Should we redshirt for Kindergarten?

[Anonymous]

My twins were born August 6th and I never thought of redshirting them until we had a incident in our school where one twin was held back for gross motor skills. OP all the basics are being learned and refined right now. It sounds like the teachers are giving you good advice. If he is behind now and not going to a good quality preschool...like Montessori...you could be setting him up for a tough time. You don't want him to hate school or academics. Plus I have read there is some evidence that red shirting is actually better for boys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My twins were born August 6th and I never thought of redshirting them until we had a incident in our school where one twin was held back for gross motor skills. OP all the basics are being learned and refined right now. It sounds like the teachers are giving you good advice. If he is behind now and not going to a good quality preschool...like Montessori...you could be setting him up for a tough time. You don't want him to hate school or academics. Plus I have read there is some evidence that red shirting is actually better for boys.

You can always find evidence to support it or find evidence to move ahead depending on what you believe. Holding back was terrible for my child so we had to skip a grade to fix the issue. Why would you hold back for gross motor? Get private PT/OT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can always elect to repeat kindergarten or first grade. Be willing to reasses during the year. My daughter - October birthday - was okay in kindergarten but in spending time helping in the classroom it was clear to us that she was almost always following the lead of the older girls. We and her teacher kept an eye out and decided to repeat K. After we made that decision we learned that four other families had decided to do the same thing with their daughters. Another friend decided to stay and repeat first grade.

Everyone with older kids knows kids who did fine or okay being younger, and kids who clearly suffered. It is very kid specific. I encourage everyone to keep reevaluating their decisions. Our very good friends considered moving their early starting son to private school and repeating sixth grade. Their kid has things together now but he is 23. Middle school and high school were real struggles as he was just less mature than his peers all the way through and that is never fun.

Could the girls have done as well if they had not been held back? Possibly, but sports became a big thing for all of them. So, it would likely have been a very different experience.





The extra year for the girls gave them more maturity and confidence.

It is not accurate that you can elect to repeat K or 1st. The only way to do that at our MCPS is if the teacher/school wants you to, which is very, very rare. Parents can't just say "I think DC would do better to repeat."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can always elect to repeat kindergarten or first grade. Be willing to reasses during the year. My daughter - October birthday - was okay in kindergarten but in spending time helping in the classroom it was clear to us that she was almost always following the lead of the older girls. We and her teacher kept an eye out and decided to repeat K. After we made that decision we learned that four other families had decided to do the same thing with their daughters. Another friend decided to stay and repeat first grade.

Everyone with older kids knows kids who did fine or okay being younger, and kids who clearly suffered. It is very kid specific. I encourage everyone to keep reevaluating their decisions. Our very good friends considered moving their early starting son to private school and repeating sixth grade. Their kid has things together now but he is 23. Middle school and high school were real struggles as he was just less mature than his peers all the way through and that is never fun.

Could the girls have done as well if they had not been held back? Possibly, but sports became a big thing for all of them. So, it would likely have been a very different experience.





The extra year for the girls gave them more maturity and confidence.

It is not accurate that you can elect to repeat K or 1st. The only way to do that at our MCPS is if the teacher/school wants you to, which is very, very rare. Parents can't just say "I think DC would do better to repeat."

Actually that's exactly what the parents can do. You have a conference with the teacher and then again with the teacher and VP or P and there is paperwork to be done, but parents can call this. I did it for my Sept birthday son so that he repeated 1st grade. He is now finishing 4th grade and it was the best choice for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can always elect to repeat kindergarten or first grade. Be willing to reasses during the year. My daughter - October birthday - was okay in kindergarten but in spending time helping in the classroom it was clear to us that she was almost always following the lead of the older girls. We and her teacher kept an eye out and decided to repeat K. After we made that decision we learned that four other families had decided to do the same thing with their daughters. Another friend decided to stay and repeat first grade.

Everyone with older kids knows kids who did fine or okay being younger, and kids who clearly suffered. It is very kid specific. I encourage everyone to keep reevaluating their decisions. Our very good friends considered moving their early starting son to private school and repeating sixth grade. Their kid has things together now but he is 23. Middle school and high school were real struggles as he was just less mature than his peers all the way through and that is never fun.

Could the girls have done as well if they had not been held back? Possibly, but sports became a big thing for all of them. So, it would likely have been a very different experience.





The extra year for the girls gave them more maturity and confidence.

It is not accurate that you can elect to repeat K or 1st. The only way to do that at our MCPS is if the teacher/school wants you to, which is very, very rare. Parents can't just say "I think DC would do better to repeat."

Actually that's exactly what the parents can do. You have a conference with the teacher and then again with the teacher and VP or P and there is paperwork to be done, but parents can call this. I did it for my Sept birthday son so that he repeated 1st grade. He is now finishing 4th grade and it was the best choice for him.

That is absolutely not allowed at our school. Families are told why need to go to private to repeat K and then can come back.

[Anonymous]

I would send him on time. He has a summer birthday. IMO The only instance in which redshirting should be considered is when you have a fall-born child in an area with a winter cut-off. But since the majority of states have a September 1st cutoff and the majority of kids don't have fall birthdays, there are really very few kids who should be considered for redshirting.

[Anonymous]

OP,

The teachers are not recommending this for fun.

As for the long term, please remember that the reverse is also true. Being the youngest also comes with disadvantages. And, FWIW, most kids are 18 when they are Seniors. He will only be a month older if you redshirt him.

I taught K and first. Occasionally, there are kids who would benefit from another year before starting. It is a maturity thing--not an intelligence thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can always elect to repeat kindergarten or first grade. Be willing to reasses during the year. My daughter - October birthday - was okay in kindergarten but in spending time helping in the classroom it was clear to us that she was almost always following the lead of the older girls. We and her teacher kept an eye out and decided to repeat K. After we made that decision we learned that four other families had decided to do the same thing with their daughters. Another friend decided to stay and repeat first grade.

