Ladies - why do you sleep with married men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op I think you don't believe you deserve better than being a side piece. Deep down you think you are worthless and all you can offer is sex in hopes of getting loved, AND you only offer it to men who cannot give love back to you because you don't believe you are worthy of the love of a good man. Could be daddy issues or sex abuse history or just someone convincing you as a child that you weren't worthy of unconditional love. Have you tried therapy to figure out why you don't feel deserving of honest love?

What an idiotic, full of cliches and uneducated guesses explanation of affairs!

[Anonymous]

Anonymou[b wrote:s]Because my husband has no libido and married people are safe bets for each other bc we both have leverage over the other[/b]

I wish I could meet another married woman like this who, like me, has unfulfilled needs at home!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't (at least knowingly), but I have two friends that have and this is what they explain.

Friend 1 was in an off/on relationship with her child's father. During one of their offs, he quickly began dating and married someone else. As in the whole thing took less than 90 days. About a month after the wedding, he came by and told my friend that he'd made a terrible mistake, she was his soulmate, but the new wife was pregnant and would take the baby back to her native country if he divorced her. In the past 7 years, he and my friend have been somewhat secretly on and off. My friend says he's her soulmate and they are waiting until her AP & the wife's son turns 18. I think she's stupid, but this relationship has spanned far more years than my first marriage. Maybe it'll work out.

Friend 2 just wanted babies and no real man in the picture. She said she didn't want an anonymous sperm donor. Both her kids' dads are affluent married men happy to write a hush money check in lieu of her filing for CS. It's not enough for her to live a high end lifestyle, but it is more generous than any voluntary CS I've ever heard of a man paying. It is far cheaper than a divorce would be. Perhaps even cheaper than some diamonds to soothe an irate wife like Kobe Bryant had to buy. Anyway, Friend 2 exclusively dates married men. She doesn't meet them online. They aren't sugar daddies. They don't play stepdad to her kids. She meets most through her work (which isn't sex work or anything sleezy or trashy at all). It is, however, a very easy way to meet rich men and get their personal contact info right under the wives' noses. In fact, the last two men she dated were through women introducing her to their DH. My friend says she'll meet and marry someone when her younger child goes off to college.

Why should they pay anything? In my book, to her, they are nothing much more than an anonymous sperm donor! Sperm donors don't by CS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did the affairs start?

We text about a work matter. He makes me his go-to girl for work matters. He invites me to meet him out after work. Complains about home life, swears divorce is on the imminent horizon, we get drunk and make out.

Yet, you married someone else to begin with which means you saw something in that person.

[Anonymous]

I hate the psychobabble in this thread. People get attracted to each other, some happen to be married, some not. The end. All this "afraid of commitment" is bullshit, pure and simple. If you think that being with 100% with another person is "scary," it's your problem. Don't project it on the rest of the population, because the overwhelming majority of women are not scared of commitment in the least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymou[b wrote:s]Because my husband has no libido and married people are safe bets for each other bc we both have leverage over the other[/b]

I wish I could meet another married woman like this who, like me, has unfulfilled needs at home!

Me too, I've thought about registering for an account just to be able to have follow up conversations with the people who are like "me too!". It's good to know you're not alone but would be helpful to be able to chat about how to deal

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did the affairs start?

You start as friends and that tiny spark of something becomes more as you ignore your spouse and focus on this new shiny thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymou[b wrote:s]Because my husband has no libido and married people are safe bets for each other bc we both have leverage over the other[/b]

I wish I could meet another married woman like this who, like me, has unfulfilled needs at home!

Me too, I've thought about registering for an account just to be able to have follow up conversations with the people who are like "me too!". It's good to know you're not alone but would be helpful to be able to chat about how to deal

Years ago that is what the explicit forum was like. We were all in sexless marriages and it was like oh my gosh, I'm not the only one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did the affairs start?

We text about a work matter. He makes me his go-to girl for work matters. He invites me to meet him out after work. Complains about home life, swears divorce is on the imminent horizon, we get drunk and make out.

Yet, you married someone else to begin with which means you saw something in that person.

I'm not married, dope. What does this even mean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did the affairs start?

We text about a work matter. He makes me his go-to girl for work matters. He invites me to meet him out after work. Complains about home life, swears divorce is on the imminent horizon, we get drunk and make out.

Yet, you married someone else to begin with which means you saw something in that person.

I'm not married, dope. What does this even mean?

It means you are expected to follow the rules established by the society for better or worse. Once you're hitched, you're expected to "work on it" no matter how miserable this makes your life and the lives of people around you.

Bottom line: Enjoy your freedom while you have it