Women should approach more if they want to date 'in-person'

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was at an art event last night and crossed paths with a woman, who was with another woman and a guy. We first crossed paths walking past each other on the stairs and looked at each other and kept walking.

I later saw her separated from the other woman in one of the galleries and at first didn't feel like chatting with her (i wasn't in a talkative mood) so I mulled around the gallery and made a comment about her scarf as she was about to leave. Anyways we started chatting and 5 mins into the convo, she says "when I saw you on the stairs as you walked past us, i told my girlfriend how handsome you were"...

ladies...shoot your shot. If i never said something, we would've never connected.

it's exhausting to always be the one to shoot first. i don't mind doing it (it's the only way i meet people since i'm not online) but in 2025 women need to embrace more agency.

Considering how skewed towards men the benefits of sex and relationships are, and how much greater the burdens on women are of marriage and child rearing, the least you can do as a man as get off your behind and make the first move. The laziness and entitlement of this era of men is just appalling.

+1

Agreed. OP sounds like a weak petty entitled unconfident loser.

I would stop see any man who wrote this immediately.

This.

She didn’t “shoot her shot” because you’re not nearly the catch you think you are.

Men who can’t help criticizing women aren’t good options.

[Anonymous]

What Gallery? I want to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What Gallery? I want to know.

It sounds like the Whitney in NYC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:it's exhausting to always be the one to shoot first. i don't mind doing it (it's the only way i meet people since i'm not online) but in 2025 women need to embrace more agency.

Considering how skewed towards men the benefits of sex and relationships are, and how much greater the burdens on women are of marriage and child rearing, the least you can do as a man as get off your behind and make the first move. The laziness and entitlement of this era of men is just appalling.

Hell hath no fury like a woman bitter that she's expected to take responsibility for her dating instead of sitting on her hands and doing nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:it's exhausting to always be the one to shoot first. i don't mind doing it (it's the only way i meet people since i'm not online) but in 2025 women need to embrace more agency.

Considering how skewed towards men the benefits of sex and relationships are, and how much greater the burdens on women are of marriage and child rearing, the least you can do as a man as get off your behind and make the first move. The laziness and entitlement of this era of men is just appalling.

Hell hath no fury like a woman bitter that she's expected to take responsibility for her dating instead of sitting on her hands and doing nothing.

It never fails that the type of loser who expects women to approach him also lacks respect for women. We know this. That's why we don't approach. It's precisely to ensure @ssholes like you go home alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you don't seem to understand one critical thing: Waiting for the guy to approach is a useful litmus test for confidence, social skills, and proactivity. I'm by definition not interested in a man who won't approach me.

Bingo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most women are too cowardly to risk the rejection that comes with approaching people romantically. This will likely never change. It is what it is.

There's nothing "brave" about doing your job for you. You can't carry pregnancies. You can't give birth. You can't breastfeed. You don't provide jackshit that we can't provide ourselves and you make as much mess as a toddler with none of the cuteness and a lot of B.O. from all that body hair. Why exactly would we approach you when you're supposed to be giving us a reason to tolerate your parasitic, intrusive existence?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most women are too cowardly to risk the rejection that comes with approaching people romantically. This will likely never change. It is what it is.

There's nothing "brave" about doing your job for you. You can't carry pregnancies. You can't give birth. You can't breastfeed. You don't provide jackshit that we can't provide ourselves and you make as much mess as a toddler with none of the cuteness and a lot of B.O. from all that body hair. Why exactly would we approach you when you're supposed to be giving us a reason to tolerate your parasitic, intrusive existence?

You sound mad that the man of your dreams isn’t laying prostrate at your feet asking you to grace him with your wondrous presence. Find better ways to cope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But it worked because she did what she was supposed to do ..she kept making eye contact and got some time by herself so you would approach her.

it's a 5-story tall gallery - there were other baddies who I initially crossed paths with but the museum was so large I didn't see them again over the course of the evening.

that strategy works in smaller more intimate spaces. not pretty large/public areas

Again, she kept making sure she was around you so you would see her. So this strategy worked in a large event.

