S/o SAHDs - why do so many women not want one?

[Anonymous]

I thought equality means equal opportunity for all types of lifestyles?

[Anonymous]

If we were lucky enough to afford one of us to stay home, I'd want it to be me. I think DH would agree. That said, I know lots of couples with SAHDs and they are very happy. I also know many couples where the dad is the default parent, though he also works. They are also happy. Every family is different.

[Anonymous]

1) We don't have children lol

But if we did, then 2) Because I don't make enough money for him to be one

[Anonymous]

If we could afford to live on one salary, hell, I'd be perfectly fine if my DH wanted to stay home. Except I work from home... Never mind, he'd be in my way.

[Anonymous]

My husband would like to, but he was making $400k and I was making $50K, so I stayed home, but if the salaries were reversed, the roles would be reversed.

[Anonymous]

While I have known a great SAHD, I dated two guys who wanted to be SAHDs. They weren't doing it because they loved children or thought family was important. They were just lazy and thought it was an easy job.

Also, something that plays a big role- no maternity leave. If the main breadwinner is female and unpaid for 3 months while she's out on maternity, who will be bringing home a paycheck?

[Anonymous]

Eh, it would be nice, but hedging our risk with two jobs isn't worth the advantages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While I have known a great SAHD, I dated two guys who wanted to be SAHDs. They weren't doing it because they loved children or thought family was important. They were just lazy and thought it was an easy job.

Also, something that plays a big role- no maternity leave. If the main breadwinner is female and unpaid for 3 months while she's out on maternity, who will be bringing home a paycheck?

You could just like not take that much leave. Why would you need to with a SAHD?

[Anonymous]

I think if I had a job and liked and a salary high enough for us to be a single-income household, I'd be happy to have my husband be a SAHD.

[Anonymous]

I totally would but we don't make enough and likely never will. My boss' husband is a SAHD and they both love that he can take care of the kids and the house and whatnot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think if I had a job I liked and a salary high enough for us to be a single-income household, I'd be happy to have my husband be a SAHD.

corrected

[Anonymous]

My husband would love to be a SAHD. I only believe in equality in our home when it meets my needs. He outlearns me so in all reality it would make no sense to do role reversal as we couldn't live off of any income I'd earn.

[Anonymous]

I don't know. My husband is a SAHD. That wasn't his goal in life but when we had kids it made sense.

[Anonymous]

I think in many ways we are biologically primed to follow traditional gender roles. A man is supposed to be the provider, a woman the nurturer. So, while a lot has changed in terms of education and employment - women still assume the bigger role in child raising and house keeping, and men still want to earn more than their wives.

I would like to see SAHDs become more common and their contribution more respected.

[Anonymous]

He would suck at it