Would you send a letter to your Middle School bully?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:True story: my middle/high school bully's older brother wrote a book about bullying, and in interviews spoke about how much he hated bullying.

I don't see how he couldn't have known what a vicious, evil bully his little brother was.

To be honest, he probably bullied his little brother something awful and the brother paid if forward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a middle school bully. We both went to the same high school where the bullying stopped. I retaliated at a high school reunion, observing to him that I was in DC doing well, and he was in Dumass, Illinois doing menial labor. I'm looking forward to the next reunion.

You are incredibly petty, and the loser now. Congrats!

I think he is entitled to gloat. Love to witness Karmactic justice.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, but it is pitiful to "get back" at your *middle school* bully, decades later. You are talking about someone who was 11-13 at the time that they bullied you. If you are still seriously preoccupied with this, 30 years later, get therapy.

I'm not denying that bulling has an impact, but this is stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but it is pitiful to "get back" at your *middle school* bully, decades later. You are talking about someone who was 11-13 at the time that they bullied you. If you are still seriously preoccupied with this, 30 years later, get therapy.

I'm not denying that bulling has an impact, but this is stupid.

At this point it's not the former bully that has the problem...

I bet he'd laugh, I would and probably doesn't matter because he has a life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:True story: my middle/high school bully's older brother wrote a book about bullying, and in interviews spoke about how much he hated bullying.

I don't see how he couldn't have known what a vicious, evil bully his little brother was.

Maybe he did know and that's why he wrote the book. Siblings don't always get along and maybe the younger one was bullying the older one.

I doubt it. They were four years apart, and the older one was well-liked and handsome, and very intelligent (not a surprise he became a writer). The younger one was a short, skinny rat-faced loser who wasn't very bright, and kind of floated on the periphery of his brother's friend group just because they were related. I don't think anybody in my high school knew I was in the throes of bulimia, but somehow the evil bully picked up on something, and used to make horrible taunts to me about my body (and I wasn't overweight at all). Actually, I blame him for CAUSING my bulimia. I will never, ever forget the things he said to me when we were at the same lab table freshman year, and I have no idea why he focused on me, but it was horribly embarrassing and painful to me. I wish him nothing but pain and misery in his life.

When I read the interviews his big brother gave about how his novel was inspired by bullying and hazing at our high school, I really struggled with myself to resist posting comments on his amazon reviews about how his own brother was the worst bully of all.

You should have. It's fair game. I don't find this petty at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In middle school I was severely bullied. Physically and emotionally. Would you now, some 30 years later send a letter to your erstwhile bully telling them of your successes and saying what a loser they were and are, or would you just let it be?

It's pretty pathetic, that despite your success, your middle school bullies still play a part in your psyche. Just be grateful for your life and move on. Good god!

[Anonymous]

I think there are two separate questions here:

1. Can bullying by children have lasting effects that linger into adulthood? Yes.

2. Is it reasonable to confront someone who bullied you 30 years ago, when they were a child themselves? No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:True story: my middle/high school bully's older brother wrote a book about bullying, and in interviews spoke about how much he hated bullying.

I don't see how he couldn't have known what a vicious, evil bully his little brother was.

Maybe he did know and that's why he wrote the book. Siblings don't always get along and maybe the younger one was bullying the older one.

I doubt it. They were four years apart, and the older one was well-liked and handsome, and very intelligent (not a surprise he became a writer). The younger one was a short, skinny rat-faced loser who wasn't very bright, and kind of floated on the periphery of his brother's friend group just because they were related. I don't think anybody in my high school knew I was in the throes of bulimia, but somehow the evil bully picked up on something, and used to make horrible taunts to me about my body (and I wasn't overweight at all). Actually, I blame him for CAUSING my bulimia. I will never, ever forget the things he said to me when we were at the same lab table freshman year, and I have no idea why he focused on me, but it was horribly embarrassing and painful to me. I wish him nothing but pain and misery in his life.

When I read the interviews his big brother gave about how his novel was inspired by bullying and hazing at our high school, I really struggled with myself to resist posting comments on his amazon reviews about how his own brother was the worst bully of all.

You should have. It's fair game. I don't find this petty at all.

I'm sorry this happened to you, but it's really not normal or healthy to "wish nothing but pain and misery in his life" for a childhood bully from decades ago. I'm not trying to diminish your suffering. I'm just saying that this isn't healthy and you really seem like you need therapy.