Should we redshirt for Kindergarten?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

The difference between a typical 13-year-old and a typical 14-year-old is greater than the difference between a typical 5-year-old and a typical 6-year-old? Not in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS's bday is 9/13 and we have a 9/30 cutoff. I got the same advice from pre-school/daycare teachers. One advised that he needed speech therapy because he wasn't speaking clearly enough at 3 (he wasn't stuttering at the time). One advised that he had ODD and that we may needed to try different tactics to reign in his behavior at home so he would be better at school. We eventually did the county early intervention eval for stuttering. He wasn't diagnosed with any other issues and we sent him to school on time. He's fine. Grades and behavior are on track with his peers.
Unless the teachers perform a complete assessment on your child's Kindergarten readiness that's recognized by your county, I would take their recommendation with a grain of salt. Schools only want them to be able recognize most letters/number, write their name, answer a few general questions, be able to follow simple directions, and sit for short periods of time. If the kid can read, then that's a bonus. Take the summer to gently work with him on expectations and academics and he will likely be fine.

Any school that suggests that a 3 year old has ODD should be ignored because they clearly don't understand child development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

It's very relevant how good your school is at differentiating. Some schools are really good at keeping all kids challenged. Our school has a reputation for being quite tough academically, so I'm not afraid that my son will have everything come to him easily. There's plenty for him to learn.

If your school has poor quality academics, or does zero differentiating, it might be more of an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

The difference between a typical 13-year-old and a typical 14-year-old is greater than the difference between a typical 5-year-old and a typical 6-year-old? Not in my experience.

Np here. It depends on how the child develops but if they are not on a healthy trajectory with appropriate interventions...there can be vast differences in academics and maturity--negative and positive--in high school. Abstract thinking may not kick in until later meaning he will be behind and not do well in Algebra....and we have data that shows the higher level of math you take, the less likely you are to drip out of collegr. But hey, this is not my kid so I don't have to deal with it. But I may have to deal with an immature college freshman in my office having a meltdown because they can't handle the demands of college. Then I get annoyed.

[Anonymous]

Np here. It depends on how the child develops but if they are not on a healthy trajectory with appropriate interventions...there can be vast differences in academics and maturity--negative and positive--in high school. Abstract thinking may not kick in until later meaning he will be behind and not do well in Algebra....and we have data that shows the higher level of math you take, the less likely you are to drip out of collegr. But hey, this is not my kid so I don't have to deal with it. But I may have to deal with an immature college freshman in my office having a meltdown because they can't handle the demands of college. Then I get annoyed.

DH went to college at 17. It worked out for him because it was a highly structured environment with far more support that most institutions. However, he still thinks he was too young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My twins were born August 6th and I never thought of redshirting them until we had a incident in our school where one twin was held back for gross motor skills. OP all the basics are being learned and refined right now. It sounds like the teachers are giving you good advice. If he is behind now and not going to a good quality preschool...like Montessori...you could be setting him up for a tough time. You don't want him to hate school or academics. Plus I have read there is some evidence that red shirting is actually better for boys.

You can always find evidence to support it or find evidence to move ahead depending on what you believe. Holding back was terrible for my child so we had to skip a grade to fix the issue. Why would you hold back for gross motor? Get private PT/OT.

Yeah, I am a PhD in education so I can understand the research. My child had an IT and it was an incompetent teacher...so I was fine getting him out of her class and then arranging him to be moved up with a different teacher. When you know the system, it is easier to work it.

[Anonymous]

Np here. It depends on how the child develops but if they are not on a healthy trajectory with appropriate interventions...there can be vast differences in academics and maturity--negative and positive--in high school. Abstract thinking may not kick in until later meaning he will be behind and not do well in Algebra....and we have data that shows the higher level of math you take, the less likely you are to drip out of collegr. But hey, this is not my kid so I don't have to deal with it. But I may have to deal with an immature college freshman in my office having a meltdown because they can't handle the demands of college. Then I get annoyed.