DP. That is exhausting. Plus the climate has changed. Most men now believe women do not want to be approached. It is time for women to put them selves out there and make the first move. Women have no excuses.

DP. No, not really. Women don't have to take on yet another responsibility because men like you have convinced themselves of some foolishness. You all know full well that what women are protesting is sexual harassment and predatory behavior. If you don't know the difference between approaching a woman respectfully in an appropriate venue versus sexually harassing her, then you need therapy and social skills education. Women don't have to do a single thing different because you have problems.

The problem is you are the logical woman applying logic

There are plenty of woman out there who find any approach by a man they feel is not worthy enough to approach them as harassment.

And now men have to deal with the whole 6,6,8 standard as the prequalifier. Or even the 6,7, 8 standard. You know who definitely didn’t come up with those….men.

[Anonymous]

I am so glad I am not dating. If something happens and my husband dies or we divorce, I’m never dating again. This thread is case in point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was at an art event last night and crossed paths with a woman, who was with another woman and a guy. We first crossed paths walking past each other on the stairs and looked at each other and kept walking.

I later saw her separated from the other woman in one of the galleries and at first didn't feel like chatting with her (i wasn't in a talkative mood) so I mulled around the gallery and made a comment about her scarf as she was about to leave. Anyways we started chatting and 5 mins into the convo, she says "when I saw you on the stairs as you walked past us, i told my girlfriend how handsome you were"...

ladies...shoot your shot. If i never said something, we would've never connected.

it's exhausting to always be the one to shoot first. i don't mind doing it (it's the only way i meet people since i'm not online) but in 2025 women need to embrace more agency.

Considering how skewed towards men the benefits of sex and relationships are, and how much greater the burdens on women are of marriage and child rearing, the least you can do as a man as get off your behind and make the first move. The laziness and entitlement of this era of men is just appalling.

Agree. I don’t like OP’s tone at all. He sounds entitled. He “didn’t feel like chatting” and there were lots of other “baddies” in the building. Barf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most women are too cowardly to risk the rejection that comes with approaching people romantically. This will likely never change. It is what it is.

There's nothing "brave" about doing your job for you. You can't carry pregnancies. You can't give birth. You can't breastfeed. You don't provide jackshit that we can't provide ourselves and you make as much mess as a toddler with none of the cuteness and a lot of B.O. from all that body hair. Why exactly would we approach you when you're supposed to be giving us a reason to tolerate your parasitic, intrusive existence?

You sound mad that the man of your dreams isn’t laying prostrate at your feet asking you to grace him with your wondrous presence. Find better ways to cope.

If there's one thing I didn't get from PP, it was interest in having a male hanger-on. You need to accept that many women consider you all to be useless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But it worked because she did what she was supposed to do ..she kept making eye contact and got some time by herself so you would approach her.

it's a 5-story tall gallery - there were other baddies who I initially crossed paths with but the museum was so large I didn't see them again over the course of the evening.

that strategy works in smaller more intimate spaces. not pretty large/public areas

Again, she kept making sure she was around you so you would see her. So this strategy worked in a large event.

DP. That is exhausting. Plus the climate has changed. Most men now believe women do not want to be approached. It is time for women to put them selves out there and make the first move. Women have no excuses.

It’s not exhausting. Jesus, are you a porn addict or something? It’s part of a very fun game and it’s the reason the human species still exists.

It's part of a "very fun" game where women don't want to play by the same rules as the guy.

You men want to opt out of raising kids and keeping a home, out of giving up your identity, but you don’t want to be the man anymore in courting or sex or in the workplace. Figure it out, Joe. You love the patriarchy so much, your snowflake butt can go up to a female and say “how are you?”. It’s not hard.

I guess let's skip past the part where I talk about being a great dad and partner in the home and the part where you don't believe me. I was pointing out that you can tell that the game isn't "very fun" for both players by the fact that women mostly only want to play by the rules for Player One and don't want to play by the rules for Player Two.

Right, we should make every change that favors you because you're the most special boy in the world like mommy told you.

I am GenX. Mommy barely knew I existed.