes or cookies.
3) Have your kid make a card.
4) Get 2 amazon gift cards -- one for the teacher...
5) and one for the specialist.

You do realize that many people don’t have gardens right?

Then grab one from your neighbors.

In PP's world, all flowers bloom in April and no one lives in an apartment. Must be nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PTA mom here who also works. At our pta it’s mostly the working parents who put the most time in. I know each school varies. So please don’t make this a sahm/wohm issue.

You can just do the card and send a box of store bought muffins with your kid the day before and ask them to drop it in the office. Done.

Don’t do anything and don’t worry about it like most parents. 75% of our school doesn’t do a damn thing for pta and if each family contributed just one hour a week to the school, it would make it a hell of a lot easier on those 15 parents who literally do everything because no one else is volunteering.

If you’re that upset about it, go to PTA meetings, offer ideas, offer to run just one event or at least spend one hour a year at the book fair or whatever your school has. Maybe it’ll give you an appreciation of the parents who do so much on their own time.

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

Then you have done your time this year. Send what you want for the week and stop feeling guilty. And stop whining. And figure out why you think this is a SAHM/WOHM thing because it’s not and you are really hung up on that.

+1. Are you a private school parent OP? Because my kid’s private preschool had a teacher appreciation week like this, but in public school our pTA has always been made up of very committed individuals who are also very respectful of people’s time.

[Anonymous]

At our school they recommended kids write letters to promote the county spending money on education. All letters to be collected by the PTA before distribution. If they didn't want to see who wrote the letters, they would have asked that people just do this on their own.

[Anonymous]

OP has issues far beyond PTA..

With her busy schedule I'm surprised she has the time of brain power to give this a second thought, nevermind post about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree completely OP. I can’t imagine that question would have been asked of a dad. It’s more unnecessary expectations on women by women. I appreciate the women (usually it’s women) who step up to be on the pta but I wish they would be mindful of creating unnecessary sh*t to do. Unnecessary because I don’t think the teachers even care about this stuff.

Thank you for getting my point. There were two dads standing nearby at the time, and neither one of them is bringing anything either, but no asked them or shamed them for not doing so.

And in my house, both DH and I work FT. DH is the one who got the flowers for the teachers today, since he does the grocery shopping each week. He also culled through our kids' old books for donations. I took care of the treats for the teachers.

DH is also more involved in PTA than I am. I'm fairly certain that he is recognizable to almost everyone who has volunteered/worked at the ES, even though he does not have a PTA Board position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP has issues far beyond PTA..

With her busy schedule I'm surprised she has the time of brain power to give this a second thought, nevermind post about it.

What are you talking about? She thinks it is a lot of work. That is all. Stop projecting. You sound very judgmental yourself.

[Anonymous]

One mom friend I know used to say, "Our family is handling this on their own," in a firm and classy voice.

I don't know if she dropped off a $10 gift card or a lobster dinner.

I respected her way of setting a boundary, though.

My trick is to text DH a list, and always have frozen quiche on hand. Potluck, brunch, flu....quiche quiche quiche.

Do what you feel is good for your family.

Your teachers don't want you to stressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PTA mom here who also works. At our pta it’s mostly the working parents who put the most time in. I know each school varies. So please don’t make this a sahm/wohm issue.

You can just do the card and send a box of store bought muffins with your kid the day before and ask them to drop it in the office. Done.

Don’t do anything and don’t worry about it like most parents. 75% of our school doesn’t do a damn thing for pta and if each family contributed just one hour a week to the school, it would make it a hell of a lot easier on those 15 parents who literally do everything because no one else is volunteering.

If you’re that upset about it, go to PTA meetings, offer ideas, offer to run just one event or at least spend one hour a year at the book fair or whatever your school has. Maybe it’ll give you an appreciation of the parents who do so much on their own time.

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

Okay, then you just need to Practice a response. “Can’t do the food thing this time around, Karen!”