Everyone with older kids knows kids who did fine or okay being younger, and kids who clearly suffered. It is very kid specific. I encourage everyone to keep reevaluating their decisions. Our very good friends considered moving their early starting son to private school and repeating sixth grade. Their kid has things together now but he is 23. Middle school and high school were real struggles as he was just less mature than his peers all the way through and that is never fun.

Could the girls have done as well if they had not been held back? Possibly, but sports became a big thing for all of them. So, it would likely have been a very different experience.





The extra year for the girls gave them more maturity and confidence.

It is not accurate that you can elect to repeat K or 1st. The only way to do that at our MCPS is if the teacher/school wants you to, which is very, very rare. Parents can't just say "I think DC would do better to repeat."

Actually that's exactly what the parents can do. You have a conference with the teacher and then again with the teacher and VP or P and there is paperwork to be done, but parents can call this. I did it for my Sept birthday son so that he repeated 1st grade. He is now finishing 4th grade and it was the best choice for him.

That is absolutely not allowed at our school. Families are told why need to go to private to repeat K and then can come back.

It is not a "school" decision. And of course it is allowed. And no - school districts do not recommend losing kids to private school (very bad for business).

A decision to hold a kid back is not made in a vacuum. Teachers, admins and parents are all involved. If it is arguably best for the kid then it is no problem to hold a kid back.

Remember, this is about maturity; not intelligence. And the maturity factor is there throughout their school years. Young in 1st grade means young in 7th grade and in 11th grade and in college. Nothing like being young and small when all your friends have already hit their growth spurts and all the girls are 6 inches taller than you. Makes middle school a blast. Always good to be the worst kid at everything in sports only because you are small. Or, struggling in classes because your attention span isn't at the same level of your classmates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can always elect to repeat kindergarten or first grade. Be willing to reasses during the year. My daughter - October birthday - was okay in kindergarten but in spending time helping in the classroom it was clear to us that she was almost always following the lead of the older girls. We and her teacher kept an eye out and decided to repeat K. After we made that decision we learned that four other families had decided to do the same thing with their daughters. Another friend decided to stay and repeat first grade.

Everyone with older kids knows kids who did fine or okay being younger, and kids who clearly suffered. It is very kid specific. I encourage everyone to keep reevaluating their decisions. Our very good friends considered moving their early starting son to private school and repeating sixth grade. Their kid has things together now but he is 23. Middle school and high school were real struggles as he was just less mature than his peers all the way through and that is never fun.

Could the girls have done as well if they had not been held back? Possibly, but sports became a big thing for all of them. So, it would likely have been a very different experience.





The extra year for the girls gave them more maturity and confidence.

It is not accurate that you can elect to repeat K or 1st. The only way to do that at our MCPS is if the teacher/school wants you to, which is very, very rare. Parents can't just say "I think DC would do better to repeat."

Actually that's exactly what the parents can do. You have a conference with the teacher and then again with the teacher and VP or P and there is paperwork to be done, but parents can call this. I did it for my Sept birthday son so that he repeated 1st grade. He is now finishing 4th grade and it was the best choice for him.

That is absolutely not allowed at our school. Families are told why need to go to private to repeat K and then can come back.

It is not a "school" decision. And of course it is allowed. And no - school districts do not recommend losing kids to private school (very bad for business).

A decision to hold a kid back is not made in a vacuum. Teachers, admins and parents are all involved. If it is arguably best for the kid then it is no problem to hold a kid back.

Remember, this is about maturity; not intelligence. And the maturity factor is there throughout their school years. Young in 1st grade means young in 7th grade and in 11th grade and in college. Nothing like being young and small when all your friends have already hit their growth spurts and all the girls are 6 inches taller than you. Makes middle school a blast. Always good to be the worst kid at everything in sports only because you are small. Or, struggling in classes because your attention span isn't at the same level of your classmates.

That's great if your school allowanhat, but our MCPS does not. I know several families who have had to move their kids to private to repeat because they were academically on-target but socially immature. Parents pushed the school to allow the child to repeat and were told no. In this environment, I can't blame anyone who is on the fence about whether the child is ready who chooses to redshirt.

[Anonymous]

At my school it is encouraged to let them try out the K year and then repeat if it seems the child is not ready to go for 1st.

[Anonymous]

DS's bday is 9/13 and we have a 9/30 cutoff. I got the same advice from pre-school/daycare teachers. One advised that he needed speech therapy because he wasn't speaking clearly enough at 3 (he wasn't stuttering at the time). One advised that he had ODD and that we may needed to try different tactics to reign in his behavior at home so he would be better at school. We eventually did the county early intervention eval for stuttering. He wasn't diagnosed with any other issues and we sent him to school on time. He's fine. Grades and behavior are on track with his peers.
Unless the teachers perform a complete assessment on your child's Kindergarten readiness that's recognized by your county, I would take their recommendation with a grain of salt. Schools only want them to be able recognize most letters/number, write their name, answer a few general questions, be able to follow simple directions, and sit for short periods of time. If the kid can read, then that's a bonus. Take the summer to gently work with him on expectations and academics and he will likely be fine.

[Anonymous]

Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. And, middle school is even more difficult. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send him. Like a PP said, any disadvantage he experiences now will vanish. A 6-year-old may have a huge emotional advantage over a 5-year-old, but fast forward. In high school, the emotional difference between a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old is virtually non-existent, but who do you think will do better? The 18-year-old who had everything come easy to them, or the 17-year-old who actually had to work to achieve their goals?

I think it is worse in high school. The disadvantages now can be more exaggerated as he gets older.

How so? Are you talking about academics, or things like driving, dating, turning 18?