Also, I can relate to this. I tested well and did well in school. I took Algebra early--but Geometry was very difficult for me. Mid-year, it kicked in and I saw the light. Then, it was quite easy. I still think it was a maturity thing and not an intelligence issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Np here. It depends on how the child develops but if they are not on a healthy trajectory with appropriate interventions...there can be vast differences in academics and maturity--negative and positive--in high school. Abstract thinking may not kick in until later meaning he will be behind and not do well in Algebra....and we have data that shows the higher level of math you take, the less likely you are to drip out of collegr. But hey, this is not my kid so I don't have to deal with it. But I may have to deal with an immature college freshman in my office having a meltdown because they can't handle the demands of college. Then I get annoyed.

Also, I can relate to this. I tested well and did well in school. I took Algebra early--but Geometry was very difficult for me. Mid-year, it kicked in and I saw the light. Then, it was quite easy. I still think it was a maturity thing and not an intelligence issue.

You are totally right! It isn't an intelligence issue at all but just depends on development. There are ways to scaffold critical thinking but a lot of times it does feel like a light bulb.

[Anonymous]

On the opposite side of the coin, the teachers at our preschool thought we were a little crazy to consider redshirting our "so smart" kid. But we had concerns based on emotional maturity. I think we made the right call - definitely at age 10 still the immature side and has a better peer fit with the younger class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

The difference between a typical 13-year-old and a typical 14-year-old is greater than the difference between a typical 5-year-old and a typical 6-year-old? Not in my experience.

Big differences in both. Puberty and growth spurts come into play in middle school. A young kid is likely behind in both. That makes for a very tough time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

The difference between a typical 13-year-old and a typical 14-year-old is greater than the difference between a typical 5-year-old and a typical 6-year-old? Not in my experience.

Big differences in both. Puberty and growth spurts come into play in middle school. A young kid is likely behind in both. That makes for a very tough time.

There can certainly be a big difference between a kid at 13 and that same kid at 14. But when it comes to comparing any given 13-year-old to any given 14-year-old -- nope. Kids don't go through puberty according to rigid dates on the calendar. The 13-year-old might have started puberty at 10, the 14-year-old might have started puberty at 12, since both are perfectly normal and common.

[Anonymous]

Not to hijack, but what about an end of June birthday? Teachers are saying he can go, but since he is small physically it might be good to wait a year. Nothing socially or academic, simply physical size (and he is not the smallest kid in the class). The thing is he'll be small next year too as the family is small. The cut-off is September 30.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to hijack, but what about an end of June birthday? Teachers are saying he can go, but since he is small physically it might be good to wait a year. Nothing socially or academic simply physical size (and he is not the smallest kid in the class). The thing is he'll be small next year too as the family is small. The cut-off is September 30.

Send him---I am a former First grade and K teacher who thinks red-shirting is fine for a socially immature kid. But, to hold back on physical size? No.

FWIW, I have a DD who was the tallest in her class in K-1. By high school, she was below average in height.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to hijack, but what about an end of June birthday? Teachers are saying he can go, but since he is small physically it might be good to wait a year. Nothing socially or academic, simply physical size (and he is not the smallest kid in the class). The thing is he'll be small next year too as the family is small. The cut-off is September 30.

That's absurd. There's no height requirement for kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not to hijack, but what about an end of June birthday? Teachers are saying he can go, but since he is small physically it might be good to wait a year. Nothing socially or academic simply physical size (and he is not the smallest kid in the class). The thing is he'll be small next year too as the family is small. The cut-off is September 30.

Send him---I am a former First grade and K teacher who thinks red-shirting is fine for a socially immature kid. But, to hold back on physical size? No.

FWIW, I have a DD who was the tallest in her class in K-1. By high school, she was below average in height.

Thanks, I was caught off guard by the teacher's comment, so I appreciate the feedback.