RANT - I Hate the PTA

[Anonymous]

OP is just a low class leech.

[Anonymous]

Macrobdella decora.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our PTA has ever so helpfully organized teacher appreciation week into a 5 day ordeal of holly homemaker hell. They have given us a different assignment for each day of the week - day 1, bring in 1 flower for the teacher, day 2 bring in food for a 7am breakfast, day 3 have a your child make a card for the teacher, day 4 get your teacher something from a "wish list" and day 5 bring in a gift for a specialist.

I have 3 jobs, I am running on 5 hours sleep, and I don't have a nanny, housekeeper, or even a babysitter, and one of these women - the kind that hasn't worked a day in 20 years but whines constantly about how hard it is being a stay-at-home mom, asks me what I'm bringing to the breakfast, and I say NOTHING. I am at work at 7am and don't have time, and she says - everyone is busy, you just have to make time!

What is wrong with these women? This is one more domestic expectation that seems to be forced only on women, regardless of whether or not we work as much as men. PTA is a tool of oppression and I want to punch it in the face.

I have organized teacher appreciation week while part of the PTA and I worked full time as did all the other moms.

The ideas you listed are canned and available easily by google. We had a similar list when I did PTA.

Btw no one is keeping count if you bring stuff

Flower - make a paper flower - kill 2 birds with one stone - have your kid write a thank you on it
Breakfast - buy a pack of muffins or box of granola bars, send to school with your child in a bag that says PTA and tell child to give to office or teacher.
Wish lists for teacher/specialist - amazon gc, regift a gift card you haven't used and have no plan to do so, or nothing ( really no ones counting or checking if you do it or not)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our PTA has ever so helpfully organized teacher appreciation week into a 5 day ordeal of holly homemaker hell. They have given us a different assignment for each day of the week - day 1, bring in 1 flower for the teacher, day 2 bring in food for a 7am breakfast, day 3 have a your child make a card for the teacher, day 4 get your teacher something from a "wish list" and day 5 bring in a gift for a specialist.

I have 3 jobs, I am running on 5 hours sleep, and I don't have a nanny, housekeeper, or even a babysitter, and one of these women - the kind that hasn't worked a day in 20 years but whines constantly about how hard it is being a stay-at-home mom, asks me what I'm bringing to the breakfast, and I say NOTHING. I am at work at 7am and don't have time, and she says - everyone is busy, you just have to make time!

What is wrong with these women? This is one more domestic expectation that seems to be forced only on women, regardless of whether or not we work as much as men. PTA is a tool of oppression and I want to punch it in the face.

You do not have to participate. Do you have anything blooming in your yard or balcony- there is your flower. Skip the food. It is good for your kid to make a card for his teacher. Skip the last two.

[Anonymous]

I have kids at 2 different ES, and what you describe is the way it works at both of them.
I find the flower one annoying but you could do some kind of not alive flower or pick something from your yard.
I would do the breakfast thing at the normal time my kid gets to school - I wouldn’t go early for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1) grab a flower from your garden
2) ignore this-- everyone brings in food. Or send in some grapes or cookies.
3) Have your kid make a card.
4) Get 2 amazon gift cards -- one for the teacher...
5) and one for the specialist.

Oh. my. god. Can you people not read? We had a specific list of things to bring - and nothing on the list was pre-prepared. It was all kinds of complicated dishes, like casseroles and things. There were no plates options.

The teachers in Fairfax make plenty of money. I can't afford to send in gift cards - I've already done so for Christmas, and will do so again at the end of the year. But this is ridiculous.

I do not have time for gardening!! What world do you live in?? My priorities are work, work, and putting food on the table for my kid. I don't have time even to help him with homework! Have him make a card? I can't even get him to brush his teeth and go to bed with 2 hours of nagging.

I'm guessing you don't work, or that if you do, you can afford things like landscapers, housekeepers, and babysitters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PTA mom here who also works. At our pta it’s mostly the working parents who put the most time in. I know each school varies. So please don’t make this a sahm/wohm issue.

You can just do the card and send a box of store bought muffins with your kid the day before and ask them to drop it in the office. Done.

Don’t do anything and don’t worry about it like most parents. 75% of our school doesn’t do a damn thing for pta and if each family contributed just one hour a week to the school, it would make it a hell of a lot easier on those 15 parents who literally do everything because no one else is volunteering.

If you’re that upset about it, go to PTA meetings, offer ideas, offer to run just one event or at least spend one hour a year at the book fair or whatever your school has. Maybe it’ll give you an appreciation of the parents who do so much on their own time.

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

[Anonymous]

OP,

DON'T DO ANYTHING FOR TEACHER APPRECIATION WEEK.

