What do you do with your low effort kids?

[Anonymous]

I have a 6-year-old who doesn't give much effort in any sport they've tried. Has anybody had a kid like this who grew out of it? Or is it just that our kid is not athletically inclined? If it's the latter, do we adjust our expectations and find a few physical activities that are the least intrusive to our family's schedule so they can develop some fitness and focus on other things?

[Anonymous]

Are they enjoying the sport? If a 6yo enjoys it I’d let them keep doing it. If not, try other things.

[Anonymous]

Also be vigilant for signs of asthma or other medical problems, OP.

[Anonymous]

Find what they like. Martial arts, rock climbing, running club. Team sports aren't for everyone but everyone needs a physical activity.

[Anonymous]

OP here. We found a sport they like, but it's more about the social aspect of the sport than the physical activity, as they don't try. They go through the motions when it's their turn, then resume their conversations.
Even if they are the lowest effort kid in that activity, I guess they still get something out of it?

They don't have signs of asthma. We could ask their pediatrician if they think there are any other issues?

[Anonymous]

It’s ok for them to be there for the team aspect. In my experience there’s room in most rec level sports for this type of player.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We found a sport they like, but it's more about the social aspect of the sport than the physical activity, as they don't try. They go through the motions when it's their turn, then resume their conversations.
Even if they are the lowest effort kid in that activity, I guess they still get something out of it?

They don't have signs of asthma. We could ask their pediatrician if they think there are any other issues?

Same here. Having a 6 years old girl who cares about the social and snacks the most if not only. Tried gymnastics, softball, field hockey, swimming and basketball so far, but found no enthusiastic on any sport itself. Herself is very confident though.

[Anonymous]

They are six. I have two kids who are very athletic. Both will graduate high school with multiple varsity letters. One probably will choose to play in college. The other could but won’t.

At 6? One of them was daydreaming and picking dandelions. I asked him what his favorite thing was about soccer and he told me “I like when people bring their babies”.

The other played hard in games but didn’t like practice at all. Too much standing still and following directions which he had his fill of in school.

I would sign them up for rec sports if they enjoy them, and choose based on things like cost, proximity, and convenience. I would not try to predict the future or do travel with a 6 year old.

[Anonymous]

My boy put no effort into sports until high school. We never pushed it but tried to keep him active. He only became interested in following and participating in sports in high school. Obviously he couldn’t join the basketball team at that point but he did become serious about pickup playground basketball and a few other sports and it kept him super active.

The one thing I insisted on when he was young was little to no video games or screens. As long as he played outside in the neighborhood (and inside) for many hours a day, I didn’t care if he didn’t do an organized sport.

[Anonymous]

He's 6. What are your expectations? Is he enjoying it? If yes, continue, even if he's not the best/showing hustle/whatever. If he's not enjoying it, find a different activity, even if it's not a team sport.

[Anonymous]

At 6 what are you expecting? My kids didn't even play team sports at that age. If he is enjoying it and is not disruptive there is nothing to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At 6 what are you expecting? My kids didn't even play team sports at that age. If he is enjoying it and is not disruptive there is nothing to change.

Agreed 100%

[Anonymous]

Thanks all. OP here. I didn't have crazy expectations, but since DH and I are both athletic and model that for our kids, I expected we'd find some sport that they'd like enough to exert themselves and put some effort into it. To a poster above, they enjoy one sport because they have friends they look forward to seeing, though they don't try, and they are also disruptive to other kids. We'll keep trying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks all. OP here. I didn't have crazy expectations, but since DH and I are both athletic and model that for our kids, I expected we'd find some sport that they'd like enough to exert themselves and put some effort into it. To a poster above, they enjoy one sport because they have friends they look forward to seeing, though they don't try, and they are also disruptive to other kids. We'll keep trying.

You will find that, but not at 6.

[Anonymous]

Kids are who they are. My youngest son was low effort at 6… 16… and still is. No matter how much training we paid for, best equipment, etc. He just barely tries, minimal effort.