Married but fantasizing about another man - advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP so if they have an STD you would tolerate it's all good?

P PP are you the one who posts about the Italian colleague who placed your hand on his mutated member? Can you tell that story again?

Yes, I was the PP who had posted about the Italian Colleague. Here's a cut and paste of my original post:

My near miss was was at a work event. Every year my company has a kickoff meeting and coworkers show up from various global offices. As it turns out, one of my Italian counterparts is extremely hot. He's about 6'2" and is in great shape. Anyway, we had a work event and then grabbed some drinks in a loud bar. We were several drinks in, the flirting was getting heavy and he was having to talk into my ear because the bar was so loud. His accent was really sexy. He kept saying that I was making him hot. I said I didn't believe him and he puts my hand on his HUGE erection. Then he whispered in my ear that he wanted to take me to his room and "F me until I scream".


Like I said, it's a slippery slope that gets worse when drinks are involved.

[Anonymous]

Did not read the thread. Basing my response on the thread title.

How about not fantasizing about the OM? And if you cannot stop, how about imagining him doing something gross?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did not read the thread. Basing my response on the thread title.

How about not fantasizing about the OM? And if you cannot stop, how about imagining him doing something gross?

Try to imagine the fall out for your marriage and family. That's probably the biggest curb to your lust for this guy. Its a crush. It will pass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP so if they have an STD you would tolerate it's all good?

P PP are you the one who posts about the Italian colleague who placed your hand on his mutated member? Can you tell that story again?

Yes, I was the PP who had posted about the Italian Colleague. Here's a cut and paste of my original post:

My near miss was was at a work event. Every year my company has a kickoff meeting and coworkers show up from various global offices. As it turns out, one of my Italian counterparts is extremely hot. He's about 6'2" and is in great shape. Anyway, we had a work event and then grabbed some drinks in a loud bar. We were several drinks in, the flirting was getting heavy and he was having to talk into my ear because the bar was so loud. His accent was really sexy. He kept saying that I was making him hot. I said I didn't believe him and he puts my hand on his HUGE erection. Then he whispered in my ear that he wanted to take me to his room and "F me until I scream".


Like I said, it's a slippery slope that gets worse when drinks are involved.

Wow! That's pretty hot! I'm surprised you didn't cave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mother used to say - It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home.

!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mother used to say - It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home.

Well put.

[Anonymous]

For what its worth I went through a simular sitution and have regreted it ever since. I too married young like you and its been 20plus years of marriage. With me it began when this woman began working in tje same office as me, at first it was simple things complinments to each other and when my father died I was clearly upset she sat next to me and started to rub my back and consoling me
Up until that point I viewed her as a very attractive woman and she dressed very nice but felt there's not a chance a extremly beautiful woman ten years younger than me would be intrested in a forty-five year father to four kids married for two decades.
Yet the way her hands went up and down my back and the hug followed by soft kiss on my check then another on my neck got me aroused I could fell the blood rushing down below. When the day ended and it was time to go home for last four hours I kept playing over and over again in my head that kiss on the cheek then on my neck. Was it her being nice or is there something esle going on. When just then I look up and their she was saying Im worried about you are you going to ok? Sure I will be fine thanks for asking. Also do you think I can get a ride home from you Jill who normally takes me home left early today. Sure I can do that anyway get to her place she turns to me places her hand on my leg whould you like to come upstairs. I knew I should have said no but her hand on my leg felt good and I belted out yes.
We get in her apartment right away she turns facing her back my way would be nice and get the zipper for me? I couldnt believe in her place not even a minute and I am unzipping her dress, she lets it drop to the ground turns around facing me in a black lace bra with matching panties. I lost control I put my arms around her and kiss her and undo her bra it drops to the floor now she is topless reaching for my trouser. I will stop there you can guess what happend next
I spent the night with her as we behaved like teenagers on prom night do it rest a minute do it again rest and so on until the birds tweeted outside and the Sun was breaking the horizon.
Due to my father being bury a week earlier I was able to tell my wife I was drinking got so drunk wouldnt dare to drive home so got a cheap room to sleep it off I meant to call but i passed out first.
Never ever giving her any reason to doubt my word she bought my story.
This is when my nightmare began once I got home saw how concerned she was for me and worried it broke my heart knowing the truth every day since I felt shame about what I did. It got so bad I came clean and told her the truth I mean everything she deserved that much.
Seeing the pain I put on her when she learned the truth was awful I quit that job and we are sperated attending counciling she doesnt know if she can forgive me and go forward together she says she wants to but not sure. Then she let me know on many ocxassions men flirted with her came on to her one or two she found cute and sexy and yet when one leaned in to kiss her her body said yes her heart said no and turned her head away and when my best friend years ago tried to undress her at a party when she was drunk it would have been easy to let him get her naked and make love to him which you know I made no secert I find him the sexest of all your friends I said no if he did stop I will tell you about this right now no lines has been cross you tried and failed to unbutton my pants leave now and I will say nothing.
She let me know it happend to me once and i got undressed and had sex in the 20 plus years at least a half a dozen times men forced themselves on her and even leggless drunk one time she still thought our marriage meant more than a moment of lust.

If I could go back in time I would never gone inside her place. I messed up big time and if my wife doesnt return I wouldnt blame her or even shags the best man in wedding as payback then I only have myself to blame.

Good luck I hope for your sake you do the right thing

Its not worth it

[Anonymous]

This post is 8 years old! I wonder what happened to OP and this guy.