Do parents rationalize letting their kids act mediocre because it's so easy to raise average kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're in a competitive school system. When my child became suicidal in 5th grade, I decided to back off a bit. I still insist that certain standards are met - homework done and turned in for example - but our lives are not going to center on her grades.

If she turns out to be mediocre but 1) alive and hopefully 2) happy, I am fine with that. I'd rather have a happy retail worker for a child than a neurotic mess because I spent her childhood haranguing her about her grades.

As an aside I was a mediocre kid and am now high income. Got serious towards the end of college. Some people just have to grow up before they take an interest in school.

+1000
Agree completely. Plenty of "average" kids kick into high gear while in college, or even later. I'd rather have average, happy kids than over-achievers who are miserable and burned out.

It's pretty rare for kids to become late bloomers, it's just something parents of mediocre kids cling to for hope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're in a competitive school system. When my child became suicidal in 5th grade, I decided to back off a bit. I still insist that certain standards are met - homework done and turned in for example - but our lives are not going to center on her grades.

If she turns out to be mediocre but 1) alive and hopefully 2) happy, I am fine with that. I'd rather have a happy retail worker for a child than a neurotic mess because I spent her childhood haranguing her about her grades.

As an aside I was a mediocre kid and am now high income. Got serious towards the end of college. Some people just have to grow up before they take an interest in school.

+1000
Agree completely. Plenty of "average" kids kick into high gear while in college, or even later. I'd rather have average, happy kids than over-achievers who are miserable and burned out.

It's pretty rare for kids to become late bloomers, it's just something parents of mediocre kids cling to for hope.

I'm guessing you are not well-liked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're in a competitive school system. When my child became suicidal in 5th grade, I decided to back off a bit. I still insist that certain standards are met - homework done and turned in for example - but our lives are not going to center on her grades.

If she turns out to be mediocre but 1) alive and hopefully 2) happy, I am fine with that. I'd rather have a happy retail worker for a child than a neurotic mess because I spent her childhood haranguing her about her grades.

As an aside I was a mediocre kid and am now high income. Got serious towards the end of college. Some people just have to grow up before they take an interest in school.

+1000
Agree completely. Plenty of "average" kids kick into high gear while in college, or even later. I'd rather have average, happy kids than over-achievers who are miserable and burned out.

It's pretty rare for kids to become late bloomers, it's just something parents of mediocre kids cling to for hope.

I will say the true late bloomer is more common than you realize. More typically, these are people awaiting a challenge, often with mild learning disabilities. As the grow up, they learn to compensate for the disabilities and can perform at a high level, sometimes extremely high level.

[Anonymous]

Because sometimes you have to realize that the mental/emotional damage you do by placing an unreasonable amount of pressure on a person is far worse than a C.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're in a competitive school system. When my child became suicidal in 5th grade, I decided to back off a bit. I still insist that certain standards are met - homework done and turned in for example - but our lives are not going to center on her grades.

If she turns out to be mediocre but 1) alive and hopefully 2) happy, I am fine with that. I'd rather have a happy retail worker for a child than a neurotic mess because I spent her childhood haranguing her about her grades.

As an aside I was a mediocre kid and am now high income. Got serious towards the end of college. Some people just have to grow up before they take an interest in school.

+1000
Agree completely. Plenty of "average" kids kick into high gear while in college, or even later. I'd rather have average, happy kids than over-achievers who are miserable and burned out.

It's pretty rare for kids to become late bloomers, it's just something parents of mediocre kids cling to for hope.

I will say the true late bloomer is more common than you realize. More typically, these are people awaiting a challenge, often with mild learning disabilities. As the grow up, they learn to compensate for the disabilities and can perform at a high level, sometimes extremely high level.

I agree with this. I was an A student all of my life. But many of us are people pleasers and good test takers who have trouble thinking outside of the box because we're good at paying attention to others. I wish I had cultivated independence and creativity earlier. It's harder as we get older to break these habits.

[Anonymous]

I'll tell you what is not easy--raising kids who become ill in their teen years. Their grades may look mediocre to the OP, but she is apparently clueless as to the degree of warrior momism it can take to get them to just a functioning level.