Emotional Affair When You Are Happily Married? Is this Possible?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course.

Affairs have nothing to do with the marriage. It's like being a drunk or a drug addict, the addict does not care about anything but themselves.

That's what you like to tell yourself.

[Anonymous]

I don't beleive it's possible to have a happy marriage and also have an affair. How could you be happy lying to your spouse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't beleive it's possible to have a happy marriage and also have an affair. How could you be happy lying to your spouse?

You don't have to lie to your spouse. Emotional affairs have no physical contact and if you speak at work and over text with your EA, there is no lying. There's internal confusion and maybe lying to oneself about boundaries, but it's possible to have one without lying to your spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can totally be attracted to another person even when you are happily married. The key is to set boundaries and exercise restraint. Not a big deal...especially when you are happily married.

What do you consider these boundaries?

Not PP, but I'll respond. Here are a few:

Do not share emotion topics and feelings with someone to whom you may be attracted.

Do not discuss marital problems and/or complain about your spouse.

Don't go out drinking with potential affair partners.

Avoid discussing intimate details about your life and relationship in chat rooms.

Ask yourself, would I be doing or saying this if my spouse was here?

[Anonymous]

Can someone tell me what the difference is between an "emotional affair" and a "friendship?"

[Anonymous]

What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Well, it doesn't sound like the wife considered herself happily married, if she was planning on ending the marriage. It sounds like the wife left the DH for the affair partner. That sounds brutal, but getting back to the OP's post, there doesn't seem to be much confusion on the part of the wife. The OP seems to simultaneously want to have a close marriage and a close friendship outside of the marriage. Therein lies the problem, but the other PPs are right that it comes down to strict boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

DH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

DH

It was a single co worker from work. Total cheeseball.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Maris Crane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

DH

It was a single co worker from work. Total cheeseball.

Do you have kids? Plz tell me no!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

DH

It was a single co worker from work. Total cheeseball.

Do you have kids? Plz tell me no!!

Yes. Two. Ugh. And she is totally in denial. Not doing anything to show remorse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if the emotional affair partner was counseling the wife on how to end the marriage and to seek therapy etc meanwhile teasing her with sexual emails and the like. Does the OM bear any fault in this?

Forgot to mention. The dh had no idea the wife was thinking divorce at all and the couple was making plans etc.

Are you the DH in this case and just found this out or suspect this is the situation, or are you an outside third party that knows this is occurring?

DH

It was a single co worker from work. Total cheeseball.

Do you have kids? Plz tell me no!!

Yes. Two. Ugh. And she is totally in denial. Not doing anything to show remorse.

But it never turned physical? Are you sure??