No one is RSVP-ing for my party

[Anonymous]

It’s the paper invite. Chances are that it got mixed up among the Christmas cards. Or the bills. Even with the best of intentions, it’s hard to remember to RSVP without a reminder, much less RSVP by a particular date.
We may mourn the loss of a pretty paper invite, but the honest truth is that must people don’t send them anymore. If you’re going to be the outlier, then you have to accept the consequences.

[Anonymous]

I have planned many parties and It's happened to me before. I'd reach out via text or phone call to guests personally a couple of days before the deadline. The personal one-on-one text usually gets people to respond yes or no.

[Anonymous]

This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

OP no one is saying this here. People are saying that their other IRL plans are in flux around those dates. You sound very condescending.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

OP no one is saying this here. People are saying that their other IRL plans are in flux around those dates. You sound very condescending.

+1 OP-you need to learn to read. No one is scolding you or doubting your ability to throw great parties. They're just saying you picked a party date when other people have a lot of commitments.

[Anonymous]

You may have rude friends - but some of my recent Paperless Posts or evites HAVE fallen into junk mail or the "Promotions" folder of my emails that Apple has categorized for me. In addition, I think I've gotten some spam invites. You might want to email your friends directly saying you want to make sure they saw the invite to your party, then provide the details (and don't include an attachment).

[Anonymous]

I can’t believe the number of people who’ve commented that you’ve chosen a bad date for a party. There are so few people who actually throw parties — your guests should be grateful that you thought of them! And they can politely decline if that’s a “bad day” for them. I’m having a party on the 20th and still haven’t received a number of RSVPs. It’s incredibly frustrating and makes you wonder if you should spend the time and money trying to provide some comfort and cheer for neighbors, family and friends. I hope those of you who’ve criticized the OP are throwing parties of your own, on “acceptable” days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

OP no one is saying this here. People are saying that their other IRL plans are in flux around those dates. You sound very condescending.

+1. Plus you were trashing introverts in an earlier post, which has nothing to do with people's availability on your party date nor their propensity to follow RSVP protocol. Maybe this is a you thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s the paper invite. Chances are that it got mixed up among the Christmas cards. Or the bills. Even with the best of intentions, it’s hard to remember to RSVP without a reminder, much less RSVP by a particular date.
We may mourn the loss of a pretty paper invite, but the honest truth is that must people don’t send them anymore. If you’re going to be the outlier, then you have to accept the consequences.

Agree. It probably looked like a holiday card and got added to the pile of cards to open when time allows or hasn't even gotten there yet.

[Anonymous]

Most people are done with going to parties after the 25th of December through the 30th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had 30% of invited people not even respond. Naive me believed what people say about “Oh Evite ends up in spam all the time!” No. Nobody I know has ever said Evite goes to spam. They either ignore the Evite or they forgot about it and it got buried in other emails.

Anyway, I naively followed up with the no response people via private email. Still nothing. No RSVP, no response to my personal email, Evite shows they didn’t even view the invite.

Just… why? It takes two minutes to go in and click No.

Did they open it? Can you tell? I had a party last weekend and sent 40 evites and almost half we never opened. When I spoke to people in person they had not gotten them. I had to send it via text and then it showed they opened it. I did a test run with my husbands email and it never went to him. Had about 35 people total. I used to think it was an excuse - but I saw first hand how some were not even delivered.

[Anonymous]

I’m so swamped with work that I haven’t checked my gmail in months.

Invites should be via usps or text.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

What are you complaining about? sounds like they RSVPed yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's a tough day to commit to.

Then rsvp tbat youre a maybe with a message.

But either you have plans and can’t go. Or you don’t have plans but want to see if something better comes along?
I can commit to stuff over winter break now, it’s not that far away.

Those aren’t the only options. We know we’re going to visit DH’s family in PA after Christmas but haven’t decided what day we’re heading up. But I would have RSVPd “maybe” and explained that.

[Anonymous]

Like others said, I’d just text people who haven’t responded on the 12th and ask if they can make it.