S/o SAHDs - why do so many women not want one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought equality means equal opportunity for all types of lifestyles?

Because SAHMs actually work - they take care of the kids, clean, cook, run errands. SAHDs can barely take care of the kids.

A husband comes home to a cooked dinner, clean house, thriving kids. A woman comes home to a destroyed house, piles of dirty dishes, no dinner while kids didn't do their homework and had chips for lunch. That's basically the difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought equality means equal opportunity for all types of lifestyles?

Because SAHMs actually work - they take care of the kids, clean, cook, run errands. SAHDs can barely take care of the kids.

A husband comes home to a cooked dinner, clean house, thriving kids. A woman comes home to a destroyed house, piles of dirty dishes, no dinner while kids didn't do their homework and had chips for lunch. That's basically the difference.

What a sexist comment. Sounds like you just married an incompetent man. Did your DH never learned how to do his own laundry, cook for himself, or clean his house? Most adult men can do these things just fine. And most dads I know are fully capable of taking care of their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought equality means equal opportunity for all types of lifestyles?

Because SAHMs actually work - they take care of the kids, clean, cook, run errands. SAHDs can barely take care of the kids.

A husband comes home to a cooked dinner, clean house, thriving kids. A woman comes home to a destroyed house, piles of dirty dishes, no dinner while kids didn't do their homework and had chips for lunch. That's basically the difference.

What a sexist comment. Sounds like you just married an incompetent man. Did your DH never learned how to do his own laundry, cook for himself, or clean his house? Most adult men can do these things just fine. And most dads I know are fully capable of taking care of their children.

It's clear to me that PP's DH was raised by a SAHM and a slippers and martini at the door dad, and that is the model he would follow even if his wife was the breadwinner

[Anonymous]

If I earned enough I'd want one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought equality means equal opportunity for all types of lifestyles?

Because SAHMs actually work - they take care of the kids, clean, cook, run errands. SAHDs can barely take care of the kids.

A husband comes home to a cooked dinner, clean house, thriving kids. A woman comes home to a destroyed house, piles of dirty dishes, no dinner while kids didn't do their homework and had chips for lunch. That's basically the difference.

Sorry you married a dud.

[Anonymous]

I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

My DH. But he has a wonderful career and I make 75% what he does so I'm out of luck.

[Anonymous]

I'd love it. Not sure if DH would want to stay home fulll-time, but I think he'd be good at it. He makes 3x my salary though, so not really an option for us without a drastic decrease in standard of living. I know DH wouldn't want that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

My husband does this, and we both work full time. And I make more, so he could stay home, but he loves his work. I often feel guilty reading about all the moms doing the second shift at home, because that is not at all my experience. And my husband is plenty masculine and quite the catch. Feel very lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

For me, it's not that the man (husband) can't do those things--it's that he'll only do then when the woman notices and asks him to do them.... whereas the woman just notices something that needs to be done and does it. If I asked my husband to keep an eye on the little one's laundry and do it when it gets full, he will. But a part of me resents the fact that I need to ask him to do that. No one asks ME to do it; I just notice, and do it. My DH will take on any task I ask him to do: make dinner, take the kids to a doctor's appointment, take the cat to the vet. But that's the key. I still have the task on my mind, because I have to ask him to do it.

Does that make any sense? Am I explaining it right? Please don't think I'm being petty. I do love my DH! And he is a great dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

I am your one man. I do it. I do it ALL. and I work 50-55 hours a week. Wife cooks maybe 3x a week if I'm lucky, and even then she doesn't clean up after herself. I do ALL of the cleaning, literally all of it (dishes, mopping, dusting, laundry, et al) and most of the time when I am cleaning she's laying on the couch playing Candy Crush and watching Grey's Anatomy type shows. And she is still "too tired" for sex other than once since September.

I help Jr with the homework. I take him to all his practices and games. I am the one taking him to the doctor.

Stop it with your sexist, condescending and hateful rhetoric about men and fathers. Momager. What a joke. You're a terrible person for even insinuating what you wrote.

You make me sick to think there are hateful and despicable women like you in this world procreating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

Challenge accepted: my DH does all of those things and more without being asked. He knows what has to be done and does it well. My contributions during the week are limited to cleaning up after dinner, which DH cooks 90% of the time, and the bedtime routine. DH does all of that AND tackles the bigger, infrequent household tasks, like fixing the deck, painting, car maintenance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

I am your one man. I do it. I do it ALL. and I work 50-55 hours a week. Wife cooks maybe 3x a week if I'm lucky, and even then she doesn't clean up after herself. I do ALL of the cleaning, literally all of it (dishes, mopping, dusting, laundry, et al) and most of the time when I am cleaning she's laying on the couch playing Candy Crush and watching Grey's Anatomy type shows. And she is still "too tired" for sex other than once since September.

I help Jr with the homework. I take him to all his practices and games. I am the one taking him to the doctor.

Stop it with your sexist, condescending and hateful rhetoric about men and fathers. Momager. What a joke. You're a terrible person for even insinuating what you wrote.

You make me sick to think there are hateful and despicable women like you in this world procreating.

Lol...if a man makes dinner 3x a week, he is amazing for contributing so much. If a woman makes dinner 3x a week, she is basically derelict in her duties as mom and wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

I am your one man. I do it. I do it ALL. and I work 50-55 hours a week. Wife cooks maybe 3x a week if I'm lucky, and even then she doesn't clean up after herself. I do ALL of the cleaning, literally all of it (dishes, mopping, dusting, laundry, et al) and most of the time when I am cleaning she's laying on the couch playing Candy Crush and watching Grey's Anatomy type shows. And she is still "too tired" for sex other than once since September.

I help Jr with the homework. I take him to all his practices and games. I am the one taking him to the doctor.

Stop it with your sexist, condescending and hateful rhetoric about men and fathers. Momager. What a joke. You're a terrible person for even insinuating what you wrote.

You make me sick to think there are hateful and despicable women like you in this world procreating.

I think it's awesome that you contribute so much to your family. A lot of men do and their efforts are overlooked or dismissed. I think a lot of these posters know one-dimensional men and conclude that all men must be similarly unable to do such things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've not met any men who are good at it and it seems that the mom who works for pay still has to do all of the homework.

I think women are stuck having to be the "momagers" of the family. A husband can execute a task, but not take care of the "macro" of family life...finding a doctor, getting a birthday present, making dinner, cleaning the house, etc. all while the woman is at work. I dare anyone to tell me of one man who can do all of those things.

I am your one man. I do it. I do it ALL. and I work 50-55 hours a week. Wife cooks maybe 3x a week if I'm lucky, and even then she doesn't clean up after herself. I do ALL of the cleaning, literally all of it (dishes, mopping, dusting, laundry, et al) and most of the time when I am cleaning she's laying on the couch playing Candy Crush and watching Grey's Anatomy type shows. And she is still "too tired" for sex other than once since September.

I help Jr with the homework. I take him to all his practices and games. I am the one taking him to the doctor.

Stop it with your sexist, condescending and hateful rhetoric about men and fathers. Momager. What a joke. You're a terrible person for even insinuating what you wrote.

You make me sick to think there are hateful and despicable women like you in this world procreating.

Lol...if a man makes dinner 3x a week, he is amazing for contributing so much. If a woman makes dinner 3x a week, she is basically derelict in her duties as mom and wife.

Wow. Your response just proves PP's notion that you're an awful human being. I would say GFY but you probably get plenty of practice at that since no one else touch you. You make me sad to be a woman.

PP, you're a good man for doing so much for your family