We don't need resentful people like you hating the PTA just because you can't get it through your thick head that you are under NO OBLIGATION, and that PARTICIPATION IS VOLUNTARY. Why are you taking to heart what a stupid and insensitive person told you? You smile, you say "hmm-mm", and you don't lift a finger.

You really need to grow up. Or maybe you're one of those people who love to feel put-upon?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree completely OP. I can’t imagine that question would have been asked of a dad. It’s more unnecessary expectations on women by women. I appreciate the women (usually it’s women) who step up to be on the pta but I wish they would be mindful of creating unnecessary sh*t to do. Unnecessary because I don’t think the teachers even care about this stuff.

Thank you for getting my point. There were two dads standing nearby at the time, and neither one of them is bringing anything either, but no asked them or shamed them for not doing so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

That's ridiculous, OP. Try to put those people out of your mind and just get on with your life. We're adults. Ain't nobody got time for this stuff (except for the people who do, which is great for them, as long as they don't expect other people to as well).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here - I have already run 2 events for them this year. I also donated a bunch of very valuable stuff from my workplace. This is one reason why it really bothers me that I was shamed for not participating in this stupid week-long show of how a lot of SAHMs just have way to much time. And how many times do I have to say it - we were given a list of very specific food items, and NONE OF THEM WERE PREPARED.

That's ridiculous, OP. Try to put those people out of your mind and just get on with your life. We're adults. Ain't nobody got time for this stuff (except for the people who do, which is great for them, as long as they don't expect other people to as well).

In the amount of time it took you to post here, you could have at least gotten one or two of the items on the list taken care of. It's all just priorities. You just choose to use your time to stew and fester instead of ignoring and moving on, or doing anything about it. You should think about that - it's not healthy. If you can't do it, just don't, and let it go. But don't let this woman push your buttons this much - your reaction to her (or any of this) is completely within your control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

In the amount of time it took you to post here, you could have at least gotten one or two of the items on the list taken care of. It's all just priorities. You just choose to use your time to stew and fester instead of ignoring and moving on, or doing anything about it. You should think about that - it's not healthy. If you can't do it, just don't, and let it go. But don't let this woman push your buttons this much - your reaction to her (or any of this) is completely within your control.

DP -- if you don't want to do it, that's fine too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is how teacher appreciation week works.

But why does it work that way? Because PTA parents design it that way. There's no reason it has to work that way.

--Teacher, also a parent, so I've seen it from both sides and think it's ridiculous

I wonder if the PTA would listen if the teachers told them to stop.

Op, either you or your spouse, if you have one, could pick up a Thank you card. Write a note in it and send it. Then be done.

Yes, you probably *could have* grabbed muffins at the store and sent them the day before but you didn't. Oh well. Nobody is going to feel less appreciated.

Go about your week. At one point I was the only single mom in ds's class. I did what I could and left everything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) grab a flower from your garden
2) ignore this-- everyone brings in food. Or send in some grapes or cookies.
3) Have your kid make a card.
4) Get 2 amazon gift cards -- one for the teacher...
5) and one for the specialist.

Oh. my. god. Can you people not read? We had a specific list of things to bring - and nothing on the list was pre-prepared. It was all kinds of complicated dishes, like casseroles and things. There were no plates options.

The teachers in Fairfax make plenty of money. I can't afford to send in gift cards - I've already done so for Christmas, and will do so again at the end of the year. But this is ridiculous.

I do not have time for gardening!! What world do you live in?? My priorities are work, work, and putting food on the table for my kid. I don't have time even to help him with homework! Have him make a card? I can't even get him to brush his teeth and go to bed with 2 hours of nagging.

I'm guessing you don't work, or that if you do, you can afford things like landscapers, housekeepers, and babysitters.

Former single mom here.

Ok we get it. Your life is hell-a busy. Partly because your kid doesn't listen, apparently. You have no time to even maybe send an email saying "hey... thanks..."

Don't participate. Nobody really cares that much. But snarling at people who do have some time is ridiculous. In the time you spent posting here you could have sent an email or written a quick note.

No... people don't ask Dad's to do this stuff. Maybe some Dad's need to just step up and do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is how teacher appreciation week works.

But why does it work that way? Because PTA parents design it that way. There's no reason it has to work that way.

--Teacher, also a parent, so I've seen it from both sides and think it's ridiculous

I wonder if the PTA would listen if the teachers told them to stop.

Op, either you or your spouse, if you have one, could pick up a Thank you card. Write a note in it and send it. Then be done.

Yes, you probably *could have* grabbed muffins at the store and sent them the day before but you didn't. Oh well. Nobody is going to feel less appreciated.

Go about your week. At one point I was the only single mom in ds's class. I did what I could and left everything else.

At my school, both teachers and administrators asked the pto to please not do the week long over the top thing. They asked for things to be more spread out. The pto didn't listen.