MIL Calls Baby 'lil Piggy' when he's being fed. I'm I being too sensitive?

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on the general demeanor of your MIL. Is she generally a nice non-demeaning person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is your child. Tell her you want her to stop saying this.

This is about boundaries. She is overstepping her boundaries here. You'll need to set much more difficult boundaries later on. Start now.

Ugh.. you sound like a real pleasure. Talk about a control FREAK.
I'm sure if asked to describe your absolute antithesis in 3 adjectives your husband would reply "easy going, drama free & not ridiculously intense whatsoever"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Aren't you just too, too wonderful to be of this world! Barf. You make me vomit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Grandchildren call their granparents all sorts of weird slightly demeaning granparent names "pop-pop" etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm on your side. If say I liked that nickname, I'd be fine with it, but I don't like it, in this case. It'd be more tolerable if it was a name I was fine with.

But the relationship between a child and his grandparent is not your own. As you said you don't like the name but its not your name to like. Its a term of endearment between her and her grandchild. She isn't abusing him.

The only reason a person would live and die on this hill is if they didn't like their MIL and wanted to exert control over the MILs relationship with the child. Which says way more about the mother than the grandmother.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Um ... who said the "weaker person" is not allowed to use a term of endearment? Your post makes no sense to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Grandchildren call their granparents all sorts of weird slightly demeaning granparent names "pop-pop" etc.

One set of mine were Honey and PawPaw

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm on your side. If say I liked that nickname, I'd be fine with it, but I don't like it, in this case. It'd be more tolerable if it was a name I was fine with.

But the relationship between a child and his grandparent is not your own. As you said you don't like the name but its not your name to like. Its a term of endearment between her and her grandchild. She isn't abusing him.

The only reason a person would live and die on this hill is if they didn't like their MIL and wanted to exert control over the MILs relationship with the child. Which says way more about the mother than the grandmother.

This is the world's most stupid argument - the relationship is between the grandparent and the child, so OP cannot say anything?

Yes, that is the world's most stupid argument.

I feel bad for you.

You are right. I exaggerated. Allow me to correct myself.

Your point is stupid. Just because it is a grandparent relationship, this does not mean the wishes and instincts of the parent are irrelevant, and it doesn't mean the OP is trying to "exert control" over the relationship. She doesn't like her daughter being called a pig when she is eating.

Ooh touched a nerve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Um ... who said the "weaker person" is not allowed to use a term of endearment? Your post makes no sense to me.

Do you really think grandma would allow her grandchild to call her miss piggy while she's eating?

That's what's wrong with the dynamic. It's not a nice nickname. It's not sweet or kind. It's mildly making fun of the kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This little piggy saying has been going on for generations. Most of our parents used it, you just don't remember. You sound like a pain in the ass daughter in law.

When you wonder why your kids don't want you anywhere near your grandchildren, know that your attitude is the reason why.

[Anonymous]

My newborn grunts and snorts when she nurses and sounds like a pig...but I wouldn't call her piggy when she's older. Also, even if it's over sesnsitive what's at stake asking her to stop? I adore my MIL and in this case would say something like "hey, I know I'm being sensitive but somehow "piggy"'rubs me the wrong way. Would you mind not calling Larlo that?" She might be surprised but I can't see how that's offensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I call my son stink man. Doesn't mean he really stinks!

Janet Lansbury (of RIE fame) says not to call kids names like this, even in an endearing way. It makes them feel self-conscious for no reason. Normally, I'm not nutty about stuff like this, but here's an anecdote - my DH has an 11 year old son. Since the age of about 4, my DH would call him stinky feet and pretend his feet stunk. He didn't mean any harm, but his son actually has an enormous complex about it now.

Don't all parents play this game with their kids? I've done it with all four of mine.

My kids nicknames are: Monkey Mash, Spider Stew, Booger Bear & Pigeon Pie. Hell my dad still calls me Princess Monster Face sometimes and I'm 44.

I understand what you are saying but how come kids are not allowed to call their parents/grandparents lovingly piggy. I mean why is it the person with more authority is allowed to say sth in a loving manner and the weaker person is not allowed to say any such thing? Makes no sense to me and that's why I only use sweet nick names that I would not mind to be called either.

Um ... who said the "weaker person" is not allowed to use a term of endearment? Your post makes no sense to me.

Do you really think grandma would allow her grandchild to call her miss piggy while she's eating?

That's what's wrong with the dynamic. It's not a nice nickname. It's not sweet or kind. It's mildly making fun of the kid.

I don't know if she would or not, I don't know her. My cousin has the nickname Piglet that family and close friends still use as an adult. She has never been fat and never needed therapy because her grandpa called her and her sister Piglet and Pooh.

This is a baby being fed by his grandmother. Not a preteen being forced to wear a dress and being threatened with wire hangers.


"Mildly making fun" tells me all I need to know though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This little piggy saying has been going on for generations. Most of our parents used it, you just don't remember. You sound like a pain in the ass daughter in law.

When you wonder why your kids don't want you anywhere near your grandchildren, know that your attitude is the reason why.

She'll probably understand that its just her PITA daughter in law making a power move. "I'm queen bee, he's mine now." - NP

[Anonymous]

Have you seen a Christmas Story OP?