Need motivation to lose 30 pounds - for my own sake and that of my marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I went from a size 6 to a size 14 very quickly. It's not sick at all. I was not healthy and depressed by it. PArt of the reason people are so large in this country because it can never be addressed properly. For my size--5'3"-- a size 14 in 1990 (not even today's vanity sizing yet) was huge.


20 lbs would not take you from a 6 to a 14.


This.

I"m 5'2" and when I was in college I put on a lot of weight too--at my highest was around 138. At the time I was wearing at least a size 10, maybe 12. I lost 20 lbs, am the same weight now and wear a 4 or 6. When I was 112 (eg 6 lbs thinner) I was a 2. When you're this short, 5 to 7 lbs is an entire dress size.

You can drop a dress size with 5-7 lbs, but that's the smaller you get - ie, from a 4 to a 2. There is no way there is 5-7 lb between a 12-14 or something. I'm the pp who went from 185 to 130, and 14 to a 4 at 5'2" (for the most part, comparing my usual size at most stores)

Yes, the shorter you are the difference between sized might be less. But there is no way 20lbs will take you from a 14 to a 6, unless you gain competitive body-builder levels of muscle.

This is especially untrue. If you build muscle, you remain compact. Fat is much less dense than muscle. If you gain 20lbs of muscle, your size will not go up nearly as high as if you gain fat. NOT EVERYBODY IS THE SAME.

I'm 5'9". I went from 180 to 145. I went from a 14 to a 4. As I lost weight I gained muscle. I'm sitting at 15% body fat. I look like I weigh much less than my actual weight because I have muscle mass.

If I were 5'2" and lost 20lbs the same way I did at my height now, the change would be dramatic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sucks to hear the truth. I still cringe when my family confronted me about the 20Lb weight gain I had Sophomore year in college. I was in total denial (deep down I knew) but i also was hiding horrible self-esteem about it. That comment--mean from my older brother (brothers!) and exasperation from my mom and sister was a major motivation to getting things under control. I dropped the weight and now 24 years later I weigh the exact same amount (even after gaining 45 lbs with each pregnancy).

I learned:
1) I can't do scales. I get obsessed. Depressed with any fluctuations and stagnations.
2) Love of exercise is my strength. Variety is key. And just showing up---make yourself go even when you don't feel like it--start with 10 min--you'll find once you pass that mark it is easy to keep going.
3) I have never been on a 'diet'. I substitute junk for healthier things. No bagels, no mayo, cook with olive oil- no butter, no heavy sauces, light on pasta. I eat very healthy Mon-Thursday (no red meat--fish, white meat, salads at lunch). Weekends I allow myself a steak or a burger, some wine, etc. I found once I cut back on sweets--my sweet tooth just about disappeared.

Good luck.

Ew, what? Your family confronted you about a 20 lb. weight gain? That's just...sick.

I went from a size 6 to a size 14 very quickly. It's not sick at all. I was not healthy and depressed by it. PArt of the reason people are so large in this country because it can never be addressed properly. For my size--5'3"-- a size 14 in 1990 (not even today's vanity sizing yet) was huge.

20 lbs would not take you from a 6 to a 14.

It did. I started with weights for the first time in my life and I transformed my body and the way I wS shaped. Body fat went down a lot and was replaced with muscle. I have no reason to lie. It was 20 years ago.

[Anonymous]

You will feel physically better if you are overweight and get to a healthy weight, but you have emotional issues in your marriage.

[Anonymous]

I'm 5'2. At one point, unfortunately, I weighed 220 pounds - I was a 16w-18w. When I got down to 180 I was a regular size 16. 160 and I was a size 14. 150 a size 12 and my lowest has been 145 where I was a 10-12.

I suppose if I went from 145 to 125 I would drop to a 6 possibly, but at the higher numbers, you don't lose that many dress sizes in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Somewhere in your post OP, I got the impression that you understand that your primary problem is your marriage and your secondary problem is your weight.

+1

from one who's been there herself

Plus 2. Is this the first time he's drunk too much and embarrassed himself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It would not be acceptable to me for my husband to get drunk and tell me I am an embarrassment. Maybe that's okay in your marriage, but not for us. Believe me, we both have our flaws, but we do not work out our problems by hurting each other like that, or by making snide comments about the neighbors.

This! For the win.

+1 (or 2, or whatever).

[Anonymous]

Marital issues aside, I find that the quickest way for me to jump-start weight loss if I find myself creeping up is to stop buying junk food. If it's not in the house, I can't binge on it at night. I also make a conscientious effort to drink more water and not drink anything else (except coffee or tea). Late-night snacking is just a weight-killer for me, and I always feel so much better when I cut it out. I brush my teeth after dinner so the minty flavor reminds me not to eat. If you have to, take up crocheting or some other craft that requires you to use your hands--you won't want to get them dirty with food.