What do you do with your low effort kids?

[Anonymous]

Keep them in for the social aspects: taking turns, learning to be a good sport, experiencing that practice can bring improvement are all great things. It just may not be the sport they enjoy, and that fine too. Exposure is good so keep that up.

Also you might try different categories of sports. Individual vs. teams or ones that don’t have games or competitions that may feel daunting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the parent of a nationally top ranked junior athlete in a niche sport.
Many of the kids who are top ranked have started very early on (around 6 or 7) . BUT, there are also many kids who started later (around 10-11) and have achieved similar status too.
I have noticed that the kids who start later progress at a much faster pace and eventually catch up with the kids who started earlier. What I see with most kids who started late is that THEY made the decision to play the sport and they are very self motivated. They are the ones driving this vs the kids who start young who are mostly being driven by the parents.
By the time the kids who started early are 12 and 13, many are burnt out and quit. At that same age, the kids who started later are improving rapidly and are starting to shine.

So remember, it's not where you start, it's where you finish.

Anonymous wrote:
what is this like champion of underwater basketweaving where you can start later and catch up?

There is a difference between a late starter that was rocking the playground monkey bars and one that was sitting in front of the TV.

IMO Athletic kids get many benefits out of that playground. I'm guessing the OPs kids weren't climbing all over the jungle gym inside outside and on top of ... look Ma a pull up, look ma an upside down, two by two backwards on the monkey bars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We called kids like this "bumps on a log" when I was growing up. They never change.

I was kind of like this as a kid - the only sport I liked was dance because I enjoyed its musicality. I took up distance running in college and qualified for Boston one year, and now I like cycling. I just didn't like competitive sports as a kid - I was the one picking flowers on the soccer field. But glad my parents made me do some sports as a kid, because I've enjoyed being an athletic adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a 6-year-old who doesn't give much effort in any sport they've tried. Has anybody had a kid like this who grew out of it? Or is it just that our kid is not athletically inclined? If it's the latter, do we adjust our expectations and find a few physical activities that are the least intrusive to our family's schedule so they can develop some fitness and focus on other things?

I figured this was going to be about a 12 year old but six?? Maybe for your six year old it’s too rigid and organized. A six year old doesn’t need a 45” controlled class to develop fitness.

Six year olds develop control and exercise by playing. The playground, bikes, swimming, running, roller skating, playing games with balls. If the parent really is concerned about health they would put in the work. Find some bike trails even if you have to drive to them and both ride your bikes. Run or walk together to the playground. Play ball together. Dance together. Get some other kids involved if you prefer and play backyard games.

Ya, they like to dance (at home, but not in class because they dislike how often they get in trouble for not listening) and swim (but not if it’s a race). Biking is a challenge because they have anxiety about falling and complain that it’s too hard (legs tired after 2 minutes). Hiking equals whining. Playing basketball at home is fun as long as no running is required. I want to add that they are a great kid - super bright and 99% on tests and can read and do art for hours. I just get frustrated giving up finite time for athletics when they don’t engage or try and there is often a lot of whining.

Give up on the sports, she isn’t interested. And that’s not what makes a child fit. She doesn’t like walking or running, that’s tough. My mother watched my kids and occasionally the cousins. She was extremely athletic. She got them walking to the store about 2-3 miles round trip. They would walk to ice cream farm only about 3/4 miles round trip. We just walked places, no questions. Soon,her legs would be stronger. And I do think playgrounds are great for climbing, jumping, swinging, running. It’s fun so she forgets about her aches and pains.

100% Doing normal human movements like walking and running and climbing make you fit, not specialist sport maneuvers that you never use outside of your sport. The weirdest thing I ever saw in the kiddie sports world was a super amazing hitter in little leagues who couldn't climb a 20 foot ladder.

[Anonymous]

OP here with an update: we tried a new dance studio this fall that is a traditional ballet academy, and my DC seems to have found a physical activity they truly enjoy in ballet. Part of this is thanks to an amazing ballet teacher, who we lucked out with, and the rest may be that they've always liked classical music. It just suits their personality and disposition. It’s a physical activity that doesn’t require serious cardio or running at this point. They are actually practicing on their own at home. I'm happy we seem to have found something that will might them motivated to be healthy and fit. Hopefully it sticks.

[Anonymous]

What a great update! Glad she found something she likes!

[Anonymous]

There’s a reason private schools force kids to play at least one sport. Physical fitness is so important; keeps you sharp, prevents mental atrophy. Unless they’re disabled, any teen kid can run cross country.

[Anonymous]

OP Good Update! Thanks for the follow up. I think the coach has a lot to do with it. I can't hear all the stuff the coach says. They are like teachers, you don't know what they are actually saying to your kid... it's not all motivational speeches and blowing sunshine up their butts. Some of them, say hurtful stuff and that impacts the kid's motivation